Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Warming Up To Cold Calls

I hate cold calls. Especially if they're from people trying to demo the newest vacuum cleaner, financial/insurance product or asking me personal questions about my household.

That is why I would not wish it on anybody else. It's also what makes being self-employed so hard.

Let's face it. You can't sit home all day expecting the phone to ring off the hook, or for dream jobs to just drop into your email inbox. All the marketing gurus (and my business friends as well) recommend networking and making cold calls.

The thought leaves me cold. If I wouldn't wish it on anyone else, why would I want to be the one to make the call and bug a stranger?

Again the gurus explain: For every 10 prospects you call, 3 may be willing to meet up, and 1 may eventually close a deal with you. Logic? The more calls you make, the greater the likelihood of your making a sale.

Sounds simple, except that I am exceptionally thin-skinned and fear rejection of any kind....even from someone I've never met.

So what's a starving writer to do?

This morning, I finally (reluctantly) picked up the phone. Except it wasn't really a cold call. A contact had already paved the way (it's called a lead) by giving me a name and number to call. All I had to do was introduce myself and tell him my contact had recommended me to call him.

It worked like a charm. While I didn't close any sale, I got a signpost of sorts: another name and email address, and confirmation that my services were in demand.

For a start, that's good enough for me.

Now to work my way down the list.

Monday, December 26, 2005

The Burden Of Gift Giving

Lest you think I am a Scrooge who hates making others happy through gift-giving, let me explain.

It is not the giving itself but the whole process of not knowing that is so stressful - having to blindly guess a recipient's tastes and preferences (particularly when the recipient is a child), having to tread that delicate balance between overspending and being considered a cheapskate, not knowing if it's appropriate to recycle a gift, worrying about buying something wholly inappropriate or useless...

Last Christmas, I wisely spent the months before planning my list of what to buy, and completely avoided the last-minute desperate rush for gifts.

This year has been a lean year as our family has been living on one income for the past 3 months, and I wanted to spend as little as possible. Still, it was impossible to get away with being minimalist. As far as our small group is concerned, the kids will always get their presents, even if the adults don't. So we bought the obligatory gift exchange present for one other couple, and agonized over what to get for the already-saturated-with-more-toys-than-necessary little ones.

In the end, I still had to make that desperate last-minute stop at a stationery store to put something decent together for the little girl in our group whom I hadn't planned to buy anything for because her whole family had been stationed overseas and were back for the hols for one week.

The whole thing fell apart when I found myself wrapping, taping and scribbling in the back seat on our way to the Christmas lunch for the small group. I grumbled no end and was frightfully snappy with my husband and daughter. That of course took away the joy of the season, but I was feeling as low as I possibly could, and having to keep up a chirpy front before the others was too much.

The good thing is: at least my extended family allowed me to get away with giving homemade choc chip cookies this year. And Mum got a calendar that I created off MS Publisher with a few choice photos of her granddaughter. Cost: $1.90 (for lamination, which was done at the neighbourhood stationery store).

'Tis the season to start planning next year's Christmas gift list. Maybe everyone will get gifts of homemade goodies. Time to take down those dusty recipe books from the shelf.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Is Working From Home For Me?

I have a nagging suspicion that working from home requires a great deal more self-discipline than I possess right now.

Besides getting sidetracked by all the interesting fluff on the Net, my other big challenge is focussing on the important people in my life, such as my daughter.

Despite starting out with good intentions of devoting evenings exclusively to being with her, I am finding her a distraction and disruption when I need to send out an email or do some work that involves being online.

This evening was a perfect example of a perfect disaster.

3-year-olds are notoriously demanding, and my little girl is no different. While I was engrossed in crafting my most inspired invitation letter ever, she insisted on sitting on my lap (thus blocking my view of the monitor) and repeatedly asking for her milk.

"Wait till I finish this email," said I.

"No...I want it NOW!"

That was the exact same moment the computer chose to crash... just before I pressed "Send"!

I was so furious at the loss of my hard work that I took out my anger on her, treating her rather roughly, which caused the poor girl to burst into tears. That led to my spouse accusing me of putting work before my little girl. My own feelings of remorse coupled with his rebuke were altogether too much to bear. Still sulking, I brought her downstairs to make her her favourite nightcap.

