Web Page of Yen the Artist

My friend and classmate Yen, a frustrated lawyer-cum-budding artist, has set up a web page dedicated to her body of artwork.

It's amazing stuff.

I don't know much about art myself, but just looking at her interpretations of the Mornington Peninsula in VIC and her explanation about why she loves to paint, I have learnt something about human creativity and how art can lift us above the mediocrity of our daily routines.

Check out her site and do pass on the link to friends who love art.

Blog Posts

Just did a quick count of my blog posts.

I've gone over the magical 1,000!

My five blogs as of today have got 1,017 posts in total.

Awesome.

Why You Should Experiment

If you do not experiment, learn from the experiment, apply the learning, and assimilate the entire process, what else can you do except spend your life banging your head against the imaginary barriers of your own incompetence?

Robert Fritz, The Path of Least Resistance

HXUCA AGM 2008

At the congregational meeting last Sunday, our pastor and the coordinators of HXUCA's various outreach activities tabled their reports.

The reports - especially the Minister's - made for exciting reading. I got the sense that I was caught up in something bigger, something significant, that is about to happen in HXUCA.

For instance, 2009 is going to be the year of the Big Idea. The main objective is to go deeper into the pastor's Sunday sermon during the week through various Bible study and prayer groups.

I think that is a very good idea. So many times I've walked out of Sunday Service thinking, "That was a really good sermon", and that was that. Monday came around and with it the usual busyness that overwhelms. Now there'll be opportunities to explore and ask questions and reflect in an intentional way with like-minded brothers and sisters.

Another thing we talked about was the community impact of HXUCA's various outreach projects. As someone who is not personally involved, it is wonderful to hear of how individuals in our community have been touched because of the simple availability of the Take 2 Opp Shop that not only lets people buy second-hand goods at affordable prices, but gives distressed persons a chance to talk with our pastor when they wander through the doors of the church on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

We also heard some interesting feedback from the vendors of our monthly Car Boot Sales (CBS). They told the CBS coordinators that they feel more appreciated and taken care of at our CBS than at any other craft market in the neighbourhood. Wow.

It's lovely that our CBS coordinators have gone out of their way to make the vendors (most of whom are not HXUCA attendees) feel welcome. I love going to craft markets just to see what's out there, but I've never thought about what the experience might be like for the folks behind the display tables. Next time I'll remember to make an effort to strike up meaningful conversations with the vendors.

HOSPITALITY is undoubtedly HXUCA's greatest gift to the community. The ladies and gents who help out with the Opp Shop, bookshop, CBS and monthly Working Bees do an incredible amount of unpaid work week after week without any guarantee that their efforts will be appreciated and without knowing if their projects will touch the lives of those outside the church family. Well, now we know. Their work matters very much.

On the subject of hospitality, it is interesting that our pastor is raising the bar on what he wants to see HXUCA do in the new year. His report puts it so well that I am just going to lift the relevant extracts.

"I cannot stress strongly enough that the hardest thing in growing a church is not geting people through the front doors, it is finding a way of preventing the flow of people out the back door. This is very much dependent on each of us.

If people are to stay, they will choose to because they sense they belong; that they are welcome and that there are meaningful relationships to be enjoyed here...It will be your practice of welcome and fellowship that will cause people to stick.

I want to challenge every person associated with Hoppers Crossing Uniting Church to make a real effort in this regard. From children to youth and on into the adult church we are too comfortable with ourselves and must allow our interest and friendship groups to be expanded.

...Each of us can do a very simple thing. Just by being here at the church during the times of activity on Sunday, Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday you can do a great and important thing.

People need to see and feel the church. They won't do this through the building, they can only do it through the body."

Amen to that.

Choose Something Other Than Your Default Mode

From Coaching Compass newsletter

Coaching Outside the Box
by David Krueger MD

Ben Fletcher at the University of Hertfordshire in the United Kingdom devised a study to get people to break their usual habits. Each day the subjects picked a different option from poles of contrasting behaviors -- lively/quiet, introvert/extrovert, reactive/proactive -- and behaved according to this assignment.

So an introverted person, for example, would act as an extrovert for an entire day. Additionally, twice weekly, they had to stretch to behave in a way outside their usual life pattern – eating or reading something they would never have done.

What do you think was the biggest change in the group?

The remarkable finding was that after four months, the subjects had lost an average of eleven pounds. And six months later, almost all had kept the weight off; some continued to lose weight. This was not a diet, but a study focusing on change and its impact.

The Underlying Principle
Requiring people to change routine behavior makes them actually think about decisions rather than habitually choosing a default mode without consideration. In having to actually process decisions actively, they exercised their choice and decision-making abilities, extending to other choices such as what to eat, and what not to. Once becoming aware of actively making choices, they could decide what’s in their best interest.

“The box” most of us are in is the result of programming and conditioning. And it is self-created in adulthood.

Recognizing yourself as the author, the creator of your story challenges an assumed model and leads to the deeper question, “How do I create something else instead?”

And, “What will the ‘something else’ be?”

PS. I admire the intent behind the experiment. The results are certainly worth exploring in the context of helping individuals make significant changes in their lives. However, I would not restrict myself to being the "author" and "creator" of my "story". As a God-believer, I know that ultimately, it is He who is Author and Creator. I am only author and creator to the extent that I exercise my God-given ability to make choices and decisions about how I live my life.

Treat Every Moment As If It's Our Last

From an article in the Oct 2008 issue of the Methodist News 卫理之声：

昨天傍晚幼弟长炎来电话告知我们所亲爱的吴武玲姐妹已于昨午四时蒙主归天。
心中难过，想到昨天在电话中为她祷告时，她的声音仍然满有力量， 没想到隔天就归天，更提醒我们当趁健康时竭力多作主工， 以免空手见主。

Let's use the time when we are healthy and active to do more good works in the name of Christ, so that we will not be caught empty-handed when we are called home unexpectedly.

The Courage of Self-Belief

Oscar-winning Australian designer Catherine Martin has some words of wisdom for people who choose the creative path.

"I feel proud of the work we've done, proud that I managed to do it, and it's up to everyone else now to judge whether it's good, bad or indifferent. Some people may like it and others might not, but you have to accept that if you're going to pursue a more risky path."

On the importance of passion:

"I'm in it for the journey, and I don't mind a few ups and downs...Success can't be the only reason you do something like this. You've got to like the process and the people and enjoy going to work each day; otherwise it's a very lonely, frustrating and unsatisfying game."

Great career advice and a good reminder to understand the "why" behind why we choose the work we do.

Thoughts On Barack Obama

I consider myself politically uninformed and apathetic, but Barack Obama's election victory speech on 6 Nov has awakened something in me. 

I am inspired by his ability to say the sorts of things that can rouse ordinary people to action. ("Yes we can")

I am impressed by the sincere and unreserved praise and acknowledgment he gave all who helped him.

I love the orderly, professional look-and-feel of his web site.

I get the sense (from things said about him by his team and those who know him) that he is much loved and respected and his supporters would follow him anywhere.

I respect his courage in making that detour to visit his ailing granny in the heat of the election.

I am amazed at how he astutely turned something we all use and take for granted - the Internet - into a platform to reach so many Americans across racial, age and status divides. There is no doubt the effectiveness of his Internet campaign helped deliver him the White House.

It reinforces my belief in the power of man to change his destiny and to rise to greatness - with the blessing of God.

"This victory alone is not the change we seek – it is only the chance for us to make that change.  And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were.  It cannot happen without you."

"And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn – I may not have won your vote, but I hear your voices, I need your help, and I will be your President too. "

Cancer Blog

A friend sent me this link.

It's a blog by a mother of two who is undergoing chemo and who is very realistic about her chances of survival.

It's raw, honest, humorous and sometimes confronting.

I'm reminded of Mitch Albom's Tuesdays With Morrie.

Bring on the tissues.

The Anatomy of a Calling

How do you find your calling in life?

This is the story of how one man found his.

"In my experience of God's calling, I have learned that more important than our commitment to our calling is our commitment to the One who calls us."

- Dr Robert Solomon, Bishop of The Methodist Church in Singapore (2000 to present)

On Using Our Gifts

After a 2-month break, I rejoined the musos for band practice last night.

It has been "easy" to skip Thu night practices. There's always one thing or another happening at home. Hubby gets home late, so I can't hand over and go for prac. Or J gets sick. Or the girls get clingy. Sometimes I just want to enjoy some family time.

It's good to be back.

I still wonder if my role as keyboardist isn't somewhat redundant when we already have an extremely versatile and gifted pianist who's also our de facto music director. Lately, the guitarist has taken on a bassist role using a separate keyboard as well.

