On Sunday, I picked up the following books at the library:
LEARN TO EARN by Lynch & Rothchild
THE PRESENT by Spencer Johnson, MD
SCREW IT! LET'S DO IT by Richard Branson
TOP 10 DUMB CAREER MISTAKES by Lona O'Connor
I've been so swamped lately that reading has taken a back seat, so I was really glad to get into these.
I read The Present very quickly, and initially thought it somewhat simplistic. My first reaction was: a book like this can be a bestseller??
But as I got to the end, I realized I agreed with a lot of what was said. I recognized the traits about myself that I don't like, the ones that have held me back from succeeding.
There's quite a bit to chew on in the days ahead, but the main ideas I've taken away can be very simply phrased:
Learn from the Past (not live in the past, which I sometimes do when I hold on to past glories or past hurts)
Live in the Present (which is where I'm not, because I'm either regretting past mistakes or worrying about things which have not yet happened)
Plan for the Future (not just dream about the future - big difference there, as the dream is the beginning, but the plan helps you get there)
Interestingly, when I read Richard Branson's book next, it seemed to reinforce what I'd just learnt from The Present.
Here's what Branson says on p66:
Always living in the future can slow us down as much as always looking behind. Many people are always looking ahead and they never seem content. They look for quick fixes, like winning the lottery. I know that goals are important. Money is important. But the bottom line is money is just a means to an end, not an end in itself. And what is going on now is just as important as what you're planning for the future. So, even though my diary is full for months ahead, I have learned to live for the moment.
Isn't that another way to say we must learn to live in The Present?
Living in the Present is very hard. When I'm feeding my baby, my mind is on what else I need to accomplish that day. When I'm on the phone, I'm sometimes guilty of reading email at the same time. I pride myself on my ability to multitask, but really, this is just a thin disguise for always wanting to be somewhere else.
What particularly made me smile about Branson's book is how he constantly acknowledges the role of his family in helping him succeed, and how he in turn tries to instil the same groundedness, unconditional love and family closeness in his children.
This is a man of balance, a man who has got his priorities right.
Another gem I picked up is from a story about how he raised funds to buy an old manor house in Oxford to set up a studio to make records. He was still 7,500 pounds short after borrowing from the bank and from his trust fund, and his dad suggested he talk to his Auntie Joyce. She offered to lend him the money, to be paid back with interest when he could afford it. When he started to thank her, she said, "What's money for anyway? It's to make things happen."
That's what she said! Money is To Make Things Happen. To make dreams come true. To help people in need. To solve problems. To heal. To educate. To build goodwill. To give options and choices to those who have it.
That, I think, is a very healthy, wholesome and practical way to view money. I have many hang-ups about money which are rooted in the way I was raised and by social conditioning. I recognize this and am trying to work through the needless emotional and psychological turmoil caused by my false beliefs.
Money is To Make Things Happen.
By itself, it will not make me happy, because I will always encounter something I can't afford. I should not crave it for itself, as though once I achieve a fixed dollar figure, it will guarantee me financial security and peace of mind. Money can be lost in any number of ways.
BUT I cannot run the other way and label money as the root of all evil either, as that is just a way to avoid making responsible decisions about how to use money.
I need to keep reminding myself where money comes from (God) and what it is for (to make things happen, to do good, to share God's bounty).
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Reluctant Entertainer: Entertaining vs Hospitality
This Crosswalk article captured my attention with its headline: Reluctant Entertainers: Hospitality Is A Gift You Can Give.
I am definitely a Reluctant Entertainer. I can think of so many occasions when the thought of people coming to visit stressed me out totally.
To me, having visitors means putting my home on display. Being judged. Being vulnerable to someone else's approval/disdain.
If that sounds terribly negative, it's because I'm a perfectionist by nature.
If I have guests over, the house has to be immaculate.
Not necessarily Martha Stewart style (I'm not Martha, plus I have 2 little ones), but certainly the toys, unironed clothes and dirty laundry must be hidden away, the floor vacuumed and mopped, tables and chairs aligned, the bathroom basin polished and vanity area cleared.
Nothing stresses me out more than suddenly noticing that a table or chair is not perfectly lined up with the floor tiles.
It's mad, I know, but it's this sort of purposeless detail that drives me to distraction.
That, and what to cook/serve.
I'm a middling cook to start with. My hubby's domestic skills are honed to a far higher degree, plus he is a very relaxed, laid-back sort. If the curry doesn't turn out perfect, he'll just laugh and apologize. But if it happened to me, I'd be stressing out thinking "Arrgh! What'll I do now? What will they think of me? I'm a failure!" etc etc.
Instead of focussing on being present with guests and enjoying their company, I'd be thinking ahead to what needs doing next. Very Martha, isn't it. Like the Martha that Jesus lovingly chided for trying too hard.
I think I'm improving a bit though.
Now when my cousin comes by, I sometimes toss out all inhibitions and invite her to stay for a meal. Even if there's nothing much in the house except canned food.
I may even be turning into a sort of domestic goddess of comfort food of the canned variety.
You know, you can whip up a pretty decent meal with Campbell's cream of mushroom soup + baked beans with spam...
I am definitely a Reluctant Entertainer. I can think of so many occasions when the thought of people coming to visit stressed me out totally.
To me, having visitors means putting my home on display. Being judged. Being vulnerable to someone else's approval/disdain.
If that sounds terribly negative, it's because I'm a perfectionist by nature.
If I have guests over, the house has to be immaculate.
Not necessarily Martha Stewart style (I'm not Martha, plus I have 2 little ones), but certainly the toys, unironed clothes and dirty laundry must be hidden away, the floor vacuumed and mopped, tables and chairs aligned, the bathroom basin polished and vanity area cleared.
Nothing stresses me out more than suddenly noticing that a table or chair is not perfectly lined up with the floor tiles.
It's mad, I know, but it's this sort of purposeless detail that drives me to distraction.
That, and what to cook/serve.
I'm a middling cook to start with. My hubby's domestic skills are honed to a far higher degree, plus he is a very relaxed, laid-back sort. If the curry doesn't turn out perfect, he'll just laugh and apologize. But if it happened to me, I'd be stressing out thinking "Arrgh! What'll I do now? What will they think of me? I'm a failure!" etc etc.
Instead of focussing on being present with guests and enjoying their company, I'd be thinking ahead to what needs doing next. Very Martha, isn't it. Like the Martha that Jesus lovingly chided for trying too hard.
I think I'm improving a bit though.
Now when my cousin comes by, I sometimes toss out all inhibitions and invite her to stay for a meal. Even if there's nothing much in the house except canned food.
I may even be turning into a sort of domestic goddess of comfort food of the canned variety.
You know, you can whip up a pretty decent meal with Campbell's cream of mushroom soup + baked beans with spam...
Monday, October 01, 2007
Watch This Video: Why I Love To Go To Work Everyday
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=goxxbZVSxxc
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Fabulous Footy Analogy
I love the opening paragraph of this article from The Sunday Age.
In football, as in life,
actions become habits,
habits become character,
and character becomes destiny.
Isn't that beautiful?
The article praised the team spirit and mental strength of 2007 Brownlow medallist Jimmy Bartel of the AFL Premiership Cup champions Geelong Cats.
There's a lot of truth in the quote.
What we do daily, over time, becomes a habit.
Good ones make my character. Bad ones derail me.
If I choose to form good habits and build my character, I set myself up for success.
If I choose laziness, procrastination and decision making based on wrong values, I set myself up for personal failure.
Each choice leads to a different destiny.
Which destiny do I choose, short-term gratification or long-term fulfilment?
The choice is not always obvious or easy.
Saying yes to LTF means saying no to pleasant distractions along the way. The latest property listings, Sunday Age and even the mid-afternoon cuppa must wait while I get through the hard work of writing an article, calling a potential business partner or packing for our house move.
In football, as in life,
actions become habits,
habits become character,
and character becomes destiny.
Isn't that beautiful?