She was asleep in minutes after finishing the bottle, and I was again able to get back to work. I should have just put her to bed and then got on with my work.

On reflection, I realize I've lost something invaluable and immeasurable and which can never be regained (save with a good deal of hard work): the goodwill of a little girl, thanks to my selfishness and lack of self-control.

I'm ashamed to confess that this is not the first time. If I'm to maintain a close bond with my little girl, I will have to exert greater control over my time and emotions, and learn to welcome her into my world, rather than seeing her desire to be with me as an intrusion.

And you know what's worse?

This would never have happened if I weren't working from home.

So is being a WAHM for me?
Or am I better off demarcating work and home clearly, like I used to as a member of the corporate world?
I wish I knew.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

When Being Speechless Is A Blessing

3 days ago, I lost my voice.

That was hard enough, as I had a networking meeting and 1-minute sales presentation to do. I ended up sitting through the session as a passive observer, with the blessings of my mentor.

However, as I was to find out, in life, there is always a reason for the situation we're in, even an unpleasant one.

After the meeting, the team got together to hear out one of the members (let's call her Nelly), who needed a sounding board for her views.

Nelly was troubled over her lack of visible success and lack of sustainable income.

According to my mentor, Nelly's problem was one quite common among small business owners, especially if they had never been in business before.

They start out enthusiastically, thinking they have found the perfect escape from the rigours of the corporate world. However, once they run into obstacles, they give up before they've had a chance to make a breakthrough, and move on to the next venture, and the next, and find the cycle repeating itself.

Nelly was a perfect example. She had left her stressful corporate job to be a home-based masseur. However, she was making barely enough to scrape by, much less supplement the family income. So she ventured into an MLM business, distributing noni juice. But she found the income generated unsatisfactory also. Now she was wondering if she should join a friend who had invited her to market Diamond Energy Water.

Her spouse was losing patience with her lack of focus. He told her he was giving her 6 months to try out the new venture, and if she failed, she would have to return to the corporate world and get a "proper" job.

Her dilemma: Should she even try out the new venture? Was she even suited to the business world? Would she be better off just sticking with any old corporate job that came along?

I say it was just as well I had lost my voice that day. Otherwise, I would have lost the opportunity to really listen (which is very hard for me, because I get sidetracked easily). Everyone had something to say, but the most powerful contribution came from my mentor, who had just one question for Nelly.

"What do you really want for yourself?"

And one solution: "You have to focus."

She went on to dissect Nelly's dilemma. Nelly, she felt, is a visual person (in NLP lingo) who needs to see to believe. She has to learn to do the reverse: to believe that she will see (results, in this case). She also needs to focus on doing one thing well, whether it be massage or selling health products, instead of channelling her energies all over the place.

I felt as if my mentor were speaking to me.

On bad days, I ask myself what I'm doing, throwing away a legal career and trying to eke a living out of writing and career counselling.

Am I cut out for it?
What makes me think I'm good enough that people would want to pay me for my time?
What have I got to offer that others don't?
Am I doing too much?
What if my savings run out before I've established myself?

But I also know this:
If I do not risk everything now and try, I will never know if I could have succeeded or not.
And if I fail, so what? I can always move on to something else.
At worst, if my money runs out, I could go back to the law.

Or some job.

Any job.

Well, almost. :p

Friday, December 16, 2005

A Ray of Hope

I started this morning in a panic, trying to do too many things at once and wondering, "What am I doing with my life?"

I've got so many to-do's on my wish list and not enough discipline to sit down and work out how best to get through them all, or even whether I should get through them all.

Each day's routine is a challenge. What shall I do today?
a) exercise?
b) visit the library?
c) work on the PC?
d) do something different, like go to the beach or the airport?
e) some, all or none of the above??

Is it possible to just be, and not have to worry that I'm wasting my time or making a wrong decision?

Then I have to remind myself: Life is short. Life is unpredictable. Don't sweat the small stuff.

Not when there's bigger stuff out there to worry about.

Just yesterday, we received news that a friend's sister had been diagnosed with breast cancer. She's a couple of years older than I am, a mother of three, and her youngest child is my daughter's age. I can relate to some of that.

