Purple Cow and Your Career Success

More on Seth Godin's books.

SG is the author of Purple Cow and other marketing books.

Interestingly, I first came across the Purple Cow back in 2006, when I hadn't even heard of SG. I was researching how to give effective presentations, and found an online article with a strange title: "Embrace The Purple Cow". I had never heard of SG or Purple Cow, and the significance of that title completely slipped me.

Funny how seemingly random events come together when you're ripe for a new idea in your life.

A few months back, I received an email invite from the professional networking association I used to attend. The invite was for a talk about business success and... the Purple Cow.

So, what or who is a Purple Cow, and what's the hype about?

According to the marketing blurb on the book -

"You're either a Purple Cow or you're not. You're either remarkable or invisible...

Purple Cow describes something phenomenal, something counterintuitive and exciting and flat out unbelievable.

Every day, consumers come face to face with a lot of boring stuff-a lot of brown cows-but you can bet they won't forget a Purple Cow.

And it's not a marketing function that you can slap on to your product or service. Purple Cow is inherent. It's built right in, or it's not there. Period.

In Purple Cow, Seth Godin urges you to put a Purple Cow into everything you build, and everything you do, to create something truly noticeable.

It's a manifesto for marketers who want to help create products that are worth marketing in the first place."

Here's SG's advice on how you can use the Purple Cow to find your dream job:

#1 You can't be Purple at the last minute. You need to be Purple before you start looking for a job. That means doing a remarkable job at work (hence the amazing referrals you'll get for internal jobs) and with clients (hence the unsolicited job offers). People who are remarkable in the way they deal with customers and clients rarely find themselves unemployed for long.

#2 Fight the temptation to print 1,000 resumes and to submit yourself to the cattle call that is the typical job search. This won't work. You'll get an average job if you do that. Instead, focus on the people who are searching for a truly special hire. If you're that person, it'll happen. What usually occurs though, is that average people are pretty desperate and try to persuade the hiring person that they are in fact remarkable. They end up not getting the job because their references belie their assertion.

So...

• Be remarkable
• Build a network of people who truly want to hear from you

...and you'll find the job you seek.

Serena Recommends: MindTools.com

I've subscribed to MindTools' newsletter for more than a year now.

The articles are excellent and I always learn something new.

You get tips and advice on:

• time management
• stress management
• communication skills
• leadership skills
• how to improve your memory
• project planning
• decision making
• problem solving

What's great is that the site caters not just to employees, but to everyone who is involved with an organization. So you could be an owner, worker, manager or HR practitioner, and you'll find something you can apply right away to improve your personal effectiveness.

If you mouse over Decision Making, for instance, you see these subtopics:

Pareto Analysis

Paired Comparison

Grid Analysis

Decision Trees

Force Field Analysis

Six Thinking Hats

Cost/Benefit Analysis

Wow.

I like the site's simple, uncluttered layout. It hints of professionalism, just what you and I would aspire to demonstrate in the workplace.

No wonder it's "The Internet's most visited career training site".

Wish I'd had access to such info when I was an employee!

Finding Your Allies: Building Strong and Supportive Relationships at Work

From MindTools.com

"A problem shared is a problem halved", as the old saying goes, and it's true in business as well.

When it comes to working your way through the challenges that you face every day, it's a great help to be able to draw on a network of supportive individuals that you can work with to find a solution.

Allies are the people who give you backing, assistance, advice, information, protection, and even friendship. They are your support base. With strong, mutually beneficial relationships with your allies, you can survive and thrive in the corporate arena, and you can get things done quicker, and more smoothly.

Working together with allies simply helps you and them achieve more. (Here, we're using the word "ally" in it's positive sense - we're not implying that you're trying to circumvent proper channels, engage in politics or game-play, or create any kind of "us and them" culture. It is clearly wrong to behave in this way.)

Anyone and everyone who can help you achieve your objectives is a potential ally.

Some are natural: These are people who share a common interest with you. The colleague who's been around for years and can offer an invaluable voice of experience, the team member who is always happy to be a sounding board for your ideas, or the vendor who is ready to accept seemingly-impossible deadlines; these people are your natural allies.

But you can find allies in unexpected places too.

Alex in finance, who pulls together an extra report on your projects finances; Claire, the secretary, who tells you when the boss is in a good mood; or Simon, your ex-department head who is always available for advice. They too are important allies.

Allies can help you directly and indirectly. For instance, if you're running behind schedule on a project, your subordinate can help you directly by working longer hours, while your boss can help you indirectly by delegating another part of your workload to someone else.

Building Your Personal Support Base
This is one of the reasons that it's important to be open and supportive to others in the workplace, and why it's worth making at least some of your time available to help others out when they need help. After all, if you're a positive and supportive person, many other people will be equally supportive towards you.

So who could your allies be? Just your team mates? Actually, your list of potential allies goes much further than this!

Rest of the article...

How Hard Do You Work?

I am reading books by Seth Godin.

Started with All Marketers Are Liars and am currently midway through Small Is the New Big.

It's a collection of A-Z essays on SG's thoughts on everything from AAA Autos to Zebra Cake. :-)

The one I want to share is A Brief History of Hard Work, Adjusted For Risk.

SG's question to us: how hard do we actually work? What exactly does it mean to work hard?

Working hard doesn't mean sitting at a desk for long hours or being always connected with your BlackBerry.

That's working long.

SG says:

"Our future in the workplace is not about time at all. The future is about work that's really and truly hard, not just time-consuming. It's about the kind of work that requires us to push ourselves, not just punch the clock. Hard work is where our future job security, our financial profit, and our future joy lie.

It's hard work to make difficult emotional decisions, such as quitting a job and setting out on your own.

It's hard work to invent a new system, service, or process that's remarkable.

It's hard work to tell your boss he's being intellectually and emotionally lazy.

It's hard work to tell senior management to abandon something that it has been doing for a long time in favour of a new and apparently risky alternative.

It's hard work to make good decisions with less than all of the data.

It's much easier to stand by and watch the company fade into oblivion.

Today, working hard is about taking apparent risk...something that the competition (and your co-workers) believe is unsafe but that you realize is in fact far more conservative than sticking with the status quo.

...many of us are choosing to take the easy way out. We're going to work for the Man, letting him do all the hard work while we put in the long hours.

Some people...are realizing that this temporary recession is the best opportunity they've ever had. They're working harder than ever - mentally - and taking all sorts of emotional and personal risks that are bound to pay off.

Hard work is about risk. It begins when you deal with the things you'd rather not deal with: fear of failure, fear of standing out, fear of rejection.

Hard work is about training yourself to leap over this barrier, tunnel under that barrier, drive through the other barrier and after you've done that, to do it again the next day.

The riskier your co-worker's hard work appears to be, the safer it really is.

It's the people having difficult conversations, inventing remarkable products, and pushing the envelope (and perhaps, still going home at 5 pm) who are building a recession-proof future for themselves.

So tomorrow, when you go to work, really sweat. Your time is worth the effort."

PS. My good friend and ex-colleague OTL is exactly the kind of hard worker SG had in mind. A visionary, always tinkering with new ideas and new ways of doing things, always challenging the status quo and asking "Why?" and "Why not?"
OTL, you'll have job security for life. :)

PPS. If you've enjoyed this post, get more SG pearls at www.SethGodin.com.

Don't sweat the small stuff. Sweat the ones that matter. :-)

The Secret to Being Happy

If you want to be happy...

For an hour, take a nap

For a day, go fishing

For a month, get married

For a year, get an inheritance

For a lifetime, help someone.

Martin Seligman

The Next Phase: Becoming A Church Elder

At last Sun's congregational meeting, CA and another member were elected elders of Hoppers Crossing Uniting Church.

When I think about how new we are in Aus and how much we have to learn about so many things here, I am like "Wow! Really?"

I remember looking up 1 Timothy in the Bible to see what the apostle Paul had to say about church leaders.

It's quite a sobering list.

A church deacon/overseer must be:

• Husband of only one wife
• Temperate
• Self-controlled
• Respectable/Worthy of respect
• Hospitable
• Able to teach
• Not given to drunkenness
• Not violent but gentle
• Not quarrelsome
• Not a lover of money/Not pursuing dishonest gain
• Must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect
• Must not be a recent convert
• Must keep hold of the deep truths of the faith with a clear conscience
• Must first be tested, and appointed only if there is nothing against them
• Must have a good reputation with outsiders

I reckon the bit about managing the family well is our Challenge of the Moment.

Beth has been acting up since she started school.

She actually defies us when we tell her to Go To The Corner, and says NO and has to be physically escorted there.

I can't believe how out of hand things get at home sometimes, and how inept I feel as a parent when the girls test our authority.

It makes me wonder: are we as a family up to handling CA's new position of responsibility?