While I've got the liberty to be as creative as I want with the organ and the keyboard that have been placed at my disposal, my skills aren't yet up to that level. So I tend to stick with what is safe and known - Pan Flute/Synth Strings for slow songs, Fantasia for fast songs. Sometimes I let go a little and experiment with different buttons just to hear the effects. Most of them work out well. Last night, I tried a button I'd never used before and the band leader went something like "Wow! How'd you do that? How do you know what button to press?"

To which the music director replied, "Cos we're musicians, that's why!"

I smiled. It's never that easy or obvious for me, so I would never dare to make such a bold statement.

My own interpretation is this. When God gives you a gift and you use it actively as an expression of who you are, you sometimes accomplish more than what you or someone else might have expected or imagined.

I do not know why God has given me the gift of music. I do not need an answer. I know I'm blessed to be a blessing, and that when I bless others, I will experience the deeper joy and fulfillment that come from living my God-given purpose.

The sense of inadequacy from not knowing enough and not being good enough may be what God uses to keep me in a right relationship with Him, so that I always remember who is the true Gift Giver, and who is the Steward.

Job Action Day 2008

QuintCareers has declared Nov. 3, 2008, Job Action Day worldwide -- a day for job-seekers and workers to confront the current economic crisis head-on and take action steps to improve their careers.

Here's what JAD is about in a nutshell - "To rally those who have lost their jobs or are facing possible job loss in the current devastated economic climate, Job Action Day 2008 aims to empower workers and job-seekers to take proactive steps to shore up their job and career outlook...

Our challenge to you...is to ask you to do at least ONE proactive thing TODAY, Job Action Day 2008, to improve your job and/or career situation.

Whether you update your resume, develop a backup plan in case of job loss, or add contacts to your network, take at least one action Today for Job Action Day."

Action Challenge
What one proactive thing can you do today to improve your career situation?

Are You A Quality Worker?

This extract from a post on the Trump University blog reiterates 2 things I passionately believe in and practise: (1) the importance of keeping our skills and knowledge current; (2) if you're unhappy with your career situation, do something about it!

Executive search firm Robert Half International, recently performed a study where they surveyed over 4000 finance and human resource managers in 20 different countries and the majority said they are having trouble finding skilled candidates to fill their high level accounting and finance positions. It also showed that when they do find one, the pressure is on them to find creative ways to retain them and keep them happy.

What this should tell people is that quality companies are needing quality people and are willing to pay them handsomely! If you are unhappy with your current job situation, do something about it. Start by bettering yourself and your skill set CONSTANTLY. Keep your education current. Take webinars and business classes in your field of expertise to keep abreast of cutting edge ideas and opportunities to impress any possible employers.

The Hardest Thing

The greatest challenges before us in the next two years are not getting the manse finished, not designing and rebuilding the church, but enabling all of us to become motivated in the great opportunity we have to serve God together, each of us doing our bit to achieve God's will.

The hardest thing for each of us is not the doing of the task, but deciding first of all that TODAY is the day when I will make myself available to serve.

Pastor Paul Blacker, Crossfire (26 October 2008)

Lending To The World's Poorest

I was reading a one-of-a-kind blog post today and it gave me an idea.

How's this for a unique Christmas gift - make a microloan to a poor entrepreneur in the developing world.

The idea is not new. Think Dr Mohamed Yunus and Grameen Bank.

But Kiva.org is the first of its kind. It uses the power of the Web to connect small lenders like you and me directly to real individuals who need the money, who know what to do with it, but whom banks won't lend to.

For as little as US$25, you can change lives.

As the borrower repays the loan, you get your money back.

What a powerful and sustainable way to lift someone out of poverty.

How's that for a Christmas gift that keeps on giving?

Read on about how Kiva.org has inspired Ken Evoy.

What Focus Means

I like this definition of "focus" that I picked up in Why We Want You To Be Rich: Two Men, One Message by Robert Kiyosaki and Donald Trump.

F = Follow
O = One
C = Course
U = Until
S = Successful

Follow One Course Until Successful.

RK shares that he applied this wisdom to his research into real estate, bonds and IPOs.

When he invested in real estate, he continued until he was successful.

When he wanted to learn about bonds, he invested in them until he was successful. Once he was successful, he decided that he did not like bonds and so he does not invest in them anymore.

He has taken two companies successfully from startups to IPOs and made millions. He succeeded, but then he decided he did not want to go through the process anymore.

Today, RK still prefers real estate.

When you think about it, it makes sense to focus. You shut out everything else that distracts and pour all your energies into doing one thing well. If that thing fails despite your best efforts and intentions, you know it's not right for you and you can move on.

But if you only put in 20% in Project X because you are also trying to manage Projects Y and Z and X fails, how will you know for sure what caused the failure?

The Entitlement Mentality

In the book Why We Want You To Be Rich - Two Men, One Message, Robert Kiyosaki and Donald Trump share their concern that Americans have become complacent.

People have come to expect the government to handle their problems and fix the future. Rich and poor alike expect government handouts. Big corporations are subsidized by the government. Farms and ranches would close down but for government handouts. The President of the US and members of the House and Senate expect retirement benefits from the government.

At the time of publication (2006), Social Security was in debt $10 trillion and Medicare, $62 trillion. It was projected that in a few years' time, the first of 75 million baby boomers would retire...and expect their government pension checks.

2 years on, the subprime crisis has thrown America into even greater financial straits. In such circumstances, how can the government possibly afford to take care of 75 million retirees?

The authors point out that the cause of this problem - our lack of financial resources - lies in a lack of financial education.

We have got to stop blaming others and expecting others to save us from the consequences of our own poor choices.

We have to start taking charge of our own situations.

We need to be part of the solution, not part of the problem.

To do that, we need to invest in our minds - our greatest asset.

Instead of relying on financial advisors or accepting unquestioningly the wisdom of the herd, we should take the time and effort to gain understanding.

Here are just a few suggestions from the book on the knowledge and understanding that we need to acquire:

• why the rich get richer
• the three types of investor and which one we are
• the four CASHFLOW quadrants, the values they represent and which quadrant we really want to belong in
• the difference between a saver and an investor
• the power of leverage
• good debt vs bad debt
• the financial challenges facing the US and the rest of the world and how they came about
• the history of the world
• the role of India and China in the world economy
• why diversification is not necessarily good financial advice
• why the middle class in America is shrinking

Work-Life Balance for an Actress turned SAHM

What's it like to be a SAHM after spending most of your professional life as an actress?

Aussie actress Rachael Beck, who's 37 and has a daughter the same age as J, is very honest about her struggle.

"I definitely wanted to be home with her for the first two years. It (motherhood) has gone from wonderment to exhaustion to 'I can't cope' to 'I'm on top of the world' - the absolute gamut. I don't think any mother really copes, and anyone who says they cope is telling a fib. 

It is such a life-changing thing in so many ways. It stretches and pulls you and tests you and makes you grow. 

It has deepened me as a woman and as a wife."

Of taking a professional break, she confesses, "I can't lie to you and say there haven't been times of frustration, of having to say 'no' to fabulous things that have been offered to me."

On the SAHM vs career woman debate, she is remarkably realistic.

"There are some women who are absolutely fine sitting at home with their children until they go to school, or giving up work. I'd had a lot of creative time and it's something that is so inherent in me and a part of my happiness that I am a better mother when I can balance that."

Lessons for the rest of us?

• Be true to yourself. Know what makes you fulfilled and what drives you batty. Find a way to channel your passions and strengths in ways that add to you as a person.
• Don't waste time feeling guilty because you aren't, or can't be, a SAHM. Do what you can, live with the consequences, and move on. Life isn't perfect.
• Acknowledge your uniqueness. Just because everyone else thinks being a SAHM or career woman is the right thing doesn't make it right for you. You are unique. Acknowledge your right to see things differently and to find your own balance.
• Whatever you choose, choose it for the right reasons and after careful consideration of all that is important to you and your loved ones. Then stick with your choice, knowing it is the best you can do in the circumstances. Don't beat yourself up over what-ifs or let regret dominate your life. And remember there is no medal for martyrdom. If you decide to give up your career, do it because you believe it's the best thing for your family, not because you want people to know how noble or self-sacrificing you are.

Are You Part Of The Team?

Last Sunday, our pastor said something that I can still remember one week on - a rare thing for me.

Speaking about teamwork and the future direction of HXUCA, he asked, "Are you ready to go from being part of the team to being part of the Dream Team?"

Here's my interpretation of what that means.

When you're part of the Dream Team, you belong with those who

• make things happen
• drive positive change
• exert strong moral influence in the community
• attract support from people who share your values and love what you do.