Bad news tends to kickstart a mini-epiphany, and I tried to imagine myself in her shoes:
How would I respond?
Would I lose all faith in God?
Would I get depressed, bitter, angry?
How would my husband and little girl manage if Mummy got taken home early?
So our prayers are with my friend's sister and her family.

In the meantime, God has given me a life to live, to serve, to contribute. Not for myself alone, but for the betterment of others. Especially for those who can't, or won't, or don't know how to help themselves.

Like the lady who called just now seeking career advice. A dear friend had suggested she speak with me.

Her problem is not unique. She wants to leave her current organization, but isn't especially keen to join the one that's offered her a position (Strong Push + Weak Pull). She knows she needs a change, but she doesn't want to leave her comfort zone. Sound familiar?

I explained what I could do for her, and we agreed to meet up on Monday morning.

You know what makes me excited? This - knowing that I can really help her by sharing what I've learned from my own career coach, the resources I've investigated, and my personal, unique experience at making the comfort-zone leap.

No need to save the world. It's enough for me to save just ONE individual's self-esteem, and give her the affirmation and confidence she needs to make her own informed decisions.

Cheers!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

I Stared My Greatest Fear In The Face...

...and lived to tell the tale!

You know what scares me most? Striking up a conversation with strangers, especially if it's with the intention of influencing them to do something!

Like sharing my faith.

And cold calls for a cause, even a worthy one.

My"face" (very important in the Asian culture!) is the most precious thing in the world and losing it, e.g. by being snubbed or humiliated, would be the ultimate low.

This week though, I put aside my "face" concerns enough to:
1) Chat up a complete stranger while in her shop, and
2) Invite an acquaintance to visit the next meeting of the professional networking association that I belong to.

None of this would have happened if my team had not set an informal target for us to invite 2 persons each to subsequent meetings. After hearing how some members were making cold calls through Yahoo Classifieds and the Yellow Pages, I started feeling the pressure and began running down the names in my mobile address book to see who might likely be interested in attending the meetings.

COUP #1
While window shopping in the area after lunch, my friend and I walked into a shop that screamed NEW KID. There was the telltale Congratulations floral wreath, super-new paintwork and furnishings, and the fact that there was no one in the shop...aside from the owner, who greeted us effusively and appeared to have all the time in the world for us.

As we browsed, the owner struck up a conversation and I distinctly remember her lamenting how tough it is to be a new business owner. That was the cue I needed. I asked, "Would you like to meet other business owners and receive referrals for your business?" I then proceeded to explain what my association did and what it stood for.

The end result was that she said YES to my invitation to our next meeting!

I was so thrilled with the unexpected outcome you would've thought I'd won the national lottery. I could hardly believe someone would just accept my word at face value and agree to do something just because I asked, even though it's something I do all the time when others do the asking.

To ensure she didn't change her mind quickly, I followed up with a text message to her mobile that very afternoon, and she confirmed she would be coming for our meeting.

COUP #2
During coffee with an acquaintance that afternoon, I mentioned my involvement in the networking association. When I mooted the meet-business-owners-to-generate-referrals idea, she looked distinctly interested, and that again resulted in another YES. To make sure she knew we were serious in our networking efforts, I gave her a copy of our standard invitation letter (customised with her personal info) 2 days later when we met again. She looked impressed.

LESSONS LEARNT:

  • Anticipate the other person's needs, and pitch your case to meet those needs. In the case of the new business owner, she clearly saw the value of exchanging business referrals with other business owners. With my acquaintance who is in the financial planning line, networking is all part of a day's work.
  • Just ask. Plan your approach, take a deep breath and just do it. There's no substitute for learning by doing.
  • Don't let the contact grow cold. Keep yourself on the other person's radar screen if it's going to be some time before you meet again. Use different media (text messaging, e-mail, phone calls) and vary your content by pitching the subject from different but interesting angles.

Monday, December 12, 2005

A Desktop Miracle!

Tonight is one of those evenings when everything went right.

One, my desktop PC, which has been really erratic of late and was the main reason I bought a notebook, did NOT crash and did NOT require rebooting.

Two, a website that I had been having difficulty with for many months (www.jobsdb.com.sg) because of a repeated javascript error message miraculously resolved itself, and I could access EVERY SINGLE ONE of the ad links!