The article praised the team spirit and mental strength of 2007 Brownlow medallist Jimmy Bartel of the AFL Premiership Cup champions Geelong Cats.
There's a lot of truth in the quote.
What we do daily, over time, becomes a habit.
Good ones make my character. Bad ones derail me.
If I choose to form good habits and build my character, I set myself up for success.
If I choose laziness, procrastination and decision making based on wrong values, I set myself up for personal failure.
Each choice leads to a different destiny.
Which destiny do I choose, short-term gratification or long-term fulfilment?
The choice is not always obvious or easy.
Saying yes to LTF means saying no to pleasant distractions along the way. The latest property listings, Sunday Age and even the mid-afternoon cuppa must wait while I get through the hard work of writing an article, calling a potential business partner or packing for our house move.
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Aus Universities Become A Mecca With Their Call To Prayer
http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/australian-universities-become-a-mecca-with-their-call-to-prayer/2007/09/21/1189881777596.html
2 things from this article made me smile:
1. According to the Saudi Ambassador, Aus has replaced the US as the most popular overseas destination for Saudi students.
The popularity of Aus is due to: (a) good reports from students here flowing back to Saudi Arabia; (b) the high standard of education here; (c) universities have been supportive in providing prayer and ablution rooms.
2. On concerns that potential terrorists could enter Aus with an increase in foreign students, Adjunct Prof Charles Mott, who promotes LaTrobe Uni's international relations, had this to say: "Our experience with Arab students and wider Muslim students coming here has been very good. You have to have in mind, for many coming to a country like this, it represents a substantial cultural change...these students have fitted in very well."
The Saudi Ambassador's view: Education is vital "if you want...to build relations and understand each other's culture", and that a relationship built solely around trade "never builds relationships".
Reflection
How wise and wonderful are these words!
That they come from 2 men of culturally diverse backgrounds, both no doubt men of influence in their own spheres, speaks well for the efforts of all who seek after peace.
Through the free exchange of informed views, we begin to build an awareness of ourselves and of our fellow human beings, and to appreciate the differences of race, language, religion and culture that make each of us unique.
News like this makes me glad, proud, thankful and humbled.
We are inundated with bad news everyday, and a bit of good news is a powerful antidote to the gloom and doom.
I feel blessed to live in the midst of those who take the trouble and make the effort to show respect for another's cultural and religious needs.
When this other is a student who is here to learn, imagine the power and influence of this positive experience on him when he goes back to his own country.
Who knows what wonderful things he may one day do because he received hospitality and understanding as a student in a foreign country?
2 things from this article made me smile:
1. According to the Saudi Ambassador, Aus has replaced the US as the most popular overseas destination for Saudi students.
The popularity of Aus is due to: (a) good reports from students here flowing back to Saudi Arabia; (b) the high standard of education here; (c) universities have been supportive in providing prayer and ablution rooms.
2. On concerns that potential terrorists could enter Aus with an increase in foreign students, Adjunct Prof Charles Mott, who promotes LaTrobe Uni's international relations, had this to say: "Our experience with Arab students and wider Muslim students coming here has been very good. You have to have in mind, for many coming to a country like this, it represents a substantial cultural change...these students have fitted in very well."
The Saudi Ambassador's view: Education is vital "if you want...to build relations and understand each other's culture", and that a relationship built solely around trade "never builds relationships".
Reflection
How wise and wonderful are these words!
That they come from 2 men of culturally diverse backgrounds, both no doubt men of influence in their own spheres, speaks well for the efforts of all who seek after peace.
Through the free exchange of informed views, we begin to build an awareness of ourselves and of our fellow human beings, and to appreciate the differences of race, language, religion and culture that make each of us unique.
Education is the key to understanding, and the bridge across all man-made barriers.
News like this makes me glad, proud, thankful and humbled.
We are inundated with bad news everyday, and a bit of good news is a powerful antidote to the gloom and doom.
I feel blessed to live in the midst of those who take the trouble and make the effort to show respect for another's cultural and religious needs.
When this other is a student who is here to learn, imagine the power and influence of this positive experience on him when he goes back to his own country.
Who knows what wonderful things he may one day do because he received hospitality and understanding as a student in a foreign country?
Friday, September 21, 2007
4 Simple Questions To Save Money Every Time You Shop!
by Wayne Berry
Negotiating is a term often associated with high level board room meetings and political and international wrangling, but the truth is we all have opportunities to negotiate every day.
Once we recognise this, we are set to save cash every time we buy.
The fact is everything is negotiable. Everything! The problem is that in our culture, most Australians are "conditioned" to believe that either most things are not negotiable or that it's not "nice" to negotiate.
To prove my point I went shopping one Saturday morning a few weeks ago with a friend and his wife who had both read my book "Negotiating In The Age Of Integrity" but were still not sure that they could really use the ideas there.
Read here to discover how Wayne Berry's experiment went.
Negotiating is a term often associated with high level board room meetings and political and international wrangling, but the truth is we all have opportunities to negotiate every day.
Once we recognise this, we are set to save cash every time we buy.
The fact is everything is negotiable. Everything! The problem is that in our culture, most Australians are "conditioned" to believe that either most things are not negotiable or that it's not "nice" to negotiate.
To prove my point I went shopping one Saturday morning a few weeks ago with a friend and his wife who had both read my book "Negotiating In The Age Of Integrity" but were still not sure that they could really use the ideas there.
Read here to discover how Wayne Berry's experiment went.
Simple Strategies To Success
By Jim Rohn
Published 09/20/2006
Jim Rohn is renowed as one of America's foremost business philosophers www.jimrohn.com
My first mentor, Mr. Shoaff, over a five-year period of time before he died at age 49, taught me some extraordinarily simple things.
He only went through the 9th grade in school. He never finished high school, never went to college, and never went to a university. So he put his experiences and ideas in very simple language, which, I think for me - kid from the farms of Idaho - was so important.
When I would say, "This is all the company pays."
Mr. Shoaff would say, "No, that is all they pay YOU."
I thought, "That is a new way to look at it."
I told him things cost too much.
But he said, "No, you can't afford them."
Well, that was a new concept for me.
He promised that if I would improve, then I would qualify for more money. So I learned that we don't have to work on the company, we have to work on ourselves.
If it had been technical, I would have missed it. If it had been mystic, I would have backed away. But it was just basic, blunt "a-b-c" familiar stuff that I hadn't thought of before. For me it was the beginning of what he called "personal development".
Mr. Shoaff also taught me that life puts some of the more valuable things on the high shelf so that you can't get to them until you qualify. If you want the things on the high shelf, you must stand on the books you read.
With every book you read, you get to stand a little higher.
And the "biggie" that forever had an impact on me, "Success is something you attract by the person you become."
That phrase changed my life. Success is not to be pursued, but to be attracted by the person you become.
Put your energy into becoming a better you, the best you. Learn the skills. Practice the skills. Attract the success.
These simple strategies and ideas helped change my life, forever, for the better.
Thank you, once again, Mr. Shoaff.
Published 09/20/2006
Jim Rohn is renowed as one of America's foremost business philosophers www.jimrohn.com
My first mentor, Mr. Shoaff, over a five-year period of time before he died at age 49, taught me some extraordinarily simple things.
He only went through the 9th grade in school. He never finished high school, never went to college, and never went to a university. So he put his experiences and ideas in very simple language, which, I think for me - kid from the farms of Idaho - was so important.
When I would say, "This is all the company pays."
Mr. Shoaff would say, "No, that is all they pay YOU."
I thought, "That is a new way to look at it."
I told him things cost too much.
But he said, "No, you can't afford them."
Well, that was a new concept for me.
He promised that if I would improve, then I would qualify for more money. So I learned that we don't have to work on the company, we have to work on ourselves.
If it had been technical, I would have missed it. If it had been mystic, I would have backed away. But it was just basic, blunt "a-b-c" familiar stuff that I hadn't thought of before. For me it was the beginning of what he called "personal development".