Surely we ought to be role models like the ones described in Steve Green's Household of Faith song first?

On the other hand, this is our chance to serve in Hoppers Crossing, this community where we live, worship and go to school.

To - as a friend back home puts it - bloom where we are planted.

I need to trust that God knows what He's doing (even when I don't), that He has a plan for us, and that His plan is to prosper us and not to harm us, to give us hope and a future here, right here in the suburb of Hoppers Crossing in the City of Wyndham in Melbourne, Australia.

And not only to trust, but also to obey.

As the hymn goes: "Trust and obey/For there's no other way/To be happy in Jesus/But to trust and obey".

Goals Are Gained Through Small Steps

I love this article from Beth's school newsletter.

GOALS ARE GAINED THROUGH SMALL STEPS!

Do you feel like there's a huge gap between your present position and your ultimate destination?

You say, "Yes, I'd like to be a lawyer, but that means I'd have to go to Uni and do a degree. That would take years!"

"I have so many other things I'd like to do."

"I don't think I could take the risk. It will create financial hardship."

"I don't know how to get started."

The excuses pile up like dirty dishes in a sink; it feels like it would take too long, cost too much, require too much energy, require too many sacrifices to get from point A to point B.

Whether it's making an effort at school, or starting your own business or applying the discipline required to make it happen, the temptation is to always put it off until another time.

How do you overcome the fear of starting? The simple answer is that you reach big goals by taking small steps! While it's tempting to think that the amount of time required is too long, those days and years will pass quickly - whether you're pursuing your goal or not! You need to make an early start and for students it is right now - at the beginning of the year!

You need to show up for duty and leave the provisions - to Him. The Psalmist writes: "No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly."
(Psalm 84:11)

Trust God and take the first small step, but do something! Don't just sit around hoping it will all just fall into place. If you do nothing, we will be here same time next year, asking the same questions.

Principal
Reynald Tibbens
Heathdale Christian College

Reflection:
When you consider that this article was written for the students of Heathdale, it's just amazing.
Can you imagine the ripple effect it can have on its readers - parents, siblings, friends - and its power to change the lives of those who are ready and open?
I felt so awed and inspired when I read it, and almost wished I'd written it myself.
Its simple and succinct content is at once a reminder, a clarion call to action, a nudge in the direction of self-discipline, and something I can paste on the fridge and refer to every day.
With a Christ-focused principal like RT, I know my daughter is in good hands.

Recommended Reading: 7 Strategies to Recession-Proof Your Career

Just want to share this article by Dr. Randall S. Hansen, QuintCareer.com's Career Doctor.

I always enjoy reading the articles on QuintCareers because they are informative, full of value and written for easy reading without being overly simplistic.

If you're an employee, protecting your career and boosting your chances of being retained and promoted require a delicate balance between knowing what's going on outside the company, and being your boss' trusted resource.

Dr Hansen recommends these 7 strategies to protect your career:

1. Stay alert to the grapevine.
2. Keep your resume current.
3. Build your brand internally.
4. Become a company man/woman.
5. Build your brand externally.
6. Find career development opportunities.
7. Network.

Read the article here.

The Next Phase: Becoming A Piano Teacher

Years ago, I remember asking my best friend to connect me with her friend who was a piano teacher.

We exchanged emails but I never got round to taking action on my then vague desire to teach piano.

I felt that my Dip. in Piano Performance just wouldn't hack it if I had to submit myself to a rigorous Yamaha audition, so why bother?

When Beth got to the age of being able to sit through a Kindermusik class, I thought: maybe I could teach kiddies music?

Again, I failed to take action.

Today, I'm glad to say I've just taught my 2nd lesson to an adult learner, and it's been all good.

I reckon I'm learning as much as she is.

It's not easy finding the right words to say and I'm having to be really careful so that I am generous with praise and encouragement, and that I gently correct without being critical or judgmental.

Having been raised in a high-control, perfectionistic environment, I have to consciously censor those thoughts and remarks that would otherwise slip out.

It helps that Beth has her Yamaha Junior Music Course in the morning, and that I get to sit with her through the class and absorb some of the positive vibes from her very enthusiastic teacher and classmates. The class gives me a high and I carry some of that zeal and joy with me into my teaching in the afternoon, so it's worked out really well.

I'm so thankful that after years of dithering and non-action, I've finally found my way into teaching piano.

I plan to get better and better in my teaching and my playing so that I grow alongside my student.

The Time To Act On Your Dreams Is NOW

We are not fearless enough to take charge of our lives.

We live in the shadows of those who are our heroes and whom we are content to applaud.

Sadly, most of us don't recognise that we too have the capacity to take home the gold and consequently we live a mediocre standard of life.

Every day there is sufficient time and reason for us to do something that will propel us into becoming something bigger and better...

It's NOW that we need to do those things that should be part of our spiritual progress but sadly we haven't time just yet. The lawn has to be mowed; the dog has to be washed. By the end of the week we think we will have more time and only then will we write the poetry that is simmering inside us...


We convince ourselves that later on, next week, afterwards, soon, presently, before long, it will happen.

Yes, maybe in days to come we will have time, but is it possible that we won't be well enough, have enough money to pay for the art classes or have the vision to read the book when we finally find that elusive time?


Talk comes cheaply.

Action costs a little bit more. It takes courage and tenacity.

And guess what? Each and every one of us has enough to rule the world if we wish.

It's time to challenge ourselves because the clock ticks quietly on as we fritter away those days, weeks and months of idle talk.

Action by Lorraine Hunter
Living Now, Jan/Feb 2008 - To inspire, nurture, inform and empower
Australia's largest and finest holistic publication

I Am Only One

I am only one,
But still I am one.
I cannot do everything,
But still I can do something.
And because I cannot do everything
I will not refuse to do the something I can do.

Edward Everett Hale
Reformer, writer and chaplain of the U.S. Senate

Making Friends

I felt so proud today when Beth declared that she now has 5 friends at school: Emily, Jasmine, Madison, Connor and Joey.

She started school knowing just Joey, who was her best friend at kinder.

We're very blessed too that she has all these senior friends looking out for her, because all the kids from church are at Heathdale Christian College.

Yesterday, Georgia (Grade 3) came specially to look for Beth before school started.

When I got to band practice at church last night, the twins were disappointed that Beth wasn't with me.

But Beth's not the only one who's been busy socializing.

Dropping Beth off and picking her up everyday means I get heaps of opportunities to meet other parents.

I'm meeting new people everyday and trying hard to remember all their names and the names of their children.

A, dad to Jennifer.
L, mum to Kyle and mum of 4.
M, mum to Sarah and mum of 4 girls.
LA, mum to Jasmine and mum of 4 girls.
Sharon, mum to Riley and Alexandra.

It's a wonderful way to become part of the Heathdale community.

Just 2 days ago, one of the mums I'd struck up a conversation with, asked if I could do her a favour and take her daughter home for 2 days next week! Her husband works shifts and she hasn't got her 'P's yet. And she knows I've only just acquired my 'P's. How incredible is that?

So this afternoon, she and her daughter Sarah, who's also a Preppie, sat in our car and directed me to their home.

I assured her and her hubby I would devote some time over the weekend to memorize the route from school to their place. I know how frightening it must feel to place their daughter's safety and wellbeing in the hands of a complete stranger, especially one who's just passed her driving! They tell me they've been praying that they would meet someone they could trust to take their daughter home, and now "God has provided"!

I can think of only 2 words: Divine Appointment.

Perhaps God has planned all this so our 2 families can get acquainted and support each other.

I definitely feel like He's calling me to Higher Ground and out of my comfort zone....again.

Generation Nigella

From mX News, 1 Feb 2008

I've just learned of a new Generation, betwixt X and Y.

It's called Generation Nigella, named for Nigella Lawson, who has made home-cooking and domestication fashionable again.

Gen N refers to young, middle-class women who prefer a happy balance of home, work and family to working long hours and partying hard.

A survey of 2480 commissioned by the UK RED Magazine found that only 1% of young, middle-class women say their jobs take priority in their lives.

59% would rather work part-time if they can afford to.

36% would like to be full-time mums.

And women who give up work to stay home with young children are the happiest of all.

"Forget the '90s work/life balance, now it's home/life/work balance...Nigella has given 30-somethings permission to enjoy their homes again."

Heath Ledger: 1979-2008

We were watching A Knight's Tale last night, one of two Heath Ledger movies being screened on TV as a tribute to the Australian actor, who had died suddenly on Jan 23 at the age of 28.

At every commercial break, these terse words would flash on the screen:
Heath Ledger 1979-2008

How bleak and harsh they were.

Surely they couldn't be referring to the lively, funny, big-hearted hero being portrayed on screen.

It just didn't seem right that he was cut off before the prime of his life.