Three, the cursor did NOT freeze mid-transaction, like it's been doing almost every night for the past 2 weeks.

Thing is, since I don't know what I did or didn't do to contribute to this remarkable turn of events, I can't say future problems of a similar nature won't recur.

A sobering thought, but I'll just enjoy the miracle for the moment. Isn't that what miracles are for?

Thanks be to GOD! :-)

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Disastrous Financial Decisions

I seem to be doing nothing right these days.

Despite being on a subsistence allowance from my kind hubby and despite the dwindling balance in my savings account, I have persistently (or suicidally I should say) made purchasing decisions that I later regret.

Case in point: On Monday, I bought an ACER notebook at $2.5k from an electronics superstore, despite knowing that Dell offers notebooks at $2k and under on its website.

My justification? I was desperate. My PC had crashed and I needed a notebook to keep up with emails and possible business opportunities.

My hubby tried to console me by pointing out that you can't compare a Dell with an ACER; the latter comes with a CrystalBrite screen and is better for the eyes. All I can think of is that I could have saved myself $500 at least...

Another case in point:
I attended a dinner gathering tonight with classmates from a course I graduated from in October, without considering the impact on my pocket. The dinner (the main feature of which was chili crab, which I don't even eat as I've eczema and am allergic to crabs) came up to $40 per pax.

My reason for attending? Because I felt bad about saying no, and so I "persuaded" myself that it was important to network and introduce my new writing business to my classmates. I ended up doing a rather feeble presentation of my business and felt all the while that I was being a fraud as I could not even articulate my business convincingly.

No wonder Jesus said we cannot serve God and Mammon. The related proverb about money being a good servant and a bad master is probably true for me too.

Perhaps I've got it all wrong and need to get back to fundamentals, to "seek first the kingdom of GOD, and all these things (money? influence? success?) shall be added unto you".

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Broke and Petrified

I am finally paying the price for years of mindless spending.

It's been nearly 3 months since I quit my day job and I can't believe how fast my savings are being eaten up! Just because you're not working doesn't mean you don't have to spend. And I can justify every item. Well, almost.

  • Magazines - to study the trends and types of articles published, in case I want to send a query.
  • Coffee @ Starbucks/Coffee Bean - they have (paid) wireless access and I can work on my notebook there.
  • An ACER Aspire notebook - so I need not be confined to working from home.
  • Lunches out - I need a social life, don't I?
  • Subscriptions to professional organizations - for networking purposes; can't make money without money!
  • Courses - to keep learning and growing.
  • Gifts for friends & family - there's just no way to get out of this one!
  • Health supplements - I went a bit mad this time and bought from one friend who distributes USANA products and another who distributes BettaLife products.
  • Skincare products - this was from another friend who is an Amway distributor. (I'm a great friend, aren't I?)

Will I turn a corner soon and start earning more than enough $ to meet my expenses?

I desperately want to believe this is possible...

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Q&A: Must a freelancer register a business?

This is an interesting question. To my knowledge, the relevant authorities have never issued a formal position statement on this point.

What the Singapore Business Registration Act says is that every person must register with ACRA before he carries on business in Singapore. "Business" includes every form of trade, commerce, craftsmanship, calling, profession and any activity carried on for the purposes of gain, barring a list of exceptions and exemptions stated in the Act. The list does not include freelancers and independent contractors. Therefore, it must mean that they are required to register.

Have a look here: http://statutes.agc.gov.sg/

Whether the authority actively enforces this interpretation is a matter of policy.

Practically speaking, a freelancer has nothing to lose and everything to gain by registering. It is tempting to want to operate under the radar, especially when one is starting out and not certain of how viable the business will be.

However, it is safe to say that most clients would be more comfortable dealing with a business entity, as the fact of registration lends credibility and an assurance that the owner is acting within the parameters of the law and has nothing to hide.

Imagine for one moment that you have just met 2 freelance writers, and their business cards are side by side before you. One has just the name and contacts of the individual and the designation "Freelance Writer". The other has these details plus the business name, business registration number, and a corporate website address. Which person are you more likely to follow up on?

From Employee to Business Owner

On 2 Dec 2005, I completed my comfort-zone leap: I became a business owner!