Mr. Shoaff also taught me that life puts some of the more valuable things on the high shelf so that you can't get to them until you qualify. If you want the things on the high shelf, you must stand on the books you read.
With every book you read, you get to stand a little higher.
And the "biggie" that forever had an impact on me, "Success is something you attract by the person you become."
That phrase changed my life. Success is not to be pursued, but to be attracted by the person you become.
Put your energy into becoming a better you, the best you. Learn the skills. Practice the skills. Attract the success.
These simple strategies and ideas helped change my life, forever, for the better.
Thank you, once again, Mr. Shoaff.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Planning and Decision-Making: A Biblical Perspective
By Os Hillman
Any enterprise is built by wise planning, becomes strong through common sense, and profits wonderfully by keeping abreast of the facts.
(Proverbs 24:3,4 LB)
Owning and operating an advertising agency meant I was required to develop strategic plans for companies. This meant developing plans several years ahead.
I have always believed in planning ahead. I have written many strategic plans for companies over the years.
However, there was a time when I experienced a constant state of uncertainty in my business and personal life, and I realized I could only plan so much. Things changed from day to day.
This inability to plan more than a week, or in some cases a day in advance, caused me to rethink the whole idea of planning as it relates to life and work. God was doing something in my life that could not be planned. So, if I sought to develop specific plans around what I thought God was doing, Iran adrift. It was only when I knew what God was leading that I could plan effectively.
It's a problem of using a human, logical approach versus a Spirit-led approach.
I have discovered in working with so many Christian organizations over the years, and even in my life, that human planning without the Spirit of God leading in that planning leads to presumption, failure and disappointment.
The people of Israel often fell into the habit of their own reasoning apart from the spirit of God. This frustrated God because He actually desired to accomplish things in a shorter timetable, but was unable to due to Israel's disobedience.
I am the LORD your God, who brought you up out of Egypt. Open wide your mouth and I will fill it.
But my people would not listen to me; Israel would not submit to me. So I gave them over to their stubborn hearts to follow their own devices.
If my people would but listen to me, if Israel would follow my ways, how quickly would I subdue their enemies and turn my hand against their foes! (Psalm 81:10-14)
God can accomplish more in six months through a people yielded to Him than we could accomplish in 70 years without Him. God wanted to accomplish His plan for the people of Israel a lot faster, but their disobedience prevented them from allowing Him to move on their behalf.
I must confess that it is a whole lot easier to develop a written plan for my life and execute that plan than to depend on God each day. Total dependence is a humbling condition. Unfortunately, that is exactly how God wants us to walk with Him -- in total dependence on Him day-by-day.
God is tearing apart the plans of many men and women in the workplace today because He wants to rebuild them in the way they operate in life and work. He wants total dependence upon Him, not just an occasional prayer of guidance.
George Mueller
George Mueller was a pastor in England during the nineteenth century. He was concerned that God's people had become very discouraged. They no longer looked for God to do anything unusual. They no longer trusted God to answer prayers. They had lost their faith.
Mueller began to pray as God led Him. His prayers were for God to lead him to a work that could only be explained by the people as an act of God. George wanted the people to learn that their God was a faithful, prayer-answering God.
He came upon the verse in Psalm 81:10 -- "Open wide your mouth and I will fill it." God began to lead him in a walk of faith that became an outstanding testimony to all who hear of his story.
When he felt led of God to do some work, he prayed for the resources needed and told no one of the need. He wanted all to know that God had provided for the need only in answer to prayer and faith. During his ministry in Bristol, Mueller started Scriptural Knowledge Institute for distribution of Scripture and for religious education. He also began an orphanage.
By the time of his death, George Mueller had been used by God to build four orphan houses that cared for 2,000 children at a time. Over 10,000 children had been provided for through the orphanages. He distributed over eight million dollars that had been given to him in answer to prayer. When he died at 93, his worldly possessions were valued at $800.
Oswald Chambers made an observation about planning. "Much of modern Christian enterprise is 'Ishmael.' Born not of God, but of an inordinate desire to do God’s will in our own way – the one thing our Lord never did.
"The LORD foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations. (Psalm 33:10-11)
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. (Isaiah 55:8)
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose thatprevails. (Proverbs 19:21)
Our biggest problem with planning is that we plan and carry out things in our own wisdom that only God has a right to determine. We cannot know the when, or where, or how of God's will until He tells us. God's whole method of directing us is designed for us to experience Him in the process of walking with Him. It is process-based versus outcome-based.
The methods that God used to accomplish His purposes were creative and often illogical to the human mind. Consider God requiring Joshua to walk around the city of Jericho seven times, or standing at the waters edge of the Jordan before God parted the waters for the people to pass on dry ground. Consider the blind man being told to wash his eyes with mud in order to receive sight. Consider Gideon being charged to fight with only 300 against many thousands.
The stories are numerous. They all demonstrate one undeniable fact about how God operates and plans. He does not want us depending on our own resources in any area of our lives. He wants us to depend on Him for every area. He wants us to live in the supernatural as compared to the natural.
Confirming Decisions
Now that we have established some guidelines for planning, we need to discuss ways to confirm our plans. There are times when we must make quick decisions during the course of a day and we need to have the freedom to use our God-given wisdom to make those decisions.
God speaks throughmany different ways and as we become one with Him, we become more integrated in our ability to move and be led by the Holy Spirit (Rom. 8:14). The scriptures do not indicate that God was constantly communicating moment by moment with His people. However, God does encourage us to seek Him moment by moment in our lives.
Not every decision we must make can afford, nor is it necessary, to be confirmed. Jesus encourages us to abide in the vine, which means we should be walking in close fellowship with Him and know that He is guiding us throughout our day.
However, the scriptures also convey a principle of confirmation that can greatly reduce the frequency of making poor decisions and allow us to make good plans. I would highly recommend that any major decision be confirmed through a few different sources.
F. B. Meyer’s Formula
One night as the famous Bible teacher F.B. Meyer stood on the deck of a ship approaching land, he wondered how the crew knew when and how to safely steer to the dock. It was a stormy night, and visibility was low.
Meyer, standing on the bridge and peering through the window, asked “Captain, how do you know when to turn this ship into that narrow harbor?”
“That’s an art,” replied the captain. “Do you see those three red lights on the shore? When they’re all in a straight line I go right in!”
Later Meyer said: “When we want to know God’s will, there are three things which always occur: the inward impulse, the Word of God, and the trend of circumstances…Never act until these three things agree.”
The Role of Spouses in Making Decisions
When John Benson decided to make some financial investments in a new business venture, he was very excited about the possibilities for a handsome financial return. His business and financial background had served him well.
John felt strongly that his wife Jenny would not understand the complexity of his investment, so he casually mentioned it to her. When she asked a few simple questions, John became defensive and justified his investing in the venture.
Jenny felt uneasy about the investment, but since he had been so successful in the past, she laid aside her reservations and left the responsibility up to John.
A year later, after investing a large sum of money, John received a phone call from the investment company. It seems that the principals of the company had fled the country and were not to be found. All the investors who had put money in the company were going to lose their investment with no ability to recoup it. Many astute investors had been taken in on the scam.
This story could be retold repeatedly across the world. God’s principles for making decisions require input from both spouses, regardless of their level of expertise.
I learned this lesson the hard way after making many independent decisions outside the counsel of my wife. Today, whenever I am faced with a major decision, I first consult the Lord, and then I consult with my wife. She may disagree totally with something that seems very straightforward to me, but I have learned not to not move forward if she is not in agreement. She does not need to know all the details, nor does she have to have expertise. God has placed in her a “chip” called“intuition”. That intuition cannot explain why she feels the way she does, she just knows when something is not right.
Conversely, husbands bring a totally different perspective that may give an alternative side to asituation that the wife has never considered. God has called married couples to be one. If we seek to make decisions independently, then we are benefiting from only 50% of the intended resource God has placed within our grasp.
In marriage, this stewardship of decisions requires two people. God blesses this union by honoring the decisions made with the motive of glorifying God and relying on His Spirit to lead in our decision-making process.