"He's younger than you," observed hubby.

"Yup, only 28, what a pity. Would you say he has achieved more than most people?"

"Of course," came the instant reply.

"Isn't it obvious?" was unspoken.

It made me think.

How do you measure the impact of a person's life against his peers'?

How do you tell what a person's legacy was, and whether he had lived to his fullest potential?

Is the significance of a man's life dictated by the length of his days?

Is the significance of a man's life dictated by how many people knew him?

By "knew", I mean not only those who, by virtue of their professional achievements and choice of profession, attained great celebrity (or notoriety) and thus were known by name to thousands.

I refer also to the many who are quietly missed and fondly remembered, whose names appear only in an obituary in the local paper, if even that.

Their names are remembered only by those who knew them personally.
But oh, what fond, funny and heartwarming tales they would tell!

They might talk of how, wherever Mr A saw need, he would plant help and hope, and how this started a cycle of paying it forward.

The legacies of these quiet heroes will live on in lives touched by the simple, ordinary acts of love, courage and kindness that they faithfully performed while they lived.

If God has created every person on this earth for a specific mission and purpose, what then was Heath Ledger's mission and purpose?

When he died as tragically as he did, had he already fulfilled his mission and purpose?

What will people remember him for 10, 20, 50 years from now?

I suppose it depends on whom you ask.

1979-2008.

2 numbers that bookend the start and end of a person's time on earth, time that once gone can never be retrieved.

1979: A baby boy is born into a loving family. His parents rejoice at this new addition to the family, and dream of what his future might be.

2008: The same parents who have lovingly raised their son to adulthood and proudly watched as he achieved worldwide acclaim for his acting talent and wise choice of acting roles, now have the grievous task of burying him.

What a sobering reminder of how volatile the future can be.

"Teach me to number my days, O Lord, that I may be wise," says the Psalmist.

Helpful resource:
http://www.holybible.com/resources/living_learning/fall_1998/teach_numbers.htm

You Are Who You Are For A Reason

Poem by Russell Kelfer
From Chapter 2, The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren

You are who you are for a reason
You're part of an intricate plan
You're a precious and perfect unique design
Called God's special woman or man

You look like you look for a reason
Our God made no mistake
He knit you together within the womb
You're just what he wanted to make

The parents you had were the ones he chose
And no matter how you may feel
They were custom-designed with God's plan in mind
And they bear the Master's seal

No, that trauma you faced was not easy
And God wept that it hurt you so
But it was allowed to shape your heart
So that into his likeness you'd grow

You are who you are for a reason
You’ve been formed by the Master's rod
You are who you are, beloved,
Because there is a God!

Anthony Robbins, NLP and Christianity

If you're a fan of self-empowerment and self-improvement, you will almost certainly have encountered Anthony Robbins at some point.

His books: Unlimited Power, Awaken The Giant Within and Giant Steps, are international bestsellers.

His seminars are legendary, as much for their drama (firewalking!) as for their cost.

While researching NLP and whether it conflicts with Christian doctrine, I came across these helpful resources:

• An article on ReachoutTrust.org about what NLP is and how its teachings are at odds with Christianity.
• An analysis of Anthony Robbins' teachings (Anthony Robbins and the Quest for Unlimited Power).

Learning Piano All Over Again

I've taken the next step in the process of shedding my classical training and all the joylessness and inhibition that came with it.

I Googled "teach piano to beginners" and found these cool sites:

www.piano-lessons-central.com
www.chordpiano.com
www.readmusicfast.com
www.playpiano.com

They are all written by US-based piano teacher Duane Shinn.

I love his video clips, especially the ones where he demonstrates complex chord progressions and improvises to different rhythms like jazz and swing (have always wanted to do that but don't know how).

I feel like I can really learn this new stuff, even if I've spent my entire childhood and adolescence steeped in a discipline I didn't enjoy.
I feel inspired to try different things the next time I go for band practice in church.
Inspiration is a beautiful thing!

The Magic Of Thinking Big

As long as you are going to go about your day thinking anyway, you may as well "think big".

Anyone can think small, and most people do.

In fact, most people keep themselves in the same place in life, doing the exact same thing, without significant growth or change because of limited or conditioned thinking.

Don't just think about what is possible, think about what might seem nearly impossible, that would require you to grow and move beyond who you currently know yourself to be.

Think about what you have always wanted to do or have in your life ... those things that your heart speaks of.

"If you can dream it, you can do it." ~Walt Disney

Thinking big equals going big.

Thinking small means staying small.

You decide.

You get to choose your thoughts.

Be outrageous and let your imagination fly.

This does not mean thinking unrealistic, pie-in-the-sky stuff, like being able to suddenly perform superhuman feats.

It means allowing yourself to stretch and believe in the beauty of your dreams.

Adapted from the Coaching Compass newsletter

Simply Music, Simply Divine

Do you, like most people, believe that a person is born musical?

That in order to master the keyboard well enough to play it for your own pleasure, you have to spend years learning it?

That only those who started learning when they were children would have any hope of getting really good at it?

While looking up the Internet for ways to teach piano to adult beginners, I came upon a fantastic site, SimplyMusic.com.

This is an Australian-developed program that teaches students to play music before they can read music, that focuses on hands-on learning rather than rote learning of theory and technique.

The program wants to make music accessible to everyone. In that sense, it's revolutionary.

I've been looking for something like this without knowing it.

I'm so excited I've printed the brochures off so I can study them properly.

If this is what it claims to be, I've just found my answer to something I've been struggling with - how to teach piano to adult learners without a piano teaching qualification and without being a concert-level pianist.

I've noticed a growing interest in my community from adults who just want to learn to play simple songs for their own pleasure and fulfilment. They're motivated, they're self-directed, they're hungry to learn. They don't want heaps of theory or to sit exams. Most importantly, they're adults, so we speak the same lingo. They're my kind of students, and I want to learn how to reach them and teach them so they can start to experience the joy and aliveness and power that Music has given me.

Just imagine the possibilities....I can hardly wait!

To Work Or Not To Work

That is the question.

Here we are again at the age-old dilemma:

Should I go back to f/t work or continue to stay home with the kids?
Is this the right time?
Is there such a thing as the right time?
Can I do both rather than either/or?
Is it selfish to want to be the best I can be, to want more than what being a SAHM can offer?
Will my kids' development and wellbeing suffer if I return to work f/t?

I am learning to think with an Abundance mentality, one that allows for the possibility of "plus" rather than "either/or", which can really limit your choices.

I find that my energies will always travel in the direction of those things I most love doing, and that financial recompense is not always the top criterion in determining how happy and fulfilled I will be.

As Stephen Covey says in The 8th Habit, where Passion, Vision, Need and Talent intersect, there will I find my Voice.

So if Internet marketing promises squillions in residual income but it doesn't give me the one-on-one human interaction I enjoy, it won't work for me. I may start with a bang but give up after a few months.

And if being a Legal Info Officer with VIC Legal Aid offers a salary that's middling but lets me feel like I'm able to help a section of the community that's disadvantaged, and also allows me to use my legal skills indirectly, then that might work out better for me.

Accepting The Musician In Me

Years ago when I was with the Music Ministry in church, I found myself grappling with feelings of uselessness and alienation.

The ministry was dominated by hip musos who jammed together effortlessly and were gifted at improvisation.

Despite years of classical training, I could barely follow the cues from the worship leader. I couldn't 'get' syncopated rhythms. Performing under the spotlight, especially on the synth, stressed me out. I found I was happier when I could 'hide' behind the piano.

Recently, I joined the musos at our new church here in Melbourne, and had to face my inner demons again.

What was different this time was that I was able to acknowledge and accept that I would always be this way: gifted at flowing, lyrical Kevin Kern-type piano music, not so gifted with songs that sound best with synth, electric guitar and drums.

I can certainly work at my weaknesses and improve on them. I did this for about 6 months between '05 and '06 at Believer Music in Sg. I enrolled in keyboard classes for church musos, started from the Basic level and worked my way up to Worship Dynamics II.

Learning with the aim of being a more effective worship muso really helped me. I could notice the difference when I played at church, and I found the confidence and inspiration I'd lost through atrophy and stagnation.

My current worship team mates have a definite preference for Hillsongs and Planetshakers, which makes it a bit of a steep climb for me. I've decided to focus on what I do well, which may mean being content to just thump out chords for the fast songs, and then, when a slower number comes along, seizing full creative licence to express myself the way I do best .

My justice or His?

As I reflected today on the never-ending issues we're experiencing with our tenants back home, I consciously tried to switch from fruitless fretting to problem-solving mode.

I opened my Bible and read the following:

Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him and he will do this:
He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when men succeed in their ways,
when they carry out their wicked schemes.

Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
do not fret - it leads only to evil.