Registering the business was easy enough. First, I did a couple of pre-registration checks on www.acra.gov.sg, the website of the authority that registers business entities (ACRA), and www.business.gov.sg, the UN 2005 Public Service Award-winning one-stop website for businesses.

I also checked out www.hdb.gov.sg to see how to register my HDB flat as a home office, as I intend to work primarily from home.

When I was satisfied that no other registered entity had a name similar to the one I had in mind, I registered the business using the shopping cart facility in www.business.gov.sg and printed several copies of the Instant Information business profile of my new start-up from the URL sent to me by ACRA. The profile is required for official dealings with other agencies, e.g. to set up a bank account for my business.

The next day, I surfed the Net for domain name registrars for my future corporate website. I chose one off the first page of searches from Google: Melbourne IT (www.melbourneit.com.au). A couple of clicks and US$70 later, I am the proud owner of the yet-to-be-built www.beyondprint.biz, for the next 2 years. Technology is beautiful!

As I said, setting up is the easy part. The challenge now is to go out and find sustainable business to make my dream of becoming a well-fed writer come true. To that end, I've decided to commit Tue mornings to BNI breakfast meetings and see how things go from there.

Cheers!

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Networking your way to more business

This morning, I dragged myself out of bed to attend a 7.30 am session for a soon-to-be-launched chapter of a global networking organization, Business Network International. This is my 2nd networking session in 2 weeks - a personal record for a born wallflower!

Aside from the usual exchange of business cards and word-of-mouth referrals, this organization is interesting because it functions in small groups limited to one member per profession. This means that if Chapter X already has a member who is an insurance agent, another insurance agent cannot join that chapter. He or she must look for another chapter where the insurance industry is not yet represented. The idea is to minimize conflict of interest. Not a bad business idea.

For more info on the organization, check out www.bni.com.sg. Meetings are weekly affairs held in the CBD area. Late risers need not apply. ;)

If you prefer to network among ladies only, a good organization to explore would be the Singapore Business & Professional Women's Association. They run networking events, talks and fundraising-for-a-good-cause activities. They even give away scholarship money to deserving but needy students. Have a look at www.sbpwa.org.sg.

As to the benefits of organized networking, I can attest that it definitely is not a waste of time. Just today, I garnered several leads for possible business collaborations. Of course, it remains to be seen what will come of them, but the point is, if I hadn't gone, I wouldn't even have obtained those leads. Still, it would be nice if they could have meetings at a saner time...yawn....

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Hello World!

Why 'Living In Transition'?
Cos that's what I'm doing right now. Just left something solid and comfortable to move on to something else. That's how life works isn't it? First School, then Work, Family, Retirement. Somewhere in between Work & Family, I decided it was time to do something different with my life, and that time is NOW, or I might wake up one day and find it's too late to try something new because of age or infirmity.

I like what Howard Schultz, Starbucks CEO, says in his book Pour Your Heart Into It: How Starbucks Built A Company One Cup At A Time -
"It's one thing to dream, but when the moment is right, you've got to be willing to leave what's familiar and go out to find your own sound."

Interestingly, I first came across this concept of finding your own "sound" in Stephen Covey's latest book, The 8th Habit. He talks about finding your own "voice" and using it to influence others.

This is a concept that really appeals to me right now. I am working hard to get past that difficult first stage so that I can live this way for a long time without being forced to go back to a full-time day job. It means a lot to me to succeed at my dreams, because I can then become a testimony for other seekers. To paraphrase youth champion Elim Chew, you don't succeed just for yourself. You succeed so you have something to give back to others.

My twin passions: Writing...

Right now, I have 2 passions: Writing and Counselling. I've loved writing since I was in school. Rhyming verse, short stories, songs, I had great fun with all of them.... till my late teens, when the gift mysteriously dried up. Since then, I've not written a single song or poem that I truly like! I like to think I was given that gift for a reason - to help me cope with that period of my life when I needed it most.

Now, I'm into commercial copywriting, corporate literature, ghostwriting, editing and proofreading. (I might be what some call anal-retentive; I can't let a piece pass without looking out for possible typos!) How did I get into this? Through referrals. I was able to try out copyediting, proofreading, translation for commercial ads, and I decided I liked it enough to keep at it.