Confirmation Through Others
The scriptures encourage us to seek advice and counsel from others. This counsel needs to be from other Godly people who share the same values and goals that we have.
Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. (Proverbs 15:22)
The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.(Proverbs 12:15)
Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice. (Proverbs 13:10)
Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will bewise. (Proverbs 19:20)
Make plans by seeking advice; if you wage war, obtain guidance.(Proverbs 20:18)
Keeping A Balance With Counsel from Others
We should strive to maintain balance when seeking input from others and making decisions as we feel God is leading. This process is designed to confirm direction for which we are seeking confirmation.
Paul was sensitive to getting too heavy-handed in the confirmation process. He offered advice but was not the enforcer of someone’s decision.
And here is my advice about what is best for you in this matter. (2 Corinthians 8:10)
There is a principle of agreement among two or three individuals throughout the scriptures to confirm a decision, but even this does not negate a person’s right to make independent decisions. The requirement for efficient administration frequently requires single points of decision-making. Where there is willingness and trust to receive input, there is probably also humility, faith, and grace for God to work His pleasure in His servant. Where there is unwillingness, the opposite is true.
There have been times in my life where I have felt strongly about a certain issue only to receive feedback from those close to me which revealed that I was not accurate in my assessment of the situation. I have learned to yield in such situations, trusting that God is working through those in whom I am accountable.
Peace of Mind
Peace of mind is another important confirmation for decisions. If you do not have peace about a decision, you should wait until God gives you peace. This does not mean your decision may not have some tension due to the faith aspect of it, but deep down you should have a peace that it is the right decision.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Phil 4:6-7)
I hope these thoughts will help you as you seek to plan and make decisions through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Any enterprise is built by wise planning, becomes strong through common sense, and profits wonderfully by keeping abreast of the facts.
(Proverbs 24:3,4 LB)
Owning and operating an advertising agency meant I was required to develop strategic plans for companies. This meant developing plans several years ahead.
I have always believed in planning ahead. I have written many strategic plans for companies over the years.
However, there was a time when I experienced a constant state of uncertainty in my business and personal life, and I realized I could only plan so much. Things changed from day to day.
This inability to plan more than a week, or in some cases a day in advance, caused me to rethink the whole idea of planning as it relates to life and work. God was doing something in my life that could not be planned. So, if I sought to develop specific plans around what I thought God was doing, Iran adrift. It was only when I knew what God was leading that I could plan effectively.
It's a problem of using a human, logical approach versus a Spirit-led approach.
I have discovered in working with so many Christian organizations over the years, and even in my life, that human planning without the Spirit of God leading in that planning leads to presumption, failure and disappointment.
The people of Israel often fell into the habit of their own reasoning apart from the spirit of God. This frustrated God because He actually desired to accomplish things in a shorter timetable, but was unable to due to Israel's disobedience.
I am the LORD your God, who brought you up out of Egypt. Open wide your mouth and I will fill it.
But my people would not listen to me; Israel would not submit to me. So I gave them over to their stubborn hearts to follow their own devices.
If my people would but listen to me, if Israel would follow my ways, how quickly would I subdue their enemies and turn my hand against their foes! (Psalm 81:10-14)
God can accomplish more in six months through a people yielded to Him than we could accomplish in 70 years without Him. God wanted to accomplish His plan for the people of Israel a lot faster, but their disobedience prevented them from allowing Him to move on their behalf.
I must confess that it is a whole lot easier to develop a written plan for my life and execute that plan than to depend on God each day. Total dependence is a humbling condition. Unfortunately, that is exactly how God wants us to walk with Him -- in total dependence on Him day-by-day.
God is tearing apart the plans of many men and women in the workplace today because He wants to rebuild them in the way they operate in life and work. He wants total dependence upon Him, not just an occasional prayer of guidance.
George Mueller
George Mueller was a pastor in England during the nineteenth century. He was concerned that God's people had become very discouraged. They no longer looked for God to do anything unusual. They no longer trusted God to answer prayers. They had lost their faith.
Mueller began to pray as God led Him. His prayers were for God to lead him to a work that could only be explained by the people as an act of God. George wanted the people to learn that their God was a faithful, prayer-answering God.
He came upon the verse in Psalm 81:10 -- "Open wide your mouth and I will fill it." God began to lead him in a walk of faith that became an outstanding testimony to all who hear of his story.
When he felt led of God to do some work, he prayed for the resources needed and told no one of the need. He wanted all to know that God had provided for the need only in answer to prayer and faith. During his ministry in Bristol, Mueller started Scriptural Knowledge Institute for distribution of Scripture and for religious education. He also began an orphanage.
By the time of his death, George Mueller had been used by God to build four orphan houses that cared for 2,000 children at a time. Over 10,000 children had been provided for through the orphanages. He distributed over eight million dollars that had been given to him in answer to prayer. When he died at 93, his worldly possessions were valued at $800.
Oswald Chambers made an observation about planning. "Much of modern Christian enterprise is 'Ishmael.' Born not of God, but of an inordinate desire to do God’s will in our own way – the one thing our Lord never did.
"The LORD foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the LORD stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations. (Psalm 33:10-11)
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. (Isaiah 55:8)
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose thatprevails. (Proverbs 19:21)
Our biggest problem with planning is that we plan and carry out things in our own wisdom that only God has a right to determine. We cannot know the when, or where, or how of God's will until He tells us. God's whole method of directing us is designed for us to experience Him in the process of walking with Him. It is process-based versus outcome-based.
The methods that God used to accomplish His purposes were creative and often illogical to the human mind. Consider God requiring Joshua to walk around the city of Jericho seven times, or standing at the waters edge of the Jordan before God parted the waters for the people to pass on dry ground. Consider the blind man being told to wash his eyes with mud in order to receive sight. Consider Gideon being charged to fight with only 300 against many thousands.
The stories are numerous. They all demonstrate one undeniable fact about how God operates and plans. He does not want us depending on our own resources in any area of our lives. He wants us to depend on Him for every area. He wants us to live in the supernatural as compared to the natural.
Confirming Decisions
Now that we have established some guidelines for planning, we need to discuss ways to confirm our plans. There are times when we must make quick decisions during the course of a day and we need to have the freedom to use our God-given wisdom to make those decisions.
God speaks throughmany different ways and as we become one with Him, we become more integrated in our ability to move and be led by the Holy Spirit (Rom. 8:14). The scriptures do not indicate that God was constantly communicating moment by moment with His people. However, God does encourage us to seek Him moment by moment in our lives.
Not every decision we must make can afford, nor is it necessary, to be confirmed. Jesus encourages us to abide in the vine, which means we should be walking in close fellowship with Him and know that He is guiding us throughout our day.
However, the scriptures also convey a principle of confirmation that can greatly reduce the frequency of making poor decisions and allow us to make good plans. I would highly recommend that any major decision be confirmed through a few different sources.
F. B. Meyer’s Formula
One night as the famous Bible teacher F.B. Meyer stood on the deck of a ship approaching land, he wondered how the crew knew when and how to safely steer to the dock. It was a stormy night, and visibility was low.
Meyer, standing on the bridge and peering through the window, asked “Captain, how do you know when to turn this ship into that narrow harbor?”
“That’s an art,” replied the captain. “Do you see those three red lights on the shore? When they’re all in a straight line I go right in!”
Later Meyer said: “When we want to know God’s will, there are three things which always occur: the inward impulse, the Word of God, and the trend of circumstances…Never act until these three things agree.”
The Role of Spouses in Making Decisions
When John Benson decided to make some financial investments in a new business venture, he was very excited about the possibilities for a handsome financial return. His business and financial background had served him well.
John felt strongly that his wife Jenny would not understand the complexity of his investment, so he casually mentioned it to her. When she asked a few simple questions, John became defensive and justified his investing in the venture.
Jenny felt uneasy about the investment, but since he had been so successful in the past, she laid aside her reservations and left the responsibility up to John.