This week, Pastor expanded on the teamwork idea further when he wrote in the newsletter that when we suggest ideas and activities for the church, it should be with the understanding that we are prepared to put in the legwork to make it happen. We should not depend only on the Church Council, the Elders Council or the pastor.

To that end, blank sheets have been put up on the noticeboard in church to encourage members to write down ideas and activities that they want to see in 2009 for the following areas:

• Service and Outreach
• Worship
• Education
• Hospitality
• Fellowship

Action Challenge

What about you, are you part of the Dream Team in your place of work/service?

Good Boss vs Bad Boss

My friend who's just migrated to NZ has written this insightful piece comparing what life is like under a good/bad boss.

What's your boss like?

And if you're a boss yourself, do you think your co-workers would label you a GB or BB?

If Jesus Came To Your House...

Lois Blanchard Eades
presumed public domain

If Jesus came to your house to spend a day or two
If He came unexpectedly, I wonder what you'd do.

Oh, I know you'd give your nicest room to such an Honored Guest.
And all the food you'd serve to Him would be the very best.

And you would keep assuring Him you're glad to have Him there-
That serving Him in your own home is joy beyond compare.

But--when you saw Him coming, would you meet Him at the door
With arms outstretched in welcome to your Heavenly Visitor?

Or would you have to change your clothes before you let Him in?
Or hide some magazines and put the Bible where they'd been?

Would you turn off the radio and hope He hadn't heard?
And wish you hadn't uttered that last, loud, hasty word?

Would you hide your worldly music and put some hymn books out?
Could you let Jesus walk right in, or would you rush about?

And I wonder--if the Saviour spent a day or two with you,
Would you go right on doing the things you always do?

Would you go right on saying the things you always say?
Would life for you continue as it does from day to day?

Would your family conversation keep up its usual pace?
And would you find it hard each meal to say a table grace?

Would you sing the songs you always sing, and read the books you read,
And let Him know the things on which your mind and spirit feed?

Would you take Jesus with you everywhere you'd planned to go?
Or would you, maybe, change your plans for just a day or so?

Would you be glad to have Him meet your very closest friends?
Or would you hope they'd stay away until His visit ends?

Would you be glad to have Him stay forever on and on?
Or would you sigh with great relief when He at last was gone?

It might be interesting to know the things that you would do
If Jesus Christ in person came to spend some time with you.

Aging Gracefully with Julie Andrews

To commemorate her birthday, actress/vocalist Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan 's Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of the AARP.

One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favourite Things' from the legendary movie 'Sound Of Music'.

Here are the lyrics she used:

(Sing It!) - If you sing it, it's especially hysterical!!!

Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favourite things.

Cadillacs and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favourite things.

When the pipes leak,
When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad,
I simply remember my favourite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favourite things.

Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favourite things.

When the joints ache,
When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad.

Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores.

What's The Purpose Of Your Work?

Your work is what you do, be it paid or unpaid. Volunteer work is work too, because you are giving of your time, talents and skills to create value and add value to others.

What is the purpose of your work?

Is it just to earn a living and to get by?

What is the purpose of your business or project or whatever it is you spend your time doing?

I was speaking with a friend recently and she said something that I feel we need to ask ourselves from time to time.

My friend and two other persons founded the Opportunity Shop in our church. The opp shop fulfills a great community need in our mortgage-belt suburb. It provides a low-cost place to purchase clothing, household appliances, personal accessories and all those random things we need to have a reasonably comfortable life. These items are donated by people who no longer need them, and are then cleaned, made presentable and resold at a very low cost to the community.

My friend tells me that the opp shop's income has steadily risen in the last few years, and a lot of it is due to people feeling the pinch and trying to find ways to save money. She tells me that recently, the opp shop received some feedback suggesting that they should up their prices so they can make a bigger profit.

But my friend feels that this is the wrong way to go. The purpose of the opp shop is not to make lots of money. Its primary purpose is to meet a community need. If it prices its items beyond the reach of ordinary folk who need them, it would make more money but fail in its mission of serving the poor and needy. So my friend - bless her - is standing her ground on this issue.

We too can gain a lot of clarity and energy in our lives if we go back to basics and ask ourselves some questions:

What is our life purpose?
What is our career purpose?
Why did we choose this job or this organization or this industry?
Are our spiritual, emotional, physical and intellectual needs being met by what we spend most of our time and energy doing?
Are we living in harmony with our purpose?

The Story of the Spider

After a particularly violent storm, the spider's half-spun web lay in tatters. The spider itself had been flung to the ground, and it now painfully inched its way up the wall towards the ruins of its home.

The spider followed the trail it knew best, crawling slowly upwards. But the wall had become wet and slippery, and once the spider reached a certain height, it would fall off. But it never gave up. Each time it fell, it would doggedly start all over again...

A passerby saw the spider's travails and sighed to himself: "Isn't my life just like this poor spider's? Always busying myself rushing here and there, and in the end, what do I achieve? Nothing."

Bowing his head in despair, he walked away, and from that day on sank into a depression.

A second passerby watched the spider and exclaimed: "What a stupid spider! Why can't he take a different route and crawl up from the section of the wall that is dry? In life too, one often encounters fools. I shall not be one of them!"

The second passerby went away with a swagger, determined to shine amongst his fellow men. In the conduct of his affairs he became clever and crafty.

The third passerby crouched down to observe the spider. Moved by what he saw, he sighed, "Ah spider! In countless battles you face countless failures, yet someday you will surely prevail! Man too should learn to be persevering like you!"

The third passerby went away, heartened and encouraged, and from that day on, he became much more resolute and resilient, and found success in all that he put his hand to.

Lesson

有什么样的心态，就会接受什么样的教育，就会领悟到什么样的道理。
Your attitude determines how teachable you are, and your teachability will determine the life lessons you learn.

《蜘蛛的故事》

What Does A Fulfilling Career Look Like?

Imagine waking up every day and thinking: "I'm so lucky. I look forward to going to work. I'm doing what I love."

That's the essence of what it means to have a fulfilling career.

If you put your career to this test, what would your response be?

If your career is not giving you joy, what one thing can you do today and explore your options and make a decision that would move you closer to career joy?

RESOURCES:

Find out how to align your life with universal principles so that you live a congruent life.

How Do You Express Yourself?

I was listening to a Steve Pavlina podcast today on Creative Self-Expression.

CSE is about being yourself and accepting yourself.

If you want to create passive income, think of how to create passive value for others. What valuable thing can you give them even if you're not physically present?

If you want abundance, spend more time expressing and sharing who you really are. Give more than you are receiving. If you are experiencing scarcity, it's because you are taking more than you are giving.

Don't confuse the method of expression with your message. Your career is not defined by the medium you choose.

For example, Steve's career is all about growth. He expresses his passion for growth in a variety of ways: through writing, blogging, speaking. The message is growth, and that's what he tries to share with people.

Likewise, my career is not about writing per se. It's about helping others to overcome their personal limitations and the restrictions imposed by conventional norms. It's about exploring and charting new directions in life. It's about helping people to write a new life/career story. I get my message out through writing and blogging and email coaching of like-minded persons. Those are my outlets. My message is about creating something new and positive out of one's past mistakes and negative experiences.

Love Yourself, Keep Yourself Safe

Missing Melbourne backpacker Britt Lapthorne has been found - and the outcome is every parent's worst nightmare.

No one can feel anything but sympathy and pain for her parents and brother. They are left with the heartbreaking reality of the loss of a beautiful 21 y.o. girl who was enjoying herself on holiday when she vanished from a nightclub in Croatia.

A journalist penned her personal thoughts in MXNews this week.

Commenting on the Britt Lapthorne case, she confessed that she had travelled to Croatia previously and had visited the very same nightclub. She admitted that when she was there, she had gotten carried away by the atmosphere and the fact that she was on holiday. She partied too much, drank too much; she was alone in a strange place. In other words, she put herself in a vulnerable position. She was fortunate to come home unscathed.

I thought it was brave and honest of her to say what she did. Perhaps her commentary can act as a wake-up call to other young travellers, particularly solo backpackers, not to take unnecessary risks in a strange country. By all means have your adventures, but remember that there are people who love you and who are waiting for you to come home safe and well.

The 2 Best Feelings In The World Are...

1. Lying in bed with my girls on either side of me
2. My little girl's arms wrapped around my neck as she snuggles up close

What 2 sensations inspire you to feel joy and contentment?

The Secret of Success

I love this reminder from the Heathdale Christian College newsletter.

The secret of success in life is for a man to be ready for his time when it comes.
Benjamin Disraeli

Success is developed daily, not in a day, this is the law of process. What a person does on a disciplined, consistent basis gets him ready for success, no matter what the goal.

