The Courage to Challenge

From this week's church bulletin:

Dear God,
If I am completely honest with you, for some reason I am reluctant to share my story of faith with others.
Most times I prefer people to catch my faith rather than for them to comprehend it through a conversation with them.
This week I ask Lord that you will use my life as an example but also as an explanation of what you have done in and through me by Jesus Christ.
Help me to trust you to do the work of changing people's lives.
It is not my job to change people, just to challenge them.
Your Holy Spirit working in and through me and on those who you are speaking to through me is the one who makes the difference.

How did my pastor know what lies heavy on my heart this morning?

Last night, I denied the Lord.

I had a non-believing friend over for dinner.

As we were about to tuck in, my husband indicated from across the table that I should lead the prayer of thanksgiving. Everyone bowed their heads, even our guest. I was stunned, thinking my husband must have made a mistake. I frantically gestured to him that we couldn't do that because our guest was not a believer and it would be rude to impose our faith on her. There came a few tense moments as we gestured back and forth, causing an air of uncertainty on my part as to what was the right thing to do, and on the part of the rest. They must have wondered, what was going on? In the end, I said a lame "Tuck in!" and everyone fell to the meal.

But at what cost?

On reflection, I could easily have given thanks the way we usually do at home, and perhaps our guest would have gone along with it, accepting it as the custom of our family.

It would have spoken volumes of our faith.

Especially when there was a plaque on the wall behind me declaring "Christ is the Head of this house, the Unseen Guest at every meal, the Silent Listener to every conversation".

For the sake of courtesy and not wanting to offend, I forfeited the opportunity to give glory to God and to declare my affiliation with pride.

The whole night long, I was mortified over the incident. I asked God's forgiveness for my lack of faithfulness, for fearing men rather than God.

I feel God's quiet rebuke and admonishment but also His generous compassion and forgiveness. In response, there rises in me a determination to rise to His challenge, to share my life and my faith without apology and without fear.

God grant me the ability to stand up for His name from this moment on, so that I will never again sell out Jesus for fear of someone else's opinion.