A year later, after investing a large sum of money, John received a phone call from the investment company. It seems that the principals of the company had fled the country and were not to be found. All the investors who had put money in the company were going to lose their investment with no ability to recoup it. Many astute investors had been taken in on the scam.
This story could be retold repeatedly across the world. God’s principles for making decisions require input from both spouses, regardless of their level of expertise.
I learned this lesson the hard way after making many independent decisions outside the counsel of my wife. Today, whenever I am faced with a major decision, I first consult the Lord, and then I consult with my wife. She may disagree totally with something that seems very straightforward to me, but I have learned not to not move forward if she is not in agreement. She does not need to know all the details, nor does she have to have expertise. God has placed in her a “chip” called“intuition”. That intuition cannot explain why she feels the way she does, she just knows when something is not right.
Conversely, husbands bring a totally different perspective that may give an alternative side to asituation that the wife has never considered. God has called married couples to be one. If we seek to make decisions independently, then we are benefiting from only 50% of the intended resource God has placed within our grasp.
In marriage, this stewardship of decisions requires two people. God blesses this union by honoring the decisions made with the motive of glorifying God and relying on His Spirit to lead in our decision-making process.
Confirmation Through Others
The scriptures encourage us to seek advice and counsel from others. This counsel needs to be from other Godly people who share the same values and goals that we have.
Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed. (Proverbs 15:22)
The way of a fool seems right to him, but a wise man listens to advice.(Proverbs 12:15)
Pride only breeds quarrels, but wisdom is found in those who take advice. (Proverbs 13:10)
Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will bewise. (Proverbs 19:20)
Make plans by seeking advice; if you wage war, obtain guidance.(Proverbs 20:18)
Keeping A Balance With Counsel from Others
We should strive to maintain balance when seeking input from others and making decisions as we feel God is leading. This process is designed to confirm direction for which we are seeking confirmation.
Paul was sensitive to getting too heavy-handed in the confirmation process. He offered advice but was not the enforcer of someone’s decision.
And here is my advice about what is best for you in this matter. (2 Corinthians 8:10)
There is a principle of agreement among two or three individuals throughout the scriptures to confirm a decision, but even this does not negate a person’s right to make independent decisions. The requirement for efficient administration frequently requires single points of decision-making. Where there is willingness and trust to receive input, there is probably also humility, faith, and grace for God to work His pleasure in His servant. Where there is unwillingness, the opposite is true.
There have been times in my life where I have felt strongly about a certain issue only to receive feedback from those close to me which revealed that I was not accurate in my assessment of the situation. I have learned to yield in such situations, trusting that God is working through those in whom I am accountable.
Peace of Mind
Peace of mind is another important confirmation for decisions. If you do not have peace about a decision, you should wait until God gives you peace. This does not mean your decision may not have some tension due to the faith aspect of it, but deep down you should have a peace that it is the right decision.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Phil 4:6-7)
I hope these thoughts will help you as you seek to plan and make decisions through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Courage for the Timid and Insecure
Some of us are timid by nature.
Prone to self-doubt, we require constant affirmation and approval which others are not always prepared or able to give.
This sometimes extends to matters of faith, when we allow our relationship with God to be clouded by what a third party - a loved one, a concerned friend, a fellow Christian, an unbeliever - thinks.
We need to remind ourselves that we are all imperfect. Even the most saintly person has sinned at some point in thought, word or deed. When we stand before God on Judgment Day, we shall then see ourselves and each other clearly, and there will be surprises.
The Bible warns that the word of God is living and active. It judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart (Heb. 4:12), the very things that are invisible to the outside world. The world prizes appearance and image above truth. The Bible says nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight (Heb. 4:13). The eyes of the Lord are in every place keeping watch on the evil and the good.
What comfort then, for those who are timorous of spirit and do not know how to assert themselves effectively?
What encouragement can we offer those who crave external confirmation that they are doing the right thing?
What advice do we give someone who is in need?
Paul says we should hold firmly to the faith we profess, because we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God. (Heb. 4:14) It is not in our imperfect selves or in another's opinion that we should trust (thank God!), but in the One who is perfectly trustworthy and dependable - Jesus.
We rejoice because not only is Jesus deserving of our trust, He is also compassionate and merciful. He does not stand afar and mock our weak attempts to live right. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet without sin. (Heb. 4:15)
If we remember that no one is above sin, we will have a healthier view of others and of ourselves.
We will learn to expect less from those who always seem to have their act together, who can seem to do no wrong, because we know that inside, they are as fallible as anyone else.
We will learn to be gentle with ourselves when we slip, because Jesus is Himself gentle and merciful.
Does this mean we can compromise our morality or close an eye to sin because it is to be expected of a fallen world?
No. The Bible makes it very clear that we must give account to God for the thoughts and attitudes of our hearts and everything we do in this lifetime.
How then should we ask for help?
Heb. 4:16 says that those who need help can ask for it and receive it. Not in a grovelling manner, as though God might say 'no' or 'go away', but with confidence, because He is a God of mercy and grace.
With God we have no need to "stand on ceremony", feel "pai seh" or feel we are unworthy of good things. A child never doubts that Mummy or Daddy will give him the peanut butter sandwich or bike that he asks for. So too can we go to God naturally and confidently to ask for what we need.
This may be a difficult thing to accept for those accustomed to being told they are unworthy of love or plain "not good enough". Not all of us have had the blessing of being raised in a loving, accepting environment.
But with God, we can start anew.
We can ask for courage to confront, accept and overcome our imperfections.
We can ask for a healthy dose of self-love so that we can begin to lead fruitful lives, unencumbered by memories of past pain and rejection.
We Can Ask.
Prone to self-doubt, we require constant affirmation and approval which others are not always prepared or able to give.
This sometimes extends to matters of faith, when we allow our relationship with God to be clouded by what a third party - a loved one, a concerned friend, a fellow Christian, an unbeliever - thinks.
We need to remind ourselves that we are all imperfect. Even the most saintly person has sinned at some point in thought, word or deed. When we stand before God on Judgment Day, we shall then see ourselves and each other clearly, and there will be surprises.
The Bible warns that the word of God is living and active. It judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart (Heb. 4:12), the very things that are invisible to the outside world. The world prizes appearance and image above truth. The Bible says nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight (Heb. 4:13). The eyes of the Lord are in every place keeping watch on the evil and the good.
What comfort then, for those who are timorous of spirit and do not know how to assert themselves effectively?
What encouragement can we offer those who crave external confirmation that they are doing the right thing?
What advice do we give someone who is in need?
Paul says we should hold firmly to the faith we profess, because we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God. (Heb. 4:14) It is not in our imperfect selves or in another's opinion that we should trust (thank God!), but in the One who is perfectly trustworthy and dependable - Jesus.
We rejoice because not only is Jesus deserving of our trust, He is also compassionate and merciful. He does not stand afar and mock our weak attempts to live right. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are - yet without sin. (Heb. 4:15)
If we remember that no one is above sin, we will have a healthier view of others and of ourselves.
We will learn to expect less from those who always seem to have their act together, who can seem to do no wrong, because we know that inside, they are as fallible as anyone else.
We will learn to be gentle with ourselves when we slip, because Jesus is Himself gentle and merciful.
Does this mean we can compromise our morality or close an eye to sin because it is to be expected of a fallen world?
No. The Bible makes it very clear that we must give account to God for the thoughts and attitudes of our hearts and everything we do in this lifetime.
How then should we ask for help?
Heb. 4:16 says that those who need help can ask for it and receive it. Not in a grovelling manner, as though God might say 'no' or 'go away', but with confidence, because He is a God of mercy and grace.
With God we have no need to "stand on ceremony", feel "pai seh" or feel we are unworthy of good things. A child never doubts that Mummy or Daddy will give him the peanut butter sandwich or bike that he asks for. So too can we go to God naturally and confidently to ask for what we need.
This may be a difficult thing to accept for those accustomed to being told they are unworthy of love or plain "not good enough". Not all of us have had the blessing of being raised in a loving, accepting environment.