If you want to be successful in your studies (same goes for everything else you set your heart to), the good news is that you are in control of the outcomes.

Everyone has the potential, but success isn't an event, it's a process.

SUCCESS ISN'T AN EVENT, IT'S A PROCESS.

The Loss Of An Icon

Why is it that people are most honoured not while they live but at their own funerals, when they can no longer see or hear or appreciate what others say about them?

The first time I heard that JBJ had passed on was today (a week after the event!), when I was surfing MrBrown.com and read PM's condolence letter. I can't believe I didn't hear the news before this.

Singapore has lost a great statesman.

I wanted to see what people were saying about the event. Googled "JBJ" and found:

• an insightful and touchingly honest tribute by Dharmendra Yadav
• video footage of the funeral
• a YouTube "Memory of JBJ" tribute with Candle In The Wind playing in the background.

I respect JBJ for his courage, his tenacity and his vision.

I think The Australian captured the essence of what JBJ stood for best. They called him "champion of democracy". In daring to walk his beliefs and ideals, he has shown the rest of us what it means to choose excellence over mediocrity and to make choices based on courage rather than fear and unthinking compliance.

The Secret to Contentment (Part 2)

我无论在什么景况都可以知足，这是我已经学会了。我知道怎么处卑贱，也知道怎样处丰富；或饱足，或饥饿；或有余，或缺乏，随是随在，我都得了秘诀。我靠着那加给我力量的，凡事都能做。

腓立比书 4:11-13

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.
I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.
I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:11-13

The Secret To Contentment

要使生活变得幸福，一定量的忍受力是必要的。

你忍受不了乡下的单调生活，那城市里的生活能够永远给你新鲜感吗？你对麦当劳，足球，电影也有厌倦的一天，那时候，你又镇么办呢？

伟人的生平，除了某些光彩夺目的时刻以外，也都是平凡的。

幸福的生活在很大程度上是一种平静安逸的生活，因为只有在平静的环境里，真正的快乐才能得以纯在。

《来杯幸福茶》

If you see little squares, it could be that you have not downloaded the global IME that lets you read Chinese text.

Download your Global IME here.

If you are using Windows XP, you can configure your computer to read Chinese using the Control Panel.

When God Provides

Today, I had to drive somewhere I'd never driven by myself.

If it wasn't to fulfil a commitment I'd made, I'm sure I would've found lots of excuses not to go.

So I did what I could: I checked Melway, looked up the Street Directory website to make sure I had the most current map, and prayed a simple prayer as I got behind the wheel.

Whenever I drive someplace new, I always feel like I'm holding my breath the whole way through. That's how anxious I get. I'm also beset by a variety of obstacles: inexperience, poor hand-eye-foot coordination, slow reflexes, slow brain. None are helpful when you need to drive and navigate.

Near Thames Boulevard on Heaths Road, I looked into the rearview mirror and found a white car tailgating me.

There's nothing that makes me more nervous than a car following too closely.

The driver in question was unfortunate to be behind me on a single-lane road. I couldn't pull over to let him overtake, the road was that narrow.

It took me a while to shake off the sense that I was holding him up. I tried accelerating, but ended up going over the 70 kmh mark, so I had to slow down again. I wonder what he must have been thinking while stuck behind me.

As I stressed about road signs and whether I was headed in the right direction, a funny thought came to me. It might have been a way to combat all that stress, but I wondered: what if the driver was a guardian angel sent by God to ensure I got to Manor Lakes?

And you know what was even stranger?

Just as I went through the last section of Ballan Road and approached the entrance to Manor Lakes, I glanced into my rearview mirror and the white car that had tailed me all the way along Heaths Road...was gone.

Something similar happened on the way home.

I'd read the map, knew what landmarks to look out for, but was still nervous about getting home safely.

As I got on to Ballan Road, a blue 4WD tailed me. This time, I wasn't as stressed. I just thought: thanks God, another guardian angel! The blue 4WD followed me all the way along Ballan Road and half of Heaths Road. By this time I'd gotten my bearings and knew I was close to home. I signalled to switch to the left lane, expecting the 4WD to overtake now I was out of his way. The driver chose not to, and maintained his speed so that I was able to see him way behind in the right lane as I prepared to turn into Barber Drive and home.

God had heard and God had answered - in His own special way. Thank you Lord.

A Chance To Choose

During a family funeral this week, my aunt shared about her late mum and how she had come to accept Christ just before she passed away.

What persuaded her to say yes to Christ was the fear that she would otherwise not get to see her late husband again, as he had died a Christian.

My aunt thanked God that her parents had "a chance to choose" salvation, and that phrase stayed in my mind.

You and I have a chance to choose too.

This chance is presented to us every single day that we live and breathe.

Do we use it to say yes to Christ and to eternal life with Him, or do we say "no" or "later" and find out too late that we no longer have the chance to choose, because death or disability have robbed us of our abilities?

Family Ties

On Tue, my family (my cousin, my hubby and Beth) drove from Hoppers Crossing to Moonee Ponds to attend a funeral.

The lady who passed away was my "cheet chim poh" (7th grandaunt), my granddad's half brother's wife.

Our families weren't close.

When I was growing up, we met only once a year during Chinese New Year.

As a child, I remember those occasions as something to dread rather than delight in.

The extended family liked to descend upon my grandma's place on the first day of Chinese New Year.

They would usually come just after lunch in a group of twenty or so, all three generations at the same time. It was like a huge family reunion.

My grandma enjoyed being the hostess and matriarch of the clan (she was the most senior of her generation), but as a child and later a teen, I hated those occasions.

You had to greet all the granduncles and grandaunties (and try not to accidentally call 6th grandaunt 7th/10th grandaunt); uncles and aunts; and figure out who was who amongst the innumerable cousins whose names you couldn't remember afterwards, especially as the number increased over the years.

My job was to serve drinks (Fanta orange, anyone?), and I tell you it's no joke counting the guests and trying to make sure every one has got a drink in the midst of all the noisy greetings.

Especially when you're an introvert and all you want is to hide away somewhere and read a book instead of being subject to adult comments about how tall you've grown and how well (or not) you are doing at school.

I suppose it wasn't easy for the adults either.

They had a customary obligation they couldn't get out of: to hand out red packets to all the children and unmarried adults.

I got a taste of this unique adult responsibility years later when I was married and had to hand out red packets myself. My solution? Stay away from grandma's place on the afternoon of the first day of CNY!

Back to the funeral.

It's been more than two years since I've seen any of the extended family. I was happy to leave it to my mum and aunts and uncles to keep up the tradition of visitations and phone calls.

Then last week, my aunt texted me to say 7th grandaunt had passed away in Melbourne, and could my two cousins and I attend the wake on behalf of our respective families in Singapore.

There's no more powerful reminder of your age than a summons of this nature.

Represent the family? Surely that's for the elders to do? But of course, they're all in Singapore and we're here.

In the end, only one cousin was able to make it. We met outside the funeral home which turned out to be a church. There were fewer than twenty present, just the immediate family and a couple whom I'm guessing were the in-laws of one of my cousins.

But you know what?

Even though I confessed to my aunt that I couldn't remember very much of her mum (I didn't recognize the old lady till I looked at the portrait next to the casket), I'm glad we went.

The older I get, the more I appreciate belonging to a family.

Even if I'm not close to some members, even if my memories are tainted by the prejudices and perceptions of childhood, they are still my aunts and uncles and grandaunts and granduncles.

I'm even starting to feel a certain pride in my place in the extended family. A strong desire to do a good job of representing my elders. Knowing the right things to say. Respecting the old ways. Honouring traditions and customs.

I don't necessarily agree with the thinking behind some customs, but God has opened my eyes to subtlety and discretion. I can honour the person without being a slave to human tradition. I can affirm and empathize despite differences in age and upbringing and the separation of time and distance.

And every opportunity for contact is an opportunity to be an ambassador for Christ.

When I greeted the two granddaughters of 7th grandaunt, I made a conscious and bold decision to hug them instead of shaking hands as I might have done. The older of the granddaughters hugged me back so tightly and for so long that I felt embarrassed. She had been very close to her grandma, and she afterwards gave a beautiful eulogy which told me more about her grandma in ten minutes than I could've ever learnt in thirty CNYs.

I'd brought Beth with me, and my rellies were delighted to see how much she's grown. I think she was just a toddler when we last met. The two granddaughters, one newly married, are therefore aunts to Beth.

As we swapped contacts and returned to our respective cars after the cremation, my aunt reminded us that we should keep in touch, otherwise "our generation" (mine and my cousins') would not know each other.