Psalm 37:5-8

How apt and how powerful are those words of encouragement!
Even if things don't go my way, even if I make mistakes or my adversary makes a fool of me and "wins", God will make my righteousness shine if I commit my plans and problems to Him and trust Him to solve things His way.

Where Do You Grow Most - In Weakness Or In Strength?

Am reading Marcus Buckingham's excellent book, GO PUT YOUR STRENGTHS TO WORK.

Here's what he says in the intro.

"Faced with the world's indifference, you've got two options: either resign yourself to a life in which your strengths are largely irrelevant, or...learn how to make them relevant. Learn how to put them to work. It's your choice."

MB discusses 3 corporate myths.
1. As you grow, your personality changes.
2. You will grow the most in your areas of greatest weakness.
3. A good team member does whatever it takes to help the team.

Sound familiar?

#2 resonates the most for me. I'm so used to being told, even as a child, to work on my weaknesses and bad habits. Surely it makes sense to spend energy fixing what doesn't work, the way you spend more time on your weaker subjects at school or, in learning the piano, on those tricky notes in the score that your fingers keep tripping over?

But MB says we would grow so much more if we worked on expanding and using and applying our natural strengths. He does not say ignore your weaknesses. He says we will learn the most, grow the most, and develop the most in our areas of greater strength. Our strengths multiply and magnify us.

Isn't that amazing?

During practice for Sunday worship this week, I made an effort to focus on what I do best. That means playing sensitively and intuitively, playing "in the gaps", allowing others to be in the spotlight if that is their style, and doing this without feeling that I was somehow a lesser musician for not being the loudest "voice".

It's hard work. Part of me is driven by the need to excel and to shine. That part feels I am somehow a failure when my music is eclipsed by the many other instruments that are willing to lead.

I was therefore surprised when, after Sunday service, more than one person came up to express appreciation for my playing.

What I've learnt is that when I channel my energies towards my natural strengths, I am being authentic and being me, and it makes a difference to people.

Between Valley and Peak

What do you call the place between a valley and a peak?

I've no idea, but I do know I spend a lot of time there, struggling not to stay too long in the cauldron of I-could-kick-myself moments, and grizzling about the chaos of the present.

I hate chaos.

The domestic kind must be the worst. I'm not particularly gifted in organizing and managing the household, and only occasionally feel a need to sort, organize and restore order. By that time, of course, the task requires Herculean effort, which makes me even more grouchy.

My hubby thinks I do very little housework at all.

Yesterday, for instance, I managed to unpack a few boxes, which contributed noticeably to the improved amount of walking space in the dining room, and he was all praise. Today, I was only able to tick some minor items off my to-do list (make appointment with optometrist to get Beth fitted for glasses, unpack and sort toiletries, see that gardener removes dead trees), and he joked that perhaps I had merely shifted things from one part of the room to the other!

Obviously, we need to work on our expectations...

I question my motives for being a SAHM every now and then. I sometimes wonder if I've chosen this path primarily to escape the rigours of corporate life (a cop-out?), or to devote myself to the family.

I have to work hard at being a nurturing mum as it doesn't come naturally. I'm not one of those mums who are happy to spend all day playing with and attending to the kids. And I definitely don't cope well with having other people's kids over without notice.

I survive on a curious mix of "being there" without always being there.

If you know what I mean.

In the sweet moments when I am fully present with the kids (and they know when that is, esp J, who is all sweetness and light when I'm paying attention to her, but grizzly and whiny if I multitask), I know I've made the right decision. But when I'm itching to write or to curl up and read The Age (okay, maybe just the My Career or Domain sections) without someone hanging on to my leg or demanding to be carried or wanting help in the toilet, I wonder if I've made the wrong decision.

Time is hurtling by more quickly than ever, each year is more exhausting than the one before, and it'll be another 4 years before J is as independent as Beth is now.
Can I take another 4 years of this?
When is a good time to get going on my business and career aspirations?
Is there even a "good" time?

Mind-Renewing Books

On Sunday, I picked up the following books at the library:

LEARN TO EARN by Lynch & Rothchild
THE PRESENT by Spencer Johnson, MD
SCREW IT! LET'S DO IT by Richard Branson
TOP 10 DUMB CAREER MISTAKES by Lona O'Connor

I've been so swamped lately that reading has taken a back seat, so I was really glad to get into these.

I read The Present very quickly, and initially thought it somewhat simplistic. My first reaction was: a book like this can be a bestseller??

But as I got to the end, I realized I agreed with a lot of what was said. I recognized the traits about myself that I don't like, the ones that have held me back from succeeding.

There's quite a bit to chew on in the days ahead, but the main ideas I've taken away can be very simply phrased:

Learn from the Past (not live in the past, which I sometimes do when I hold on to past glories or past hurts)
Live in the Present (which is where I'm not, because I'm either regretting past mistakes or worrying about things which have not yet happened)
Plan for the Future (not just dream about the future - big difference there, as the dream is the beginning, but the plan helps you get there)

Interestingly, when I read Richard Branson's book next, it seemed to reinforce what I'd just learnt from The Present.

Here's what Branson says on p66:

Always living in the future can slow us down as much as always looking behind. Many people are always looking ahead and they never seem content. They look for quick fixes, like winning the lottery. I know that goals are important. Money is important. But the bottom line is money is just a means to an end, not an end in itself. And what is going on now is just as important as what you're planning for the future. So, even though my diary is full for months ahead, I have learned to live for the moment.

Isn't that another way to say we must learn to live in The Present?

Living in the Present is very hard. When I'm feeding my baby, my mind is on what else I need to accomplish that day. When I'm on the phone, I'm sometimes guilty of reading email at the same time. I pride myself on my ability to multitask, but really, this is just a thin disguise for always wanting to be somewhere else.

What particularly made me smile about Branson's book is how he constantly acknowledges the role of his family in helping him succeed, and how he in turn tries to instil the same groundedness, unconditional love and family closeness in his children.

This is a man of balance, a man who has got his priorities right.

Another gem I picked up is from a story about how he raised funds to buy an old manor house in Oxford to set up a studio to make records. He was still 7,500 pounds short after borrowing from the bank and from his trust fund, and his dad suggested he talk to his Auntie Joyce. She offered to lend him the money, to be paid back with interest when he could afford it. When he started to thank her, she said, "What's money for anyway? It's to make things happen."

That's what she said! Money is To Make Things Happen. To make dreams come true. To help people in need. To solve problems. To heal. To educate. To build goodwill. To give options and choices to those who have it.

That, I think, is a very healthy, wholesome and practical way to view money. I have many hang-ups about money which are rooted in the way I was raised and by social conditioning. I recognize this and am trying to work through the needless emotional and psychological turmoil caused by my false beliefs.

Money is To Make Things Happen.

By itself, it will not make me happy, because I will always encounter something I can't afford. I should not crave it for itself, as though once I achieve a fixed dollar figure, it will guarantee me financial security and peace of mind. Money can be lost in any number of ways.

BUT I cannot run the other way and label money as the root of all evil either, as that is just a way to avoid making responsible decisions about how to use money.

I need to keep reminding myself where money comes from (God) and what it is for (to make things happen, to do good, to share God's bounty).

Reluctant Entertainer: Entertaining vs Hospitality

This Crosswalk article captured my attention with its headline: Reluctant Entertainers: Hospitality Is A Gift You Can Give.

I am definitely a Reluctant Entertainer. I can think of so many occasions when the thought of people coming to visit stressed me out totally.

To me, having visitors means putting my home on display. Being judged. Being vulnerable to someone else's approval/disdain.

If that sounds terribly negative, it's because I'm a perfectionist by nature.

If I have guests over, the house has to be immaculate.

Not necessarily Martha Stewart style (I'm not Martha, plus I have 2 little ones), but certainly the toys, unironed clothes and dirty laundry must be hidden away, the floor vacuumed and mopped, tables and chairs aligned, the bathroom basin polished and vanity area cleared.

Nothing stresses me out more than suddenly noticing that a table or chair is not perfectly lined up with the floor tiles.

It's mad, I know, but it's this sort of purposeless detail that drives me to distraction.

That, and what to cook/serve.

I'm a middling cook to start with. My hubby's domestic skills are honed to a far higher degree, plus he is a very relaxed, laid-back sort. If the curry doesn't turn out perfect, he'll just laugh and apologize. But if it happened to me, I'd be stressing out thinking "Arrgh! What'll I do now? What will they think of me? I'm a failure!" etc etc.

Instead of focussing on being present with guests and enjoying their company, I'd be thinking ahead to what needs doing next. Very Martha, isn't it. Like the Martha that Jesus lovingly chided for trying too hard.

I think I'm improving a bit though.