But with God, we can start anew.
We can ask for courage to confront, accept and overcome our imperfections.
We can ask for a healthy dose of self-love so that we can begin to lead fruitful lives, unencumbered by memories of past pain and rejection.
We Can Ask.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Introduction to NLP
The following article is from Coaching Inspirations, a newsletter of the Life Coaching Institute of Australia.
Neuro-Linguistic Programming: An Introduction
The term "Neuro-Linguistic Programming" (NLP) refers to the models and principles that relate to the interaction of mind and neurology (neuro), language (linguistic) and perception. These interact to create an individual's subjective reality and behaviour.
History
In the 1970s, Richard Bandler, a psychology student, and John Grinder, an associate professor of linguistics, studied the language and behavioural patterns of successful and effective therapists. The results of this research sparked the emergence of a new field - the field of neuro-linguistic programming (NLP).
Current Status
Today, NLP is used internationally by millions of people within an array of occupational groups, from counsellors, coaches and motivational speakers to sales managers and marketers. Many neuro-linguistic programming techniques have arisen that provide step-by-step procedures for 'running your own mind' in an attempt to produce excellence in performance. With such an assortment of techniques on offer, any attempt to condense the entire scope of NLP into one resource would serve only to dilute its essence.
You will be introduced to the fundamental techniques of NLP using representational systems to develop rapport, reframing to alter the meaning of an experience and the swish pattern to alter ineffective behaviour patterns. Each of these techniques can be expanded or modified depending on its intended aim or purpose.
Over the course of NLP's development, various 'schools' or 'branches' of NLP have emerged. If you conduct your own research in this area, you may notice that different 'brands' of NLP exist, each with their own set of standards and procedures.
Essentially, NLP is a very specific way of modelling. If, for example, you know somebody who is an excellent tennis player and you would like to play just like him/her, what would you do? You could study what makes this person a good player and then model exactly what is done. In essence, it is this modelling that NLP practitioners are focused on. The aforementioned tennis player may envisage, for example, the tennis ball hitting the racket, just before it happens.
Presuppositions
The map is not the territory: Our mental representations (or maps) of the world are not the world. We respond to our mental maps, rather than the world. Mental maps, especially feelings and interpretations, can be modified, updated or altered more easily than the world around us can be changed.
Experience has structure: Our thoughts and memories have a pattern or structure to them. When we change that pattern or structure, our experience will change. We can neutralise unpleasant memories and enhance those memories that serve us well.
If one person can do something, anyone can learn to do it: We can learn the mental map of someone who has achieved what we seek to achieve and in that way, make it our own.
The mind and body are parts of the same system: Our thoughts continuously affect our physical being - muscle tension, breathing, emotional reactions, and more. These in turn affect our thoughts. When we learn to change one, we have simultaneously learned to change the other.
We cannot NOT communicate: We are always communicating. If we are not speaking, we are at least communicating non-verbally. Words are often the least important part of any communication transaction. A sigh, a smile and a look are all communications. Even our thoughts are an inner form of communication that are conveyed or revealed to others through such indicators as our eyes, voice tones and other non-verbal cues.
The meaning of communication is the response we get: Others receive and filter what we say and do through their own mental maps. When someone interprets our words or actions differently to how we intended, it's a chance for us to take note and seek to modify our communication so that next time it is clearer.
Underlying every behaviour is a positive intention: Behind every hurtful or thoughtless behaviour there exists a positive purpose. When somebody yells, for example, they may be seeking acknowledgement. Someone may hit out in an attempt to protect themselves from perceived danger or hide in order to feel safe. Rather than condemning or judging these actions, we can identify the positive intent and encourage more positive choices that meet the same intent.
People are always making the best choice(s) available to them: Everyone has a unique personal history. Within it, we have learned how to respond to life events and experiences. The choices each of us make are the ones we believe to be best for us at that particular point in time.
Process
To understand the process of NLP, the first stage is to understand where the process begins. The process begins with an event external to the individual that is experienced through the sensory input channels:
Visual: including what we see or the way someone looks at us.
Auditory: which includes sounds, the words we hear and the way that people say those words to us.
Kinaesthetic: or external feelings, which include the touch of someone or something, the pressure and the texture.
Olfactory: which is smell.
Gustatory: which is taste.
Extracted from James, T., & Woodsmall, W. (1988). Time Line Therapy and the Basis of Personality. Capitola: Meta Publications.
Before we make an internal representation of an event we filter it through a variety of internal processing filters. These filters can delete, distort or generalise information, leading to an inaccurate or modified version of the experience.
Deletion involves the process of selectively paying attention to specific aspects of an experience (James & Woodsmall, 1988). Through deletion we fail to notice particular sensory information. For example, Ben's sister is picking him up from a concert. He is looking out intently for her car which he knows is a bright red hatchback. Because he is so focused on seeing a small red car, he fails to hear his sister calling him from a blue sedan (which she had borrowed from a friend). As you can see from the example, Ben is so focused on the visual aspect of his experience (see a red car) that he fails to notice (or deletes) the auditory aspect of his experience (his sister calling him).
Distortion occurs when we misrepresent the sensory data received (James & Woodsmall, 1988). For example, Juanita thought she heard rain falling. She ran out to take her washing off the line only to discover that it wasn't rain at all - it was the sound of the neighbour's air conditioning starting up. This is an example of auditory distortion where Juanita thought she heard one thing when in fact it was something completely different.
Generalisation is the process of making a judgement based on a limited number of experiences and attributing that judgement to a broad array of experiences (James & Woodsmall, 1988). For example, Tyson and Nicky are looking to rent a new home. They visit their local real estate agent.
Tyson feels as though this particular agent is only interested in working with people who are seeking to purchase a home, rather than rent one. Nicky later overhears Tyson say to a friend, "Real estate agents are all the same. They only want your business if you're buying!" As you can see from this example, Tyson has had one experience with one real estate agent and generalises this to all real estate agents.
Neuro-Linguistic Programming: An Introduction
The term "Neuro-Linguistic Programming" (NLP) refers to the models and principles that relate to the interaction of mind and neurology (neuro), language (linguistic) and perception. These interact to create an individual's subjective reality and behaviour.
History
In the 1970s, Richard Bandler, a psychology student, and John Grinder, an associate professor of linguistics, studied the language and behavioural patterns of successful and effective therapists. The results of this research sparked the emergence of a new field - the field of neuro-linguistic programming (NLP).
Current Status
Today, NLP is used internationally by millions of people within an array of occupational groups, from counsellors, coaches and motivational speakers to sales managers and marketers. Many neuro-linguistic programming techniques have arisen that provide step-by-step procedures for 'running your own mind' in an attempt to produce excellence in performance. With such an assortment of techniques on offer, any attempt to condense the entire scope of NLP into one resource would serve only to dilute its essence.
You will be introduced to the fundamental techniques of NLP using representational systems to develop rapport, reframing to alter the meaning of an experience and the swish pattern to alter ineffective behaviour patterns. Each of these techniques can be expanded or modified depending on its intended aim or purpose.
Over the course of NLP's development, various 'schools' or 'branches' of NLP have emerged. If you conduct your own research in this area, you may notice that different 'brands' of NLP exist, each with their own set of standards and procedures.
Essentially, NLP is a very specific way of modelling. If, for example, you know somebody who is an excellent tennis player and you would like to play just like him/her, what would you do? You could study what makes this person a good player and then model exactly what is done. In essence, it is this modelling that NLP practitioners are focused on. The aforementioned tennis player may envisage, for example, the tennis ball hitting the racket, just before it happens.
Presuppositions
The map is not the territory: Our mental representations (or maps) of the world are not the world. We respond to our mental maps, rather than the world. Mental maps, especially feelings and interpretations, can be modified, updated or altered more easily than the world around us can be changed.
Experience has structure: Our thoughts and memories have a pattern or structure to them. When we change that pattern or structure, our experience will change. We can neutralise unpleasant memories and enhance those memories that serve us well.
