Breaking Old Barriers

I am terrified of being in the spotlight.

Even singing with the church choir once a month unnerves me to the point that I get a crick in my neck, which is extremely uncomfortable when you are already battling nerves. It's the sheer terror of standing before an audience and having to meet their eyes.

That is why I was amazed that last weekend in Malacca, before a group of about 60 financial planners, I was able to deliver a fairly smooth presentation on Career Planning. I had spent a lot of time rehearsing the flow in my head, but still managed to miss a few key points. That resulted in me ending 20 minutes before my time was up, but at least the flow wasn't disrupted by my occasional mental block.

Maybe it helped that I was sharing something I feel passionate about, especially the anecdotes based on personal experience. I tried very hard to "engage the audience" as suggested repeatedly by Thomas Mathew, the guy in charge of the seminar. I looked people in the eye, tried not to stay rooted to one spot, moved my hands a little bit, fiddled with the microphone wires.

Definitely I could have done better. In fact, right after the presentation, I was back poring over my notes and identifying (with a silent groan) all the important bits I'd left out because of my mental block. I think I'll give myself a 85% for info retention, which means I have quite a ways to go to get it right.

What was better: the positive feedback from some listeners, who:
a. felt I sounded like a seasoned presenter;
b. were inspired by the Robert Frost poem I shared at the end ("Two roads diverged in a wood, and I/I chose the one less travelled by/And that has made all the difference." - I memorized it just before my turn to speak!);
c. agreed with some of my points and felt they were valid;
d. asked to be informed if I should conduct another seminar in the near future; enquired about my rates for career coaching;
e. said they might have contacts to refer to me.

Better yet, the organizers are talking about sending me to the universities to talk to undergrads; workshops; video-on-demand training over the Net.

I have broken my own fear barrier (not necessarily permanently, but it's a good start for a complete introvert), kept faith with my inner voice, and made a difference in someone's life.

For a 7th-month milestone, this ain't bad. :)