Now when my cousin comes by, I sometimes toss out all inhibitions and invite her to stay for a meal. Even if there's nothing much in the house except canned food.

I may even be turning into a sort of domestic goddess of comfort food of the canned variety.

You know, you can whip up a pretty decent meal with Campbell's cream of mushroom soup + baked beans with spam...

Watch This Video: Why I Love To Go To Work Everyday

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=goxxbZVSxxc

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Fabulous Footy Analogy

I love the opening paragraph of this article from The Sunday Age.

In football, as in life,
actions become habits,
habits become character,
and character becomes destiny.

Isn't that beautiful?

The article praised the team spirit and mental strength of 2007 Brownlow medallist Jimmy Bartel of the AFL Premiership Cup champions Geelong Cats.

There's a lot of truth in the quote.

What we do daily, over time, becomes a habit.

Good ones make my character. Bad ones derail me.

If I choose to form good habits and build my character, I set myself up for success.

If I choose laziness, procrastination and decision making based on wrong values, I set myself up for personal failure.

Each choice leads to a different destiny.

Which destiny do I choose, short-term gratification or long-term fulfilment?

The choice is not always obvious or easy.

Saying yes to LTF means saying no to pleasant distractions along the way. The latest property listings, Sunday Age and even the mid-afternoon cuppa must wait while I get through the hard work of writing an article, calling a potential business partner or packing for our house move.

Aus Universities Become A Mecca With Their Call To Prayer

http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/australian-universities-become-a-mecca-with-their-call-to-prayer/2007/09/21/1189881777596.html

2 things from this article made me smile:

1. According to the Saudi Ambassador, Aus has replaced the US as the most popular overseas destination for Saudi students.
The popularity of Aus is due to: (a) good reports from students here flowing back to Saudi Arabia; (b) the high standard of education here; (c) universities have been supportive in providing prayer and ablution rooms.

2. On concerns that potential terrorists could enter Aus with an increase in foreign students, Adjunct Prof Charles Mott, who promotes LaTrobe Uni's international relations, had this to say: "Our experience with Arab students and wider Muslim students coming here has been very good. You have to have in mind, for many coming to a country like this, it represents a substantial cultural change...these students have fitted in very well."

The Saudi Ambassador's view: Education is vital "if you want...to build relations and understand each other's culture", and that a relationship built solely around trade "never builds relationships".

Reflection
How wise and wonderful are these words!
That they come from 2 men of culturally diverse backgrounds, both no doubt men of influence in their own spheres, speaks well for the efforts of all who seek after peace.

Through the free exchange of informed views, we begin to build an awareness of ourselves and of our fellow human beings, and to appreciate the differences of race, language, religion and culture that make each of us unique.

Education is the key to understanding, and the bridge across all man-made barriers.

News like this makes me glad, proud, thankful and humbled.
We are inundated with bad news everyday, and a bit of good news is a powerful antidote to the gloom and doom.

I feel blessed to live in the midst of those who take the trouble and make the effort to show respect for another's cultural and religious needs.

When this other is a student who is here to learn, imagine the power and influence of this positive experience on him when he goes back to his own country.
Who knows what wonderful things he may one day do because he received hospitality and understanding as a student in a foreign country?

4 Simple Questions To Save Money Every Time You Shop!

by Wayne Berry

Negotiating is a term often associated with high level board room meetings and political and international wrangling, but the truth is we all have opportunities to negotiate every day.

Once we recognise this, we are set to save cash every time we buy.

The fact is everything is negotiable. Everything! The problem is that in our culture, most Australians are "conditioned" to believe that either most things are not negotiable or that it's not "nice" to negotiate.

To prove my point I went shopping one Saturday morning a few weeks ago with a friend and his wife who had both read my book "Negotiating In The Age Of Integrity" but were still not sure that they could really use the ideas there.

Read here to discover how Wayne Berry's experiment went.

Simple Strategies To Success

By Jim Rohn
Published 09/20/2006

Jim Rohn is renowed as one of America's foremost business philosophers www.jimrohn.com

My first mentor, Mr. Shoaff, over a five-year period of time before he died at age 49, taught me some extraordinarily simple things.

He only went through the 9th grade in school. He never finished high school, never went to college, and never went to a university. So he put his experiences and ideas in very simple language, which, I think for me - kid from the farms of Idaho - was so important.

When I would say, "This is all the company pays."

Mr. Shoaff would say, "No, that is all they pay YOU."

I thought, "That is a new way to look at it."

I told him things cost too much.

But he said, "No, you can't afford them."

Well, that was a new concept for me.

He promised that if I would improve, then I would qualify for more money. So I learned that we don't have to work on the company, we have to work on ourselves.

If it had been technical, I would have missed it. If it had been mystic, I would have backed away. But it was just basic, blunt "a-b-c" familiar stuff that I hadn't thought of before. For me it was the beginning of what he called "personal development".

Mr. Shoaff also taught me that life puts some of the more valuable things on the high shelf so that you can't get to them until you qualify. If you want the things on the high shelf, you must stand on the books you read.

With every book you read, you get to stand a little higher.

And the "biggie" that forever had an impact on me, "Success is something you attract by the person you become."

That phrase changed my life. Success is not to be pursued, but to be attracted by the person you become.

Put your energy into becoming a better you, the best you. Learn the skills. Practice the skills. Attract the success.

These simple strategies and ideas helped change my life, forever, for the better.

Thank you, once again, Mr. Shoaff.

Planning and Decision-Making: A Biblical Perspective

By Os Hillman

Any enterprise is built by wise planning, becomes strong through common sense, and profits wonderfully by keeping abreast of the facts.
(Proverbs 24:3,4 LB)

Owning and operating an advertising agency meant I was required to develop strategic plans for companies. This meant developing plans several years ahead.

I have always believed in planning ahead. I have written many strategic plans for companies over the years.

However, there was a time when I experienced a constant state of uncertainty in my business and personal life, and I realized I could only plan so much. Things changed from day to day.

This inability to plan more than a week, or in some cases a day in advance, caused me to rethink the whole idea of planning as it relates to life and work. God was doing something in my life that could not be planned. So, if I sought to develop specific plans around what I thought God was doing, Iran adrift. It was only when I knew what God was leading that I could plan effectively.

It's a problem of using a human, logical approach versus a Spirit-led approach.

I have discovered in working with so many Christian organizations over the years, and even in my life, that human planning without the Spirit of God leading in that planning leads to presumption, failure and disappointment.

The people of Israel often fell into the habit of their own reasoning apart from the spirit of God. This frustrated God because He actually desired to accomplish things in a shorter timetable, but was unable to due to Israel's disobedience.

I am the LORD your God, who brought you up out of Egypt. Open wide your mouth and I will fill it.

But my people would not listen to me; Israel would not submit to me. So I gave them over to their stubborn hearts to follow their own devices.

If my people would but listen to me, if Israel would follow my ways, how quickly would I subdue their enemies and turn my hand against their foes! (Psalm 81:10-14)

God can accomplish more in six months through a people yielded to Him than we could accomplish in 70 years without Him. God wanted to accomplish His plan for the people of Israel a lot faster, but their disobedience prevented them from allowing Him to move on their behalf.

I must confess that it is a whole lot easier to develop a written plan for my life and execute that plan than to depend on God each day. Total dependence is a humbling condition. Unfortunately, that is exactly how God wants us to walk with Him -- in total dependence on Him day-by-day.

God is tearing apart the plans of many men and women in the workplace today because He wants to rebuild them in the way they operate in life and work. He wants total dependence upon Him, not just an occasional prayer of guidance.

George Mueller
George Mueller was a pastor in England during the nineteenth century. He was concerned that God's people had become very discouraged. They no longer looked for God to do anything unusual. They no longer trusted God to answer prayers. They had lost their faith.

Mueller began to pray as God led Him. His prayers were for God to lead him to a work that could only be explained by the people as an act of God. George wanted the people to learn that their God was a faithful, prayer-answering God.

He came upon the verse in Psalm 81:10 -- "Open wide your mouth and I will fill it." God began to lead him in a walk of faith that became an outstanding testimony to all who hear of his story.

When he felt led of God to do some work, he prayed for the resources needed and told no one of the need. He wanted all to know that God had provided for the need only in answer to prayer and faith. During his ministry in Bristol, Mueller started Scriptural Knowledge Institute for distribution of Scripture and for religious education. He also began an orphanage.

By the time of his death, George Mueller had been used by God to build four orphan houses that cared for 2,000 children at a time. Over 10,000 children had been provided for through the orphanages. He distributed over eight million dollars that had been given to him in answer to prayer. When he died at 93, his worldly possessions were valued at $800.

Oswald Chambers made an observation about planning. "Much of modern Christian enterprise is 'Ishmael.' Born not of God, but of an inordinate desire to do God’s will in our own way – the one thing our Lord never did.