If one person can do something, anyone can learn to do it: We can learn the mental map of someone who has achieved what we seek to achieve and in that way, make it our own.
The mind and body are parts of the same system: Our thoughts continuously affect our physical being - muscle tension, breathing, emotional reactions, and more. These in turn affect our thoughts. When we learn to change one, we have simultaneously learned to change the other.
We cannot NOT communicate: We are always communicating. If we are not speaking, we are at least communicating non-verbally. Words are often the least important part of any communication transaction. A sigh, a smile and a look are all communications. Even our thoughts are an inner form of communication that are conveyed or revealed to others through such indicators as our eyes, voice tones and other non-verbal cues.
The meaning of communication is the response we get: Others receive and filter what we say and do through their own mental maps. When someone interprets our words or actions differently to how we intended, it's a chance for us to take note and seek to modify our communication so that next time it is clearer.
Underlying every behaviour is a positive intention: Behind every hurtful or thoughtless behaviour there exists a positive purpose. When somebody yells, for example, they may be seeking acknowledgement. Someone may hit out in an attempt to protect themselves from perceived danger or hide in order to feel safe. Rather than condemning or judging these actions, we can identify the positive intent and encourage more positive choices that meet the same intent.
People are always making the best choice(s) available to them: Everyone has a unique personal history. Within it, we have learned how to respond to life events and experiences. The choices each of us make are the ones we believe to be best for us at that particular point in time.
Process
To understand the process of NLP, the first stage is to understand where the process begins. The process begins with an event external to the individual that is experienced through the sensory input channels:
Visual: including what we see or the way someone looks at us.
Auditory: which includes sounds, the words we hear and the way that people say those words to us.
Kinaesthetic: or external feelings, which include the touch of someone or something, the pressure and the texture.
Olfactory: which is smell.
Gustatory: which is taste.
Extracted from James, T., & Woodsmall, W. (1988). Time Line Therapy and the Basis of Personality. Capitola: Meta Publications.
Before we make an internal representation of an event we filter it through a variety of internal processing filters. These filters can delete, distort or generalise information, leading to an inaccurate or modified version of the experience.
Deletion involves the process of selectively paying attention to specific aspects of an experience (James & Woodsmall, 1988). Through deletion we fail to notice particular sensory information. For example, Ben's sister is picking him up from a concert. He is looking out intently for her car which he knows is a bright red hatchback. Because he is so focused on seeing a small red car, he fails to hear his sister calling him from a blue sedan (which she had borrowed from a friend). As you can see from the example, Ben is so focused on the visual aspect of his experience (see a red car) that he fails to notice (or deletes) the auditory aspect of his experience (his sister calling him).
Distortion occurs when we misrepresent the sensory data received (James & Woodsmall, 1988). For example, Juanita thought she heard rain falling. She ran out to take her washing off the line only to discover that it wasn't rain at all - it was the sound of the neighbour's air conditioning starting up. This is an example of auditory distortion where Juanita thought she heard one thing when in fact it was something completely different.
Generalisation is the process of making a judgement based on a limited number of experiences and attributing that judgement to a broad array of experiences (James & Woodsmall, 1988). For example, Tyson and Nicky are looking to rent a new home. They visit their local real estate agent.
Tyson feels as though this particular agent is only interested in working with people who are seeking to purchase a home, rather than rent one. Nicky later overhears Tyson say to a friend, "Real estate agents are all the same. They only want your business if you're buying!" As you can see from this example, Tyson has had one experience with one real estate agent and generalises this to all real estate agents.
The Feminist Mistake: Are We Giving Up Too Much? by Leslie Bennetts
The main thing I want to say to other women is this: protect yourself.
Given the likelihood that you will have to fend for yourself at some point in the future, maintain the capacity to support yourself.
Protect your children by making sure you can support them financially should anything happen to their father.
Protect your future happiness against the doubts harboured by frustrated stay-at-home mothers who can't shake the guilt and regret they feel about failing to explore their full potential.
Protect yourself against the desolation of the empty nest, which inflicts the deepest sense of loss on full-time mothers with no other identity to sustain them.
Protect yourself against the feelings of uselessness and isolation experienced by so many women who didn't cultivate meaningful work that would nourish them in later years.
You'll be glad you did.
Given the likelihood that you will have to fend for yourself at some point in the future, maintain the capacity to support yourself.
Protect your children by making sure you can support them financially should anything happen to their father.
Protect your future happiness against the doubts harboured by frustrated stay-at-home mothers who can't shake the guilt and regret they feel about failing to explore their full potential.
Protect yourself against the desolation of the empty nest, which inflicts the deepest sense of loss on full-time mothers with no other identity to sustain them.
Protect yourself against the feelings of uselessness and isolation experienced by so many women who didn't cultivate meaningful work that would nourish them in later years.
You'll be glad you did.
Friday, September 07, 2007
Future Proof Your Career
How will your job be different five years from now? Indeed, will your job even exist in its present form in five years, or in 10 or even 20 years time? And over this time, what will happen to the company and industry you work for?
We really don't know what the future holds. What we do know for certain is that change is a constant in the workplace. This means that what we are doing now will be different in the future.
How can you predict and prepare for this workplace of the future? What should you be doing now to avoid reaching a dead end in your career?
This article gives you some strategies you can begin pursuing now. They will help you keep your skills current and your opportunities open. Pick and choose from among them to build your unique Future Proofing Kit. And remember, as your own circumstances change, your kit may need to adapt as well. Refer back to this list often and take inventory of what you should be doing either differently from, or in addition to, what you are doing now.
Future Proofing Kit
Find an "Academy" company. If you're early in your career, get a job at a company renowned in its industry for developing its people (traditional examples are GE, Toyota and Mars.) When you work for this kind of company, you are enrolled in a continuous development program that goes well beyond the technical skills you need for your current role. This forms a great foundation for a successful career.Get and remain tech-savvy.
Much of the change we see has to do with new technology. We keep finding faster and leaner ways to do things. Force yourself to keep your technical skills current, even if new developments don't seem directly related to your current job. Otherwise, you'll get left behind and may have to catch up a huge amount before you can head off in a new direction in the future. If that means learning the newest online tools like blogging and web conferencing, do it. If you're in a highly technical field of work, be proactive and stay current - even when your company does not.
Develop your competencies, skills and experience.
Along with technical skills, it is critically important to continue your professional development to remain in demand in the marketplace. Make sure you develop the transferable skills that are universally sought by employers. Leadership, communication, innovation, stress management and interpersonal skills are all fundamental requirements of the jobs of today and tomorrow.
Here are some ways to do this:
Choose two competencies or skills to improve each year. Monitor and track your progress.
Develop a five year learning plan to acquire the knowledge and education you need.
Develop cross-functional skills. Beyond a certain stage in your career and in uncertain environments, specialization is no longer the route of choice. It can pay off for some; however, it has high risk of obsolescence attached.
And yes, consider joining our Career Excellence Club to learn these skills.
Your specific technical skills may get out of date. That's why you see nurses with business skills and technology experts with financial experience. A broad range of competencies, skills and abilities can help you secure a new job or may even open the door to working in a new industry.
To maximize your chances of success, use the tips found in the Personal Goal Setting article to help you set development goals effectively, and if you have our Personal Development Plan Workbook, make sure you use it to plan your skills development.
"Think global."
In many industries, geographical barriers to business are getting less and less relevant. Your co-workers, clients and stakeholders now and in the future can be from anywhere in the world. You need to acquire the ability to work within the international marketplace by:
Learning about working with diverse cultures.
Asking for assignments that require international exposure.
Learning another language.
The more experience you get, the more confidence you will have when working in the global marketplace. This will make you much more attractive to employers in the future.
Create and maintain a success journal.
The time to start thinking about your accomplishments and skills is not when you are looking for a new job. You need to be proactive and take continuous inventory of what you do really well, the accolades you have been given and the noteworthy results you've been responsible for. Employers want to know what you will do for them. When you have a ready list of things you have done, it is much easier to recall your most relevant achievements and skills.