She has a good point.

We're all grown up and we've moved on from our mischievous, annoying, crazy childhood days. We probably have more in common now. If we continue to keep the family connection alive, who knows what new chapters of family history we can pass on to our own children.

Discovering and Accepting Your Weak Spots

Met a friend at church today and she made a comment that set off an "Aha!" moment in my brain.

"I'm not a playgroup mom. I tried it for a while but found I COULDN"T STAND THE NOISE!"

I thought her remark funny at the time, because she's a mom of three...boys.

But her remark also helped make sense of the conflict going on in my headspace.

For the past 7 months, I've been helping out at Monday playgroup with two other ladies.

We set up the play room, serve tea, coffee and bikkies at 10.30, chat with the moms, organize hands-on activity for the tots, wash the coffee cups and put away the toys.

It's not hard work.

Yet I have to admit, at times it's been a struggle. While it's nice to be doing something useful that meets a real need, I find I'm actually glad when the school hols come around and there's no playgroup.I've been trying to figure out what's behind the sense of low satisfaction.I've narrowed it down to two possibilities.

One, I'm not a natural kids person.Some people are just kid magnets. They know exactly what to say to a child to make her eyes light up or to send her into fits of giggling.

What I've managed to achieve so far - in terms of saying the right sorts of things to littlies so they don't run crying back to Mom - has been a gift from my own parenting experience.

If not for my own two challenging me and forcing me to improvise everyday, I wouldn't have the confidence to approach someone's child or to have him come over on a play date.Conversations with kids are one of the riskier things in life, something you can't properly control.

Have you ever tried to strike up a conversation with a 4 y.o., they answered yes/no, and the conversation just died?

The second reason I think I struggle with Mondays is because I'm not naturally social.

I may manage to make decent conversation on a one-on-one basis, but I tend to shrink into the background and come across as aloof if I encounter a group.

I've discovered that I have a pretty strong need for a sense of belonging, to feel that I'm making a difference, otherwise I get discouraged and feel like my presence is redundant.

When you're in playgroup, you can't just do the wallflower thing and chase your kid all the time. Part of the reason you're there is to mingle.

Things are getting better now that I've got to know a few of the moms better and we're on a come-over-for-coffee basis.

But I can tell you, I felt like a real outsider at the start. Almost an intruder, as most of the moms seemed to have known each other for a long time and their kids played together well.

So maybe what the past 7 months has been about is a process of self-discovery and acceptance.
You have to give something a go to know if it fits you or not.And finding out that something's not for you is never a loss or failure or a waste of time, because you do learn valuable stuff about yourself.

Such as "I'm not a playgroup mum". ;-)

Are you overpaid?

This week, there was a news item about Nicole Kidman being Hollywood's most overpaid actress.

If you were Nicole, how would you feel about being labelled that way?

What about your current work situation?

Do you regard yourself as overpaid or underpaid?

Before you answer, consider these questions:

1. Are you giving at least 100%?
2. Do you actively engage in creative activity to brainstorm exciting and fun new ways to do things at work?
3. Are you constantly thinking of ways to improve your organisation's products and service levels?
4. Do you help your team do its best? Are you a peacemaker or tension maker? A team player or team parasite?
5. Is your daily work about adding value to your organisation, or are you satisfied with just doing the bare minimum to keep your job?

If you've reached the point where

• you're burnt out
• you've lost the zeal and passion you once had for your job
• you feel you're going nowhere in your career and therefore you can't be bothered to do your best,

these are all danger signs that you are an overpaid worker.

Much as we would like the organisation to take more notice of us as individuals, the truth is that there are very few bosses out there who will sit down for a real heart-to-heart with us one on one.

They may be too busy.

Or maybe they aren't the people-oriented type. They don't know how to go about doing something so potentially fraught with emotion, so they avoid it.

These things are outside our control.

What we can control, though, is our attitude and our actions.

We can choose to take ownership of our careers.

We can choose to be active team members in our workplaces.

An active team member is positive and can-do; he doesn't wait to be told what to do.

An active team member has the interests of the organisation in mind at all times. His actions and decisions are geared towards helping the organisation be its best.

An active team member sees himself as having a vested interest in how well the organisation does. He wants the organisation to succeed.

He is concerned about the quality of its products and services.

He constantly thinks of better ways to do things so that the organisation fulfils the reasons for its existence.

He knows that one way to help the organisation excel is by helping his boss do a great job.

So he supports his boss by doing great work himself, by providing useful, honest feedback, and by helping his boss look and feel good.

Obviously, some savvy is required here. We're not talking about playing politics or sucking up to the boss, but of genuinely wanting a win-win-win for the boss, the organisation and for yourself.

We're talking about how you can consistently prove yourself over time to be the Most Valuable Employee your boss has ever had.

When it comes to performance bonus time and appraisal time, you will be confident rather than petrified.

You will be in control, to some extent.

This is because you would have already done such an outstanding job in the past 12 months that there is no question that you deserve to advance.

The only question is how much.

That decision, again, is outside your control.

Your boss has her own set of criteria and a limited pool of resources.

But even if you don't get the promotion or bonus you were expecting, if you're constantly working to be Most Valuable Employee, you can be assured that you're virtually recession-proof.

In a recession, the first workers to go tend to be the lowly skilled ones and those who are considered to be overpaid in relation to the value they actually provide.

If you're highly skilled in what you do and you choose to be an active team member, it's possible you will always be underpaid wherever you go.

But wouldn't you rather that - than the reverse?

Do You Own Your Fear, Or Does It Own You?

I picked up a quote today that really made me think.

It was from a Time mag article on successful professionals and the career choices they make.

Janet Reid is a Chemistry Ph.D. who joined P&G and finally left to start her own management consultancy.

She says her decision to leave P&G is like that of a hermit crab deserting its shell to seek a better one. 

"I was fueled by fear and driven by faith," she says. "I'm scared of drowning, and that's why I scuba dive. You've got to face up to the fear and own it to get to the next level."

I thought that was an incredibly powerful insight.

You can own your fear, and let it take you to greater things.

Or you can let fear own you, and stay stifled, frustrated and paralysed in your comfort zone.

Whether you're deciding to migrate or to change careers, it's always tempting not to make a decision that might rock the boat. 

The safety of the familiar is any time better than the chilling waters of uncharted territory. Especially when you're not sure of your destination.

But what if fear is just the gateway to life's next great adventure?

What would it cost you NOT to rock the boat, make a splash and swim in a different sea?

Pretend it's 30 years down the road and you're looking back on your life.

Will the older and wiser you say, "I'm glad I did that and risked that and experienced that", or will it be "I wish I'd had the guts to try; it's too late now"?

The Benefits of Failure and the Importance of Imagination

I love JK Rowling.

Not just for Harry Potter, but for her incredible life story.

It's an inspiring tale of resilience, of self-belief, of passion, of purpose, of courage.

She shares some of the magic in her commencement address to the 2008 Harvard graduates, which you can read here:
http://harvardmagazine.com/go/jkrowling.html

May you be inspired to fully live the life God has given you.

The knowledge that you have emerged wiser and stronger from setbacks means that you are, ever after, secure in your ability to survive. You will never truly know yourself, or the strength of your relationships, until both have been tested by adversity. Such knowledge is a true gift, for all that it is painfully won, and it has been worth more to me than any qualification I ever earned.
JK Rowling

Can you survive without a job?

I got thinking about this recently when we had dinner with friends who are new migrants.

The husband had just received a job offer from the Government, and you could tell the couple were elated.

He's waited six months, sending out applications and waiting for the phone call or email that can change his life and his family's financial position.

For a highly qualified Singapore professional, being jobless in a foreign First World country can be excruciating, a sort of baptism by fire.

That got me thinking.

Is it possible to have a life where you make money without getting a job?

Can you go against herd instinct and make money in other ways?
Why does everyone seem to think that getting a job is the best and only way to make money?

I was at the doctor's today for laryngitis. J had a nasty cough as well.

When I requested a medical certificate, the doctor's first question was: "What work do you do?"

I had to explain that I'm a stay-home mum, and that the MC was actually for my husband because he's taking carer's leave to look after us.

So he made out the MC in my husband's name.

It struck me as particularly galling that being a stay-home requires me to justify the work I do.

Perhaps I should have said "I am a writer" or "I am an online business owner".

Even then, I suspect the doctor would have looked suspiciously at me and thought I was being funny.

Isn't it interesting how the default position is that everyone who is able-bodied and not studying or raising a family should have a job?

Look at the way superannuation and bank loans are designed.

If you are an employee, your organization puts in the 9% or 17% contribution into your super.

The seeds of your retirement funds start from there.