"The LORD foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations. (Psalm 33:10-11)

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. (Isaiah 55:8)

Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose thatprevails. (Proverbs 19:21)

Our biggest problem with planning is that we plan and carry out things in our own wisdom that only God has a right to determine. We cannot know the when, or where, or how of God's will until He tells us. God's whole method of directing us is designed for us to experience Him in the process of walking with Him. It is process-based versus outcome-based.

The methods that God used to accomplish His purposes were creative and often illogical to the human mind. Consider God requiring Joshua to walk around the city of Jericho seven times, or standing at the waters edge of the Jordan before God parted the waters for the people to pass on dry ground. Consider the blind man being told to wash his eyes with mud in order to receive sight. Consider Gideon being charged to fight with only 300 against many thousands.

The stories are numerous. They all demonstrate one undeniable fact about how God operates and plans. He does not want us depending on our own resources in any area of our lives. He wants us to depend on Him for every area. He wants us to live in the supernatural as compared to the natural.

Confirming Decisions
Now that we have established some guidelines for planning, we need to discuss ways to confirm our plans. There are times when we must make quick decisions during the course of a day and we need to have the freedom to use our God-given wisdom to make those decisions.

God speaks throughmany different ways and as we become one with Him, we become more integrated in our ability to move and be led by the Holy Spirit (Rom. 8:14). The scriptures do not indicate that God was constantly communicating moment by moment with His people. However, God does encourage us to seek Him moment by moment in our lives.

Not every decision we must make can afford, nor is it necessary, to be confirmed. Jesus encourages us to abide in the vine, which means we should be walking in close fellowship with Him and know that He is guiding us throughout our day.

However, the scriptures also convey a principle of confirmation that can greatly reduce the frequency of making poor decisions and allow us to make good plans. I would highly recommend that any major decision be confirmed through a few different sources.

F. B. Meyer’s Formula
One night as the famous Bible teacher F.B. Meyer stood on the deck of a ship approaching land, he wondered how the crew knew when and how to safely steer to the dock. It was a stormy night, and visibility was low.

Meyer, standing on the bridge and peering through the window, asked “Captain, how do you know when to turn this ship into that narrow harbor?”

“That’s an art,” replied the captain. “Do you see those three red lights on the shore? When they’re all in a straight line I go right in!”

Later Meyer said: “When we want to know God’s will, there are three things which always occur: the inward impulse, the Word of God, and the trend of circumstances…Never act until these three things agree.”

The Role of Spouses in Making Decisions
When John Benson decided to make some financial investments in a new business venture, he was very excited about the possibilities for a handsome financial return. His business and financial background had served him well.

John felt strongly that his wife Jenny would not understand the complexity of his investment, so he casually mentioned it to her. When she asked a few simple questions, John became defensive and justified his investing in the venture.

Jenny felt uneasy about the investment, but since he had been so successful in the past, she laid aside her reservations and left the responsibility up to John.

A year later, after investing a large sum of money, John received a phone call from the investment company. It seems that the principals of the company had fled the country and were not to be found. All the investors who had put money in the company were going to lose their investment with no ability to recoup it. Many astute investors had been taken in on the scam.

This story could be retold repeatedly across the world. God’s principles for making decisions require input from both spouses, regardless of their level of expertise.

I learned this lesson the hard way after making many independent decisions outside the counsel of my wife. Today, whenever I am faced with a major decision, I first consult the Lord, and then I consult with my wife. She may disagree totally with something that seems very straightforward to me, but I have learned not to not move forward if she is not in agreement. She does not need to know all the details, nor does she have to have expertise. God has placed in her a “chip” called“intuition”. That intuition cannot explain why she feels the way she does, she just knows when something is not right.

Conversely, husbands bring a totally different perspective that may give an alternative side to asituation that the wife has never considered. God has called married couples to be one. If we seek to make decisions independently, then we are benefiting from only 50% of the intended resource God has placed within our grasp.

In marriage, this stewardship of decisions requires two people. God blesses this union by honoring the decisions made with the motive of glorifying God and relying on His Spirit to lead in our decision-making process.

Confirmation Through Others
The scriptures encourage us to seek advice and counsel from others. This counsel needs to be from other Godly people who share the same values and goals that we have.

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. (Proverbs 15:22)

The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.(Proverbs 12:15)

Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice. (Proverbs 13:10)

Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will bewise. (Proverbs 19:20)

Make plans by seeking advice; if you wage war, obtain guidance.(Proverbs 20:18)

Keeping A Balance With Counsel from Others
We should strive to maintain balance when seeking input from others and making decisions as we feel God is leading. This process is designed to confirm direction for which we are seeking confirmation.

Paul was sensitive to getting too heavy-handed in the confirmation process. He offered advice but was not the enforcer of someone’s decision.

And here is my advice about what is best for you in this matter. (2 Corinthians 8:10)

There is a principle of agreement among two or three individuals throughout the scriptures to confirm a decision, but even this does not negate a person’s right to make independent decisions. The requirement for efficient administration frequently requires single points of decision-making. Where there is willingness and trust to receive input, there is probably also humility, faith, and grace for God to work His pleasure in His servant. Where there is unwillingness, the opposite is true.

There have been times in my life where I have felt strongly about a certain issue only to receive feedback from those close to me which revealed that I was not accurate in my assessment of the situation. I have learned to yield in such situations, trusting that God is working through those in whom I am accountable.

Peace of Mind
Peace of mind is another important confirmation for decisions. If you do not have peace about a decision, you should wait until God gives you peace. This does not mean your decision may not have some tension due to the faith aspect of it, but deep down you should have a peace that it is the right decision.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Phil 4:6-7)

I hope these thoughts will help you as you seek to plan and make decisions through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Courage for the Timid and Insecure

Some of us are timid by nature.

Prone to self-doubt, we require constant affirmation and approval which others are not always prepared or able to give.

This sometimes extends to matters of faith, when we allow our relationship with God to be clouded by what a third party - a loved one, a concerned friend, a fellow Christian, an unbeliever - thinks.

We need to remind ourselves that we are all imperfect. Even the most saintly person has sinned at some point in thought, word or deed. When we stand before God on Judgment Day, we shall then see ourselves and each other clearly, and there will be surprises.

The Bible warns that the word of God is living and active. It judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart (Heb. 4:12), the very things that are invisible to the outside world. The world prizes appearance and image above truth. The Bible says nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight (Heb. 4:13). The eyes of the Lord are in every place keeping watch on the evil and the good.

What comfort then, for those who are timorous of spirit and do not know how to assert themselves effectively?

What encouragement can we offer those who crave external confirmation that they are doing the right thing?

What advice do we give someone who is in need?

Paul says we should hold firmly to the faith we profess, because we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God. (Heb. 4:14) It is not in our imperfect selves or in another's opinion that we should trust (thank God!), but in the One who is perfectly trustworthy and dependable - Jesus.

We rejoice because not only is Jesus deserving of our trust, He is also compassionate and merciful. He does not stand afar and mock our weak attempts to live right. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet without sin. (Heb. 4:15)

If we remember that no one is above sin, we will have a healthier view of others and of ourselves.

We will learn to expect less from those who always seem to have their act together, who can seem to do no wrong, because we know that inside, they are as fallible as anyone else.

We will learn to be gentle with ourselves when we slip, because Jesus is Himself gentle and merciful.

Does this mean we can compromise our morality or close an eye to sin because it is to be expected of a fallen world?

No. The Bible makes it very clear that we must give account to God for the thoughts and attitudes of our hearts and everything we do in this lifetime.

How then should we ask for help?

Heb. 4:16 says that those who need help can ask for it and receive it. Not in a grovelling manner, as though God might say 'no' or 'go away', but with confidence, because He is a God of mercy and grace.

With God we have no need to "stand on ceremony", feel "pai seh" or feel we are unworthy of good things. A child never doubts that Mummy or Daddy will give him the peanut butter sandwich or bike that he asks for. So too can we go to God naturally and confidently to ask for what we need.

This may be a difficult thing to accept for those accustomed to being told they are unworthy of love or plain "not good enough". Not all of us have had the blessing of being raised in a loving, accepting environment.

But with God, we can start anew.

We can ask for courage to confront, accept and overcome our imperfections.

We can ask for a healthy dose of self-love so that we can begin to lead fruitful lives, unencumbered by memories of past pain and rejection.

We Can Ask.

Introduction to NLP

The following article is from Coaching Inspirations, a newsletter of the Life Coaching Institute of Australia.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming: An Introduction

The term "Neuro-Linguistic Programming" (NLP) refers to the models and principles that relate to the interaction of mind and neurology (neuro), language (linguistic) and perception. These interact to create an individual's subjective reality and behaviour.