...And counselling/befriending/nurturing/encouraging/coaching
In my old workplace, I was a popular choice whenever someone had a work issue or a relationship issue to get off their chests. I've been told I'm a good listener and I demonstrate empathy. All I know is I enjoy helping people voice their dreams and fears and helping them get past barriers (self- or others-imposed) that are keeping them from being happy, balanced, contributing individuals. My mum has a different take on it though - when I was in school, I used to get a lot of calls from friends who just wanted to chat about problems they had, and my mum would accuse me of being a busybody and nag me to get back to my books.

I was privileged to attend the first-ever NUS Career Counselling Conference in May, and to lap up all the wisdom of these career counselling academics from the University of Columbia-Missouri. That was heady in itself, but in July, I had an even more wonderful time at Worklife Asia's Career Development & Performance Coaching Certification Program. It was a 3-day intensive program and cost a lot of money, but I believe knowledge is an investment that pays off immeasurable dividends. I'm glad I had the opportunities I had to talk to people in the industry (a relatively new one in Singapore) and to explore the idea of joining them someday.

Resources I find particularly helpful are The Career Counselor's Handbook (Figler and Bolles) and What Colour Is Your Parachute? (Bolles) Best of all, they're available at the library so I can enjoy a cuppa (courtesy of the pre-paid Cool Card or Beverage Card) while reading up on transferable skills, the Flower diagram and the RIASEC code.

Why career counselling in particular?
Cos it's all about helping people look towards the future, instead of staying trapped and victimized by their pasts. Lots of people need guidance about course options and career choices, whether they're young and impressionable (especially so!) or in between jobs. Who knows, I might have taken a different path had I received career guidance as a student!

In the meantime, I practise my skills on friends and anyone who's interested. People are always keen to talk about themselves, to know where their strengths are and what jobs they can consider. I think just the idea of IMAGINING a different lifestyle - with all the myriad different possibilities - is an adventure in itself.

Why did I quit?
I was well-paid and well-respected in my old workplace. I had made some really good friends. It was a comfortable environment to be in. But it wasn't enough. The routine was getting painful. I wasn't playing to my strengths and I was starting to feel like a fraud. I was like the proverbial duck, all cool and calm on the exterior but paddling furiously underwater. Time poverty was another major issue. I had so many other interests and no time to pursue them because after-work hours were for family.

But to make that comfort zone leap, I had to mentally let go of the FEAR. Fear of not having enough and possibly having to downgrade. Fear of living on one income. Fear of what my folks might say. Fear of what peers might think. Fear of making a wrong move and being told, "See? I told you so."

The greatest was the not-enough-money fear. I've always been a spender, and have only recently started investing in unit trusts (I know, the returns can't compare with stocks, but let's do this slowly). I haven't got 6 months' savings set aside like the experts recommend. Thanks to years of aimless and impulsive spending and lack of clear financial goals, my bank statement is a personal embarrassment.

But you know what they say about being at the bottom; the only way is UP!

For now, I aim to keep expenses to a minimum. I let my live-in maid go when her contract ended, and when my part-time maid decided to leave too, I didn't rush to find a replacement. There will be no expensive facials/manicures/pedicures/massages once my prepaid packages run out. Instead, I plan to make do with OTC skincare products and to spend more time exercising to get that natural glow.

What got me out of my rut?
A very simple thought. Basically, I asked myself, if I didn't make a change now, then when? When I'm 45? 55? 62? When I'm too old, too weak, too infirm? The answer was obvious.

On my way to a new life
So here I am, out on a wing and a prayer, launching my career as a freelance writer (for starters). I bought Peter Bowerman's excellent e-book The Well-Fed Writer, and reactivated my distance writing course with The Writers Bureau, Manchester, UK.

I've also started actively networking for clients, something I've never done nor had a need to do. Meeting strangers is scary enough for a wallflower like me. Asking them for business? That's worse. But a gal's gotta live. As they say, if you don't believe in yourself, who will?

The other day, I attended my first networking function and handed out some business cards (which I'd designed myself using MS Publisher and printed off my Brother MFC!). Just the act of handing out those cards validated my new calling. And from the responses I got when I introduced myself as a freelance writer, it looks like lots of businesses out there need help with their writing needs. Just what I need!

Cheers.