When you want to borrow money to buy a house, the bank calculates your borrowing capacity and your serviceability capacity.

One criteria they use is your income.

Without evidence of a stable income over a period of at least 12 months, you might have to resort to borrowing from a second-tier financial insitution at a possibly higher interest rate (what they call lo-doc or no-doc loans).

How do you demonstrate a stable income over a length of time?

Again, a job is the best way to do it.

And yet, when you think of it, a job is hardly any form of security these days.

Recently, Ford Australia laid off 600 jobs. This was followed by a second-round cut of 350 jobs. On the same day that the 350 job cuts were announced, the company president resigned and returned to USA.

We are talking of nearly a thousand workers and their families whose livelihoods are suddenly threatened through a corporate decision completely outside their control.

If these workers receive job offers soon after, good for them.

What happens if they don't?
What happens if their reserves run out before the next job offer comes along?
What if they are single-income families where one spouse has stayed home to raise the kids?
What if there's an accident resulting in a disability, and the insurance company or TAC drags its feet about paying out?

These are the possibilities no one likes to think about.

We think it won't happen to us.

But bad things do happen every day that could threaten our family's welfare and put us in financial stress.

Studies have shown that finances are the main cause of domestic disputes.

If the sole source of income dries up, what then?

It is too awful to think about, so most of us refuse to go there.

But this is precisely why we need to make advance preparations.

We have to start thinking of alternative ways to make money while we are relatively financially stable, not when that stability is gone.

Banks lend money to you when you don't need it.

When you actually need money, you can be fairly certain the bank manager will politely show you the door.

Let's think for a minute of alternatives.

If you haven't got a job, or don't plan on getting one because you hate being tied down to one organization (which in a sense is what having a job is about), you could do one of several things:

• Hire yourself out as a freelancer or consultant, and do what you're skilled at, but for many clients rather than one. This way, you diversify your risk. If one client folds, there are always others.
• Convert a hobby into a stream of income. Teach music to the kids in your neighbourhood, walk people's pets, sell hand-crafted jewellery at craft fairs.
• Do jobs most people would be glad to pay someone else to do. Mow lawns, distribute fliers, do packing at ALDI's, do the ironing for someone who hates domestic chores.
• Start a business. If you have the capital and your market research has turned up an opportunity for your kind of business, by all means go for it. You could start from scratch or invest in a franchise. Not many people have access to large amounts of capital though, so if this is your situation, you may have to consider other low-cost ways of doing business.
• How about joining an MLM company? Of course you will have to do your due diligence and evaluate the opportunity before you part with a single cent.
• Now consider going online, like so many people dream of doing. When you do your research carefully, you will be surprised at how easily the Internet medium lends itself to all sorts of individuals, life situations and types of businesses. Including all the ones we've just discussed.

An online business is the perfect income-producing avenue for almost anyone.

Retirees who want to enjoy life their own way.

Career changers who - like 72% of American households - want to work from home.

Work at home parents looking for a way to help with the family expenses while looking after the kids.

Info publishers and infopreneurs.

Turn your specialist knowledge about something people want into a stream of income.

Elad did it with kids' parties.



Sellers of hard goods. You could be a maker of goods, a sourcer of goods, an artist, or someone who has found a unique way to present an array of goods from different sources.

Sellers of e-goods.Watch Tomaz turn tennis into checks.

Affiliate marketers who specialize in marketing and selling other people's products. They get a commission on each sale they make.

Network marketers who prefer a unique website to the company's duplicate website. With your own website, you have a better chance of reaching out to more qualified prospects than you could ever find time to meet or call individually.

Real estate agents. If you are an agent, you may have discovered that your company website doesn't do much to help you grow your business. How do you capture some of that online passing traffic and use it to bring in the buyers and sellers who are interested in the properties you are listing?

It's incredible just how useful and how flexible the Internet is. It can help you start a business, take control of your career and finances, and enhance the quality of your lifestyle to fit better with what you most love doing.

Ethel Turner, Australian Author

I do want fame - plenty of it. Today I feel I want it almost more than anything, nothing else can quite satisfy me. If a Fairy came along and offered me Love or Fame, of course I should choose Love. No, I don't see why I shouldn't have both.
From Ethel Turner's diary (1893)

Not one of the seven is really good, for the very excellent reason that Australian children never are.
Seven Little Australians

...an aching to go and live where life is lived, not just passed through...

The Silver Lining

The past week has been harrowing for our church family, particularly the family whose daughter/sister is in hospital with blood clots in her brain.

I want to dwell, not on the medical aspects of the drama that is still unfolding, but on what it has done to our church family.

The silver lining in the cloud, if you will.

HXUCA is outstanding for its hospitality.

CA and I should know, having been warmly embraced and made to feel welcome in so many ways in the past 2 years.

But after what has recently happened, HXUCA can lay claim to another character trait that would make the Apostle Paul proud.

It is the spirit of unity and purpose that Paul wrote about in the book of Philippians, when he exhorted the believers to look out for each other.

1If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
(Phil.2:1-4)

What I have witnessed in the past week has been just that.

On Thu, when the news broke that S was very ill, emails and phone calls helped the rest of the church family keep informed of what was happening.

On Fri night, a prayer meeting was held.

One of the elders had a brilliant idea. She suggested we create a pink-&-purple prayer chain from rolled up pieces of craft paper joined together. Pink and purple are S's fave colours.

The idea was to fill the chain with messages of encouragement, love and blessing, so S could have something pretty that she can see and touch when she wakes up from her induced coma.

What really touched me about the prayer meeting was the attitude of the people present.

Not for HXUCA men and women the stiff, formal, "proper" prayers I'm so accustomed to.

These were earnest prayers, passionate prayers, prayers of desperation, hope, and faith.

Prayers that emanated from deep within the hearts of those that uttered them.

The requests were bold yet humble.

I tell you, I was so humbled and touched.

Had I been an outsider, I would have been immensely impressed and drawn to the Christian faith.

As a fairly recent member of the HXUCA family, I am so proud of my brothers and sisters for the way they demonstrate so clearly and unabashedly how much they love S and want her to get well.

I am so glad to be a part of this loving family of faith.

Do you know your purpose?

That is the challenge life coach David Wood threw me today.

Not verbally.

Just an email inviting me to join him and Tim Kelly on a free coaching call on Thu 2 pm EST. That works out to Friday 5 am in Melbourne - still not too bad, considering I've had to wake up even earlier for some other calls.

What was interesting was the content of the offer.

On this call with Tim Kelley and David Wood, you'll learn about how finding your purpose can help you answer life's deepest questions: Why am I here? What am I meant to do? Create the life you desire!

Which naturally leads me to ask you: do YOU know your purpose?

I hope you do.

David and Tim are right in that if you're vague about your purpose, it's going to have a negative flow-on effect on the rest of your life.

When you are aligned with a clear purpose and everything you do, say and think resonates with that purpose, it attracts people.

There is something beautiful about someone whose purpose is clear and defined, whose gaze is direct, whose mind is uncluttered.

What that driving purpose is is another issue.

Again I ask, what is YOUR purpose?

I find that as the years go by, my purpose becomes narrower, sharper, more defined.

I know by Whom I am made and for Whose purpose.

That makes it easier for me to define my purpose.

It is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.

I do that by expressing myself the way He made me, the way that is most natural for me.

By writing and communicating in a way that

• glorifies Him and brings honour to His name, and that


• edifies my fellow man and builds him up.

Today, I read Philippians 2. This is what the apostle Paul says:

1If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. 3Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Do you know your purpose?

The Creative Process (Stream of Consciousness Style)

I have been working - nay, wrestling - over my website.

If all goes to plan, this will be the first of many.

But the first one is the hardest.

Oh, I know I can pay someone to do it.

But that would be too easy, and I wouldn't learn half as much.

Or have as much fun.

I want to do it the right way.

Not just getting the technical bits right, which is completely out of my depth.

I'm thinking more about the writing aspect.

I want to write from the heart.

Share what is true.

Talk truthfully and objectively about what has worked for me and what hasn't.

Create something that will be of real use and benefit to others.

Not just something that pulls traffic and brings in dollars.

Although that would be a nice bonus!

It's got to be perfect (that reminds me of a song...) in every way.

Honouring to God.

Edifying to people.

Satisfying for me in a creative, artistic sense.

That is why it's so hard.

And also because I suffer from some form of attention deficit disorder.

I start brainstorming Theme A, then get sidetracked into "How about Theme B? That would be a good one too, lots of content and ideas..."

It has happened over and over for the past year.

Theme A gets abandoned in favour of Theme B, which in turn gets overwhelmed by Theme C, then after a huge U-turn, I come back to Theme A - or some variant of it.