History

In the 1970s, Richard Bandler, a psychology student, and John Grinder, an associate professor of linguistics, studied the language and behavioural patterns of successful and effective therapists. The results of this research sparked the emergence of a new field - the field of neuro-linguistic programming (NLP).

Current Status

Today, NLP is used internationally by millions of people within an array of occupational groups, from counsellors, coaches and motivational speakers to sales managers and marketers. Many neuro-linguistic programming techniques have arisen that provide step-by-step procedures for 'running your own mind' in an attempt to produce excellence in performance. With such an assortment of techniques on offer, any attempt to condense the entire scope of NLP into one resource would serve only to dilute its essence.

You will be introduced to the fundamental techniques of NLP using representational systems to develop rapport, reframing to alter the meaning of an experience and the swish pattern to alter ineffective behaviour patterns. Each of these techniques can be expanded or modified depending on its intended aim or purpose.

Over the course of NLP's development, various 'schools' or 'branches' of NLP have emerged. If you conduct your own research in this area, you may notice that different 'brands' of NLP exist, each with their own set of standards and procedures.

Essentially, NLP is a very specific way of modelling. If, for example, you know somebody who is an excellent tennis player and you would like to play just like him/her, what would you do? You could study what makes this person a good player and then model exactly what is done. In essence, it is this modelling that NLP practitioners are focused on. The aforementioned tennis player may envisage, for example, the tennis ball hitting the racket, just before it happens.

Presuppositions

The map is not the territory: Our mental representations (or maps) of the world are not the world. We respond to our mental maps, rather than the world. Mental maps, especially feelings and interpretations, can be modified, updated or altered more easily than the world around us can be changed.

Experience has structure: Our thoughts and memories have a pattern or structure to them. When we change that pattern or structure, our experience will change. We can neutralise unpleasant memories and enhance those memories that serve us well.

If one person can do something, anyone can learn to do it: We can learn the mental map of someone who has achieved what we seek to achieve and in that way, make it our own.

The mind and body are parts of the same system: Our thoughts continuously affect our physical being - muscle tension, breathing, emotional reactions, and more. These in turn affect our thoughts. When we learn to change one, we have simultaneously learned to change the other.

We cannot NOT communicate: We are always communicating. If we are not speaking, we are at least communicating non-verbally. Words are often the least important part of any communication transaction. A sigh, a smile and a look are all communications. Even our thoughts are an inner form of communication that are conveyed or revealed to others through such indicators as our eyes, voice tones and other non-verbal cues.

The meaning of communication is the response we get: Others receive and filter what we say and do through their own mental maps. When someone interprets our words or actions differently to how we intended, it's a chance for us to take note and seek to modify our communication so that next time it is clearer.

Underlying every behaviour is a positive intention: Behind every hurtful or thoughtless behaviour there exists a positive purpose. When somebody yells, for example, they may be seeking acknowledgement. Someone may hit out in an attempt to protect themselves from perceived danger or hide in order to feel safe. Rather than condemning or judging these actions, we can identify the positive intent and encourage more positive choices that meet the same intent.
People are always making the best choice(s) available to them: Everyone has a unique personal history. Within it, we have learned how to respond to life events and experiences. The choices each of us make are the ones we believe to be best for us at that particular point in time.

Process

To understand the process of NLP, the first stage is to understand where the process begins. The process begins with an event external to the individual that is experienced through the sensory input channels:

Visual: including what we see or the way someone looks at us.
Auditory: which includes sounds, the words we hear and the way that people say those words to us.
Kinaesthetic: or external feelings, which include the touch of someone or something, the pressure and the texture.
Olfactory: which is smell.
Gustatory: which is taste.

Extracted from James, T., & Woodsmall, W. (1988). Time Line Therapy and the Basis of Personality. Capitola: Meta Publications.

Before we make an internal representation of an event we filter it through a variety of internal processing filters. These filters can delete, distort or generalise information, leading to an inaccurate or modified version of the experience.

Deletion involves the process of selectively paying attention to specific aspects of an experience (James & Woodsmall, 1988). Through deletion we fail to notice particular sensory information. For example, Ben's sister is picking him up from a concert. He is looking out intently for her car which he knows is a bright red hatchback. Because he is so focused on seeing a small red car, he fails to hear his sister calling him from a blue sedan (which she had borrowed from a friend). As you can see from the example, Ben is so focused on the visual aspect of his experience (see a red car) that he fails to notice (or deletes) the auditory aspect of his experience (his sister calling him).

Distortion occurs when we misrepresent the sensory data received (James & Woodsmall, 1988). For example, Juanita thought she heard rain falling. She ran out to take her washing off the line only to discover that it wasn't rain at all - it was the sound of the neighbour's air conditioning starting up. This is an example of auditory distortion where Juanita thought she heard one thing when in fact it was something completely different.

Generalisation is the process of making a judgement based on a limited number of experiences and attributing that judgement to a broad array of experiences (James & Woodsmall, 1988). For example, Tyson and Nicky are looking to rent a new home. They visit their local real estate agent.

Tyson feels as though this particular agent is only interested in working with people who are seeking to purchase a home, rather than rent one. Nicky later overhears Tyson say to a friend, "Real estate agents are all the same. They only want your business if you're buying!" As you can see from this example, Tyson has had one experience with one real estate agent and generalises this to all real estate agents.

The Feminist Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much? by Leslie Bennetts

The main thing I want to say to other women is this: protect yourself.

Given the likelihood that you will have to fend for yourself at some point in the future, maintain the capacity to support yourself.

Protect your children by making sure you can support them financially should anything happen to their father.

Protect your future happiness against the doubts harboured by frustrated stay-at-home mothers who can't shake the guilt and regret they feel about failing to explore their full potential.

Protect yourself against the desolation of the empty nest, which inflicts the deepest sense of loss on full-time mothers with no other identity to sustain them.

Protect yourself against the feelings of uselessness and isolation experienced by so many women who didn't cultivate meaningful work that would nourish them in later years.

You'll be glad you did.

Future Proof Your Career

How will your job be different five years from now? Indeed, will your job even exist in its present form in five years, or in 10 or even 20 years time? And over this time, what will happen to the company and industry you work for?

We really don't know what the future holds. What we do know for certain is that change is a constant in the workplace. This means that what we are doing now will be different in the future.

How can you predict and prepare for this workplace of the future? What should you be doing now to avoid reaching a dead end in your career?

This article gives you some strategies you can begin pursuing now. They will help you keep your skills current and your opportunities open. Pick and choose from among them to build your unique Future Proofing Kit. And remember, as your own circumstances change, your kit may need to adapt as well. Refer back to this list often and take inventory of what you should be doing either differently from, or in addition to, what you are doing now.

Future Proofing Kit
Find an "Academy" company. If you're early in your career, get a job at a company renowned in its industry for developing its people (traditional examples are GE, Toyota and Mars.) When you work for this kind of company, you are enrolled in a continuous development program that goes well beyond the technical skills you need for your current role. This forms a great foundation for a successful career.Get and remain tech-savvy.

Much of the change we see has to do with new technology. We keep finding faster and leaner ways to do things. Force yourself to keep your technical skills current, even if new developments don't seem directly related to your current job. Otherwise, you'll get left behind and may have to catch up a huge amount before you can head off in a new direction in the future. If that means learning the newest online tools like blogging and web conferencing, do it. If you're in a highly technical field of work, be proactive and stay current - even when your company does not.

Develop your competencies, skills and experience.
Along with technical skills, it is critically important to continue your professional development to remain in demand in the marketplace. Make sure you develop the transferable skills that are universally sought by employers. Leadership, communication, innovation, stress management and interpersonal skills are all fundamental requirements of the jobs of today and tomorrow.

Here are some ways to do this:
Choose two competencies or skills to improve each year. Monitor and track your progress.
Develop a five year learning plan to acquire the knowledge and education you need.
Develop cross-functional skills. Beyond a certain stage in your career and in uncertain environments, specialization is no longer the route of choice. It can pay off for some; however, it has high risk of obsolescence attached.

And yes, consider joining our Career Excellence Club to learn these skills.
Your specific technical skills may get out of date. That's why you see nurses with business skills and technology experts with financial experience. A broad range of competencies, skills and abilities can help you secure a new job or may even open the door to working in a new industry.

To maximize your chances of success, use the tips found in the Personal Goal Setting article to help you set development goals effectively, and if you have our Personal Development Plan Workbook, make sure you use it to plan your skills development.

"Think global."
In many industries, geographical barriers to business are getting less and less relevant. Your co-workers, clients and stakeholders now and in the future can be from anywhere in the world. You need to acquire the ability to work within the international marketplace by:
Learning about working with diverse cultures.
Asking for assignments that require international exposure.
Learning another language.