I am trying to enjoy the uncertainty of the creative process, while keeping one eye on the practical.

My husband reminds me to Focus.

He knows me well.

I could sit and dream up a dozen different ideas to save the world and change lives, but it's not going to matter if none of those ideas makes it to implementation.

I have to just launch Something, put Something out there, and see what happens.

Going forward and reverse engineering at the same time.

It's so exciting when the seed of an idea starts to form.

You could go anywhere with it.

Do anything with it.

Let it take you on adventures.

Whatever you do, just don't tell it to go away.

It might not come back!

Mary Poppins & The Abundance Mentality

I've watched the musical Mary Poppins countless times with the kids.

Each time I do, I either learn something new or get an old lesson reinforced.

There's this bit in the story where , Bert, Mary and the kids travel back from the racecourse where Mary had just won a trophy and taught Supercalifraglisticexpialidocious to her audience.

It was raining back at the park and Bert's chalk drawings on the pavement were all ruined.

"Oh Bert," sighed Mary, "all your fine drawings."

Bert saw it differently.

"There's plenty more where they came from," he replied.

"Besides, looks like good chestnut weather to me."

Just think of that.

Bert is able to put a positive spin on what looks like a setback - he's no longer thinking of what he's lost (the chalk drawings) but what he can create afresh.

And he's looking at other opportunities the bad weather can provide, that silver lining every cloud has if we look hard enough.

If he can't sell chalk drawings, he can sell something else - hot chestnuts.

What a clever, resourceful, creative chimney sweep.

I can think of more applications.

Did you notice Bert hasn't confined himself to chimney sweeping? He's a chalk artist, a busker and a streetside vendor of hot chestnuts on cold, wet days.

Multiple streams of income. Yep.

But I'm thinking of something else too.

Bert hasn't allowed his current reality (being a lowly chimney sweep, which surely was fairly low on the social ladder for his time) to limit him from doing good, living well and expressing himself the best way he can.

In the story, he's also a friend to children and a counselor to adults (even those adults who wouldn't normally socialize with chimney sweeps).

Action Challenge
What's keeping you back from living a full life?
What can you start doing today to live a fuller, more vibrant life?

Why We Need To Learn To Defend Our Faith

Hubby sent me this piece by Catherine Deveny of The Age.

CD can have a pretty heavy, aggressive writing style sometimes, like that of someone bent on a mission to destroy.

Her antithesis would be Stephanie Dowrick, who has a column in GW Magazine.

[SD is an ordained Interfaith Minister and author who writes reflective pieces on kindness, self-awareness, goodwill to all men - you get the idea.]

In her article, Catherine talks about how she grew up in a Christian household. She now proudly declares herself an atheist.

One para in particular caught my eye.

I think she's got it right on when she says Christians can sometimes get defensive and evasive when asked questions about our faith that we cannot readily answer.

"I question some of my progressive, believing mates about if they believe in Noah's ark, the Immaculate Conception, Adam and Eve, the Resurrection, even heaven, and they squirm a little and try to change the subject.

They get vague, defensive and then start muttering something about faith and mystery and a power of love that unites us all.

Sure, it would be easy to torture them, but they're adults and it's their life.

I just can't see why it's so difficult to have a rigorous discussion about it."

I can see why an atheist (or anyone else) would question the credibility of the Christian faith when we who profess to believe cannot give a decent, reasoned defence of our faith.

After all, the apostle Peter himself tells us in 1 Peter 3:15-16:

15But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, 16keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.

Being a believer is not just a matter of faith.

It is also a matter of engaging the thinking, reasoning mind that we have been blessed with.

Our faith is rooted not in myths and legends but in historically proven and provable events.

Some accounts in the Bible - Creation, The Great Flood - may seem to be completely at odds with what scientists have been telling us for years.

This is where we need to learn to distinguish facts from interpretation.

Two people can be presented with the same set of facts and arrive at different conclusions - because they are viewing the matter through different lenses.

These lenses are the starting point of the reasoning process and represent our values, beliefs, biases and prejudices.

Nobody can claim to be truly impartial or objective.

Not even atheists, who believe there is no God.

That in itself is an assertion, a statement of belief.

(You might even say atheism is a religion in itself.)

Our life experiences, upbringing, the learning and working environments we are exposed to, the culture of our times...all these are factors that influence why we think the way we do.

If you want a reasoned, rational way of looking at the issues raised by Catherine (Noah's Ark, Adam and Eve), I would highly recommend these resources:

• The Answers Academy course presented by the folks at Answers In Genesis
• The resources on the Creation Ministries International site.

Whom Do We Serve?

Another marvellous message from the principal of Heathdale Christian College.

========================================================

No matter how talented or successful we become, we all need a strong dose of servanthood.

As you pursue your God-given destiny, be careful.

Don't be so focused on what you love to do that you neglect what needs to be done.

A 3 a.m. nappy change isn't exciting, nor is garage sweeping.

Visiting someone who is sick may not come naturally to you.

Yet the sick need to be cared for, garages need sweeping, and nappies need changing.

For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve.
Mark 10:45 NIV

Lessons From The Valley of the Shadow

A dear friend sent me this wonderful testimony by Tony Snow, once President Bush's press secretary.

I hope it inspires you too.

God Bless,
Serena

TONY SNOW’S TESTIMONY

Tony Snow was a television commentator who eventually became President Bush’s press secretary. He had several bouts with cancer and he lost his battle this past weekend. Last October, during the midst of his illness, Tony Snow shared what spiritual lessons he had been learning through his ordeal.

Blessings arrive in unexpected packages – in my case, cancer. Those of us with potentially fatal diseases – and there are millions in America today – find ourselves in the odd position of coping with our mortality while trying to fathom God’s will. Although it would be the height of presumption to declare with confidence “What It All Means,” scripture provides powerful hints and consolations.

The first is that we shouldn’t spend too much time trying to answer the “why” questions : Why me? Why must people suffer? Why can’t someone else get sick? We can’t answer such things, and the questions themselves often are designed more to express our anguish than to solicit an answer.

I don’t know why I have cancer, and I don’t much care. It is what it is, a plain and indisputable fact. Yet even while staring into a mirror darkly, great and stunning truths begin to take shape. Our maladies define a central feature of our existence : We are fallen. We are imperfect. Our bodies give out.

But despite this, or because of it, God offers the possibility of salvation and grace. We don’t know how the narrative of our lives will end, but we get to choose how to use the interval between now and the moment we meet our creator face-to-face.

Second, we need to get past the anxiety. The mere thought of dying can send adrenaline flooding through your system. A dizzy, unfocused panic seizes you. Your heart thumps; your head swims. You think of nothingness and swoon. You fear partings; you worry about the impact on family and friends. You fidget and get nowhere.

To regain footing, remember that we were born not into death, but into life – and that the journey continues after we have finished our days on this earth. We accept this on faith, but that faith is nourished by a conviction that stirs even within many non believing hearts – an intuition that the gift of life, once given, cannot be taken away. Those who have been stricken enjoy the special privilege of being able to fight with their might and faith to live fully, richly and exuberantly – no matter how their days may be numbered.

Third, we can open our eyes and hearts. God relishes surprises. We want lives of simple, predictable ease – smooth, even trails as far as the eye can see – but God likes to go off-road. He provokes us with twists and turns. He places us in predicaments that seem to defy our endurance and comprehension – and yet don’t. By His love and grace, we persevere. The challenges that make our hearts leap and stomachs churn invariably strengthen our faith and grant measures of wisdom and joy we would not experience otherwise.

“You Have Been Called”.

Picture yourself in a hospital bed. The fog of anesthesia has begun to wear away. A doctor stands at your feet; a loved one holds your hand at the side. “It’s cancer’” the healer announces.

The natural reaction is to turn to God and ask Him to serve as a cosmic Santa. “Dear God, make it all go away. Make everything simpler.” But another voice whispers : “You have been called”. Your quandary has drawn you closer to God, closer to those you love, closer to the issues that matter and has dragged into insignificance the banal concerns that occupy our “normal time”.

There’s another kind of response, although usually short-lived, an inexplicable shudder of excitement, as if a clarifying moment of calamity has swept away, everything trivial and tiny, and placed before us the challenge of important questions.

The moment you enter the Valley of the Shadow of Death, things change. You discover that Christianity is not something doughy, passive, pious and soft. Faith may be the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. But it also draws you into a world shorn of fearful caution. The life of belief teems with thrills, boldness, danger, shocks, reversals, triumphs and epiphanies. Think of Paul, traipsing through the known world and contemplating trips to what must have seemed the antipodes, shaking the dust from his sandals, worrying not about the morrow but only about the moment.

There’s nothing wilder than a life of humble virtue – for it is through selflessness and service that God wrings from our bodies and spirits the most we ever could give, the most we could offer and the most we ever could do.

Finally, we can let love change everything. When Jesus was faced with the prospect of crucifixion, He grieved not for Himself but for us. He cried for Jerusalem before entering the holy city. From the cross, He took on the cumulative burden of human sin and weakness and begged for forgiveness on our behalf.

We get repeated chances to learn that life is not about us, that we acquire purpose and satisfaction by sharing in God’s love for others. Sickness gets us part way there. It reminds us of our limitations and dependence. But it also gives us a chance to serve the healthy. A minister friend of mine observes that people suffering grave afflictions often acquire the faith of two people, while loved ones accept the burden of two peoples’ worries and fears.

“Learning How To Live”.

Most of us have watched friends as they drifted towards God’s arms, not with resignation, but with peace and hope. In so doing, they have taught us not how to die but how to live. They have emulated Christ by transmitting the power and authority of love.

I sat by my best friend’s bedside a few years ago as a wasting cancer took him away. He kept at his table a worn Bible and a 1928 edition of the Book of Common Prayer. A shattering grief disabled his family, many of his old friends and at least one priest. Here was a humble and very good guy, someone who apologized when he winced with pain because he thought it made his guest uncomfortable. He retained his equanimity and good humor literally until his last conscious moment. “I’m going to try to beat (this cancer),” he told me several months before he died. “But if I don’t, I’ll see you on the other side.”

His gift was to remind everyone around him that even though God doesn’t promise us tomorrow, he does promise us eternity – filled with life and love we cannot comprehend – and that one can in the throes of sickness point the rest of us toward timeless truths that will help us weather future storms.

Through such trials, God bids us to choose : Do we believe, or do we not? Will we be bold enough to love, daring enough to serve, humble enough to submit and strong enough to acknowledge our limitations? Can we surrender our concern in things that don’t matter so that we might devote our remaining days to things that do?

When our faith flags, he throws reminders in our way. Think of the prayer warriors in our midst. They change things and those of us who have been on the receiving end of their petitions and intercessions know it. It is hard to describe, but there are times when suddenly the hairs on the back of your neck stand up and you feel a surge of the Spirit. Somehow you just know : Others have chosen, when talking to the author of all creation, to lift us up – to speak of us!

This is a love of a very special order. But so is the ability to sit back and appreciate the wonder of every created thing. The mere thought of death somehow makes every blessing vivid, every happiness more luminous and intense. We may not know how our contest with sickness will end, but we have felt the ineluctable touch of God.

What is man that Thou art mindful of him? We don’t know much, but we know this : no matter where we are, no matter what we do, no matter how bleak or frightening our prospects, each and every one of us who believe, each and every day, lies in the same safe and impregnable place, in the hollow of God’s hand.

Learn, Unlearn, Relearn

Being a part of the church worship team has been an incredible time of learning.

My classical training has been helpful in that I can sightread and work out chords and stuff.

Sometimes, though, it has been a bit of a hindrance, because when you are part of a team, different considerations apply.

You have to know when to play and when to hold back.

You can't play like a soloist or play the synth as if you were playing the piano.

Especially if there is another pianist involved, one who is extremely gifted and who can play anything and any genre.

The worship workshop we had 2 weekends ago has been a catalyst of positive change for the worship team.

Today was the first time we played under new leadership, and I think I'm not the only one who felt it was a change for the better.

Team morale was high.
The music flowed better, even though we had just piano, synth and bass guitar. (No drums - amazing!)
The girls sang really well, and the bit in the Hallelujah chorus when the instruments died away and it was just voices was BEAUTIFUL.

Afterwards, we had a debrief (a first!) and talked about what worked and what didn't.

I was relieved to know that the music director had some positive things to say about my playing. That's a huge encouragement, considering I'm not a seasoned keyboardist and am still feeling my way around the synth.

Thank you Lord, that however old I get, there is always something new to learn.
Keep me flexible and nimble so that I never stagnate.
Amen.

If You Don't Ask, The Answer's Always No

I'm reading You Inc. (How to attract amazing success into your life and business) by John McGrath, one of Australia's top selling real estate agents.

I love this section of the book where he tells of how he once randomly said to the facilitator of a conference he was attending, "I'm so glad to be here and to be listening to all you guys. I wish my team back home could listen to them straight from the source."

The facilitator said, "Well, why don't we ask them?"

At this point, John panicked and started trying to back out. He hadn't really intended to go anywhere with his idea. It was just something he felt at that moment.

So he tried to get out of his idea by saying, oh, these guys are too busy and too important to come.

But the facilitator wouldn't let him get away with it.

His point was: The delegates might be too busy, but John must give them the opportunity to say yes.

After tea break, the facilitator announced to the conference, "John has a request."

John was very embarrassed, but he stood up anyway.

The result was the first real estate training conference of its kind in Australia. Since then, John's company has gone on to organize similar conferences every year, and his company is now the largest real estate trainer in Australia, with a dozen top real estate experts from all over the world presenting.

Action Challenge:

What things are you holding back from saying or doing because of fear that the other person might say no?
Give him a chance to say yes.
Ask the question.
You never know what might happen.
The outcome could change your life or business in an amazing way.

How Fred Got His New Job

Here's a great story to inspire you in your career.

By Stanley Bing, writer for Fortune Magazine.

This is a story of a guy named Fred who dared to see himself as something bigger. And because he did - because he was able to take that leap of faith - he made a good thing happen. Those who dare to imagine sometimes get what they want. Those who don't never do.

We had been interviewing people for a mid-level management job for, say, five months. If that seems odd to you, then you haven't run a department where every position represents the cumulative function of six that existed before.

Choose the wrong person, and you enter a zone of dysfunction not all that different from having a debilitating disease. Ever have the flu but still have to go to the office? A bad hire is like that.

You see a lot of talented people when you're in this process, but within six seconds - not seven or eight- you know whether the person in front of you is going to be somebody with whom you can sustain a ten-minute conversation.

The only thing I look for is whether the prospect of doing so makes me feel like falling asleep. I am not being metaphorical. Since I was a child, whenever I feel anxious and trapped, my eyelids get heavy. You can see how much I like the whole enterprise, then. And yet it must be done.

One day, deep in the darkest part of this tedium, Fred knocked at my door.

Fred has worked for us for a long time, as long as I've been here, in fact. He's a good guy and a reliable, creative player. Never saw him as a manager, though. There are many like that, actually. Put them on a horse in the middle of the phalanx and they fight with gusto and brilliance. Put that horse at the front of the column and they lead the squad by a circuitous route into the swamp.

Fred stood in my doorway and said, "You found anybody for that manager slot yet?" And I thought, "Oh, no." I like Fred. I don't want to hurt Fred's feelings. "May I come in?" said Fred.
"Sure, Fred," I said.

"I've been thinking a lot about this job you're trying to fill, and I think I could be pretty good at it," said Fred. He had a file on his lap, and he opened it. "I think there's an organizational issue at the center of the problem this job would address," he continued.

I noticed he wasn't nervous. Usually Fred seems a little nervous to me, and this was sort of interesting.

"We have a good team here," he continued, "but we don't communicate enough. We're each in our own silo. I think I know everybody here very well. I think I have their respect." He did. And he had put his finger on the reason we had created this new post. People working in silos seldom produce as much Excellence as those who pull together, or Quality even.

"I've been here for a long time," Fred said. "And I'm finding that thinking about even the possibility of getting this assignment has energized me in a whole new way."

He stopped and looked at me with very big eyes, eyes gleaming with ambition and hope. And I saw the fire in his belly.

In cartoons a hungry wolf will look at a sheep in the meadow, and for a moment the cute, woolly creature itself will disappear and in its place will stand a juicy lamb chop. This is pretty much what happened when I looked at Fred. He himself vaporized, and in his place I saw a solution, and an end to interviewing.

"Okay, Fred," I said. "We have a couple more people to see, but I assure you that I'm going to think very seriously about what you've said."

"That's all?" said Fred, and I realized another thing: Thanks to his length of service, Fred and I knew each other well enough already to have attained a certain informality. "I have a lot more to tell you about if you want to hear it," he added, staring down at his file. "No, Fred," I said. "I like what you've shown me today. Let me just think about things a little."

For about a week I thought. I told a couple of people what had happened.

"For goodness' sake," they said, "give Fred a shot."

So you'll have to excuse me. This job I do is not always fun, but occasionally I get to do something that makes somebody happy. Sometimes the answer to your prayers is right under your nose.