The more experience you get, the more confidence you will have when working in the global marketplace. This will make you much more attractive to employers in the future.

Create and maintain a success journal.
The time to start thinking about your accomplishments and skills is not when you are looking for a new job. You need to be proactive and take continuous inventory of what you do really well, the accolades you have been given and the noteworthy results you've been responsible for. Employers want to know what you will do for them. When you have a ready list of things you have done, it is much easier to recall your most relevant achievements and skills.

Track your duties, projects and results.

Keep a list of professional development activities you've participated in.
List the training you've completed.

Note your volunteer work.

File your performance reviews and the written letters and emails you receive that note your performance.

Use this success journal to track your strengths and successes and also to affirm your wonderful qualities as well. All of us need to boost our confidence and self esteem from time to time. Having a list of objective strengths and accomplishments can do a lot to improve your motivation and belief in your abilities.

Build and maintain a professional network.
Make sure that you develop good relationships with people both within and outside your organization. These people will be invaluable as the landscape of work changes. They can bring you along with them as they weather changes, and can provide opportunities when your current position looks uncertain. When you add a mentor or two to your network, you have the added bonus of learning new skills, technologies and strategies that will help you move your career in the direction you want.

Collect business cards.

Keep track of former bosses and colleagues.

Join professional networking associations.

Participate in a wide range of activities and build relationships beyond your current career or industry.

Scan the environment.
Be aware of changes and trends in the economy, your profession and the industry you are in. No one can accurately predict the future; however stay ahead of the crowd by keeping yourself informed, and choosing to work in industries – and for employers – that have long-term sustainability.

Keep track of business trends by reading a good newspaper and the industry press.

Complete a PEST analysis for your industry and others you are interested in.
Analyze the attractiveness of your company using Porter's Five Forces and USP Analysis.

Back your hunches and analysis with action. If you think your company or industry is in trouble, it's best to get out while the going's good!

Overall, avoid industries and companies that are on a downward slide. Being an expert in a dying field may provide a niche strategy into the medium term; however, you will eventually have to leave. It is better to prepare now.

Keep a clear career path open.
You may be fortunate enough to be in an organization where there's a clear and attractive career path ahead of you. For many, this will not be the case. This may not be a problem if you're in a fast growth industry – if you're good at what you do, opportunities will most-likely appear with alarming regularity. However if you're in a slow growth industry or are one in decline, then this is a problem: There may be no onward path, and development may be blocked, however hard you work. This will lead to frustration, boredom and, in the long term, failure to achieve your potential.

This is where you need to review your options and take action to unblock your career, even if it means a job- or career-change. See our article on Career Planning to find out how to do this.

Develop resilience.
Because the future is uncertain, you will probably encounter setbacks no matter how much you prepare and plan. People who will be successful are those with the ability to bounce back and consider such setbacks as learning experiences.

Evaluate and affirm your strengths on a regular basis.

Develop realistic and achievable goals, monitor your progress and identify what is holding you back.

Build your flexibility and maintain your enthusiasm despite what is happening around you.

All of these techniques can be very useful as you begin to plan and prepare for your future. And they all have in common the elements of risk management and career planning. You need to become good at both to secure your future career.

Key Points:
While your job description may not be relevant in the future, you can ensure the skills you bring to the table are. With some forethought and planning, you can take control of your future career today. The key is not so much in how skilled you are at predicting what will happen, it is in how attuned you are to the early indications of change.

When you realize that change is constant and you are constantly planning so you stay ahead of the game, you will find yourself in a great position to recognize and capitalize on the opportunities that present themselves.

This article is supported by Dianna Podmoroff of the Mind Tools Career Excellence Club. To contact Dianna and comment on this article, simply email Customer.Helpdesk@mindtools.com

What if your spouse thinks you should forget about Network Marketing?

I want to share a fantastic article I read tonight in Michael Oliver's newsletter.

Michael is the author of How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety or Losing Your Friends.

If you've been thinking of going into Network Marketing and your spouse doesn't exactly share your enthusiasm, this article's for you.

Have A Contract With Yourself To Be 1000% Responsible For You And Your Own Success

Here is a question of the type I get on a regular basis from people who struggle with many external influences in their lives.

My (spouse) thinks I should just get a real job and forget about Network Marketing. He is getting tired of me ordering different plans and really not finding one that works. There is something about it that really appeals to me and I am always looking to see what I can find. I know this will work and I’m just not ready to give up on it yet. I would appreciate any information you can give me. Hope to hear from you soon.- LW, St Elmo, IL

My response....

First. With regards to the different “plans” you talk about, ask yourself these questions...
What part or parts of the different plans you have been using and rejecting, are not working for you?
What parts of them are working.

Write your answers down in two columns... "What works for me" - "What doesn't work for me". If what isn't working outweighs what is, then search for a plan that has got more of what is working. Then STICK to it!

Second. Sticking to it requires discipline, a word which many define as too restrictive and the opposite to freedom. HOWEVER, like most conventional thinking – this is simply NOT true!
With discipline comes freedom.

For example - Nature disciplines itself and we are every much a part of nature as the trees that grow and even the seasons. Nature doesn’t decide to skip a season because something more interesting comes along. It might be late or early on occasion. The seasons might even vary as to temperatures etc.

But the seasons still turn up!

Heed the quote; “It was character that got us out of bed, commitment that moved us into action, and discipline that enabled us to follow through.”

Are YOU Working?
The critical questions to ask is yourself is... "Am I working?"

By that I mean....
Are you willing to invest the time in learning how to communicate with people?
Do you have a real desire to change your present circumstances?
Do you have the commitment to take action, day in day out, to achieve your desire by talking with people every day – seeing if you can help them get what they want so that you can ultimately get what you want?

As for your spouse telling you to get a job... the choice is yours. You can either settle for the so called security of a regular paycheck by working for someone else. Or you can establish your own security by taking your own path to financial, personal, mental and spiritual freedom.

In my book "How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety Or Losing Your Friends!" I include this comment…
"Find your own truth, by shedding the truths of others that prevent you from having the freedom and abundance that is your universal right."

Perhaps you could ask your spouse for help in this. I'm sure your spouse is just as interested as you are in wanting you to be successful and happy!

There is no right or wrong to whatever you do. The secret is to find what FEELS right for you and then ACT on it... taking 1000% responsibility for your own success allowing no one to get in the way.

What The Mind Can Believe, It Can Achieve

Is it possible to become successful just by thinking about it?
Research has proven that the mind cannot tell the difference between a real occurrence and one that has been well-imagined. The moment you experience an event vividly in your imagination it is recorded as experience.

Mental Rehearsal
Picture this... Liu Chi Kung, a world-class pianist in the late 1950's, was imprisoned during the Cultural Revolution in China . After seven years without a piano he immediately resumed his concert tour. His fans said he played better than ever and wondered how this was possible. Kung said, 'I rehearsed every piece I had ever played, note by note, in my mind.'

Mental rehearsal, or the process of visualization, can give you a competitive edge. Olympic athletes have used it in training for years and it works not only in sports but for every goal you set.

Picture This
The next time you make a presentation, book an important appointment, or attempt a challenge outside your comfort zone, gain the edge. Practice mental rehearsal beforehand. You can think your way to success. You don't need any special tools, it doesn't cost anything, and you can begin right now.

Picture that!

From Coaching Compass, newsletter of CoachTrainingAlliance

Reflection:

I've been thinking long and hard about this one.
On an intellectual level, I 'know' that positive thinking brings positive results, that As A Man Thinketh, So Is He, The Law of Attraction etc etc.
But I've rarely endeavoured to put this principle in practice.

What I've continually struggled with is this: is there a moral or spiritual element to engaging in such a process?
Should there be a good cause, a noble purpose, before I apply positive thinking to something?
Do I even need to go there?

The more I think about it, the stronger a particular thought has presented itself to me: the principle itself, that Positive Thinking Brings Positive Results, is a universal law.
It applies to all things, all situations and all people.
Because it is a universal law, it will always work if applied correctly.
Because it is a universal law, my feelings about it are irrelevant.
Because it is a universal law, it is available and accessible to all.

The only thing that is holding me back from experiencing possible positive outcomes - is me.

History, anecdotal evidence and my own experience illustrate the dramatic outcomes or missed opportunities that result from exercise of the principle.
Think you can - and events, people and resources will come together to make it happen.
Think you can't - and you subconsciously push the positive outcome away.

On its own, the principle is morally and spiritually neutral.
But I can make it moral and spiritual by choosing to exercise it for a good cause or a noble purpose.
So because this principle is neutral and can be used for good or bad, I have a moral responsibility as a thinking, spiritually conscious person and a practising Christian, to apply the principle responsibly.

But the fundamental principle remains unchanged: ask, and you shall receive.