Track your duties, projects and results.
Keep a list of professional development activities you've participated in.
List the training you've completed.
Note your volunteer work.
File your performance reviews and the written letters and emails you receive that note your performance.
Use this success journal to track your strengths and successes and also to affirm your wonderful qualities as well. All of us need to boost our confidence and self esteem from time to time. Having a list of objective strengths and accomplishments can do a lot to improve your motivation and belief in your abilities.
Build and maintain a professional network.
Make sure that you develop good relationships with people both within and outside your organization. These people will be invaluable as the landscape of work changes. They can bring you along with them as they weather changes, and can provide opportunities when your current position looks uncertain. When you add a mentor or two to your network, you have the added bonus of learning new skills, technologies and strategies that will help you move your career in the direction you want.
Collect business cards.
Keep track of former bosses and colleagues.
Join professional networking associations.
Participate in a wide range of activities and build relationships beyond your current career or industry.
Scan the environment.
Be aware of changes and trends in the economy, your profession and the industry you are in. No one can accurately predict the future; however stay ahead of the crowd by keeping yourself informed, and choosing to work in industries – and for employers – that have long-term sustainability.
Keep track of business trends by reading a good newspaper and the industry press.
Complete a PEST analysis for your industry and others you are interested in.
Analyze the attractiveness of your company using Porter's Five Forces and USP Analysis.
Back your hunches and analysis with action. If you think your company or industry is in trouble, it's best to get out while the going's good!
Overall, avoid industries and companies that are on a downward slide. Being an expert in a dying field may provide a niche strategy into the medium term; however, you will eventually have to leave. It is better to prepare now.
Keep a clear career path open.
You may be fortunate enough to be in an organization where there's a clear and attractive career path ahead of you. For many, this will not be the case. This may not be a problem if you're in a fast growth industry – if you're good at what you do, opportunities will most-likely appear with alarming regularity. However if you're in a slow growth industry or are one in decline, then this is a problem: There may be no onward path, and development may be blocked, however hard you work. This will lead to frustration, boredom and, in the long term, failure to achieve your potential.
This is where you need to review your options and take action to unblock your career, even if it means a job- or career-change. See our article on Career Planning to find out how to do this.
Develop resilience.
Because the future is uncertain, you will probably encounter setbacks no matter how much you prepare and plan. People who will be successful are those with the ability to bounce back and consider such setbacks as learning experiences.
Evaluate and affirm your strengths on a regular basis.
Develop realistic and achievable goals, monitor your progress and identify what is holding you back.
Build your flexibility and maintain your enthusiasm despite what is happening around you.
All of these techniques can be very useful as you begin to plan and prepare for your future. And they all have in common the elements of risk management and career planning. You need to become good at both to secure your future career.
Key Points:
While your job description may not be relevant in the future, you can ensure the skills you bring to the table are. With some forethought and planning, you can take control of your future career today. The key is not so much in how skilled you are at predicting what will happen, it is in how attuned you are to the early indications of change.
When you realize that change is constant and you are constantly planning so you stay ahead of the game, you will find yourself in a great position to recognize and capitalize on the opportunities that present themselves.
This article is supported by Dianna Podmoroff of the Mind Tools Career Excellence Club. To contact Dianna and comment on this article, simply email Customer.Helpdesk@mindtools.com
We really don't know what the future holds. What we do know for certain is that change is a constant in the workplace. This means that what we are doing now will be different in the future.
How can you predict and prepare for this workplace of the future? What should you be doing now to avoid reaching a dead end in your career?
This article gives you some strategies you can begin pursuing now. They will help you keep your skills current and your opportunities open. Pick and choose from among them to build your unique Future Proofing Kit. And remember, as your own circumstances change, your kit may need to adapt as well. Refer back to this list often and take inventory of what you should be doing either differently from, or in addition to, what you are doing now.
Future Proofing Kit
Find an "Academy" company. If you're early in your career, get a job at a company renowned in its industry for developing its people (traditional examples are GE, Toyota and Mars.) When you work for this kind of company, you are enrolled in a continuous development program that goes well beyond the technical skills you need for your current role. This forms a great foundation for a successful career.Get and remain tech-savvy.
Much of the change we see has to do with new technology. We keep finding faster and leaner ways to do things. Force yourself to keep your technical skills current, even if new developments don't seem directly related to your current job. Otherwise, you'll get left behind and may have to catch up a huge amount before you can head off in a new direction in the future. If that means learning the newest online tools like blogging and web conferencing, do it. If you're in a highly technical field of work, be proactive and stay current - even when your company does not.
Develop your competencies, skills and experience.
Along with technical skills, it is critically important to continue your professional development to remain in demand in the marketplace. Make sure you develop the transferable skills that are universally sought by employers. Leadership, communication, innovation, stress management and interpersonal skills are all fundamental requirements of the jobs of today and tomorrow.
Here are some ways to do this:
Choose two competencies or skills to improve each year. Monitor and track your progress.
Develop a five year learning plan to acquire the knowledge and education you need.
Develop cross-functional skills. Beyond a certain stage in your career and in uncertain environments, specialization is no longer the route of choice. It can pay off for some; however, it has high risk of obsolescence attached.
And yes, consider joining our Career Excellence Club to learn these skills.
Your specific technical skills may get out of date. That's why you see nurses with business skills and technology experts with financial experience. A broad range of competencies, skills and abilities can help you secure a new job or may even open the door to working in a new industry.
To maximize your chances of success, use the tips found in the Personal Goal Setting article to help you set development goals effectively, and if you have our Personal Development Plan Workbook, make sure you use it to plan your skills development.
"Think global."
In many industries, geographical barriers to business are getting less and less relevant. Your co-workers, clients and stakeholders now and in the future can be from anywhere in the world. You need to acquire the ability to work within the international marketplace by:
Learning about working with diverse cultures.
Asking for assignments that require international exposure.
Learning another language.
The more experience you get, the more confidence you will have when working in the global marketplace. This will make you much more attractive to employers in the future.
Create and maintain a success journal.
The time to start thinking about your accomplishments and skills is not when you are looking for a new job. You need to be proactive and take continuous inventory of what you do really well, the accolades you have been given and the noteworthy results you've been responsible for. Employers want to know what you will do for them. When you have a ready list of things you have done, it is much easier to recall your most relevant achievements and skills.
Track your duties, projects and results.
Keep a list of professional development activities you've participated in.
List the training you've completed.
Note your volunteer work.
File your performance reviews and the written letters and emails you receive that note your performance.
Use this success journal to track your strengths and successes and also to affirm your wonderful qualities as well. All of us need to boost our confidence and self esteem from time to time. Having a list of objective strengths and accomplishments can do a lot to improve your motivation and belief in your abilities.
Build and maintain a professional network.
Make sure that you develop good relationships with people both within and outside your organization. These people will be invaluable as the landscape of work changes. They can bring you along with them as they weather changes, and can provide opportunities when your current position looks uncertain. When you add a mentor or two to your network, you have the added bonus of learning new skills, technologies and strategies that will help you move your career in the direction you want.
Collect business cards.
Keep track of former bosses and colleagues.
Join professional networking associations.
Participate in a wide range of activities and build relationships beyond your current career or industry.
Scan the environment.
Be aware of changes and trends in the economy, your profession and the industry you are in. No one can accurately predict the future; however stay ahead of the crowd by keeping yourself informed, and choosing to work in industries – and for employers – that have long-term sustainability.
Keep track of business trends by reading a good newspaper and the industry press.
Complete a PEST analysis for your industry and others you are interested in.
Analyze the attractiveness of your company using Porter's Five Forces and USP Analysis.
Back your hunches and analysis with action. If you think your company or industry is in trouble, it's best to get out while the going's good!
Overall, avoid industries and companies that are on a downward slide. Being an expert in a dying field may provide a niche strategy into the medium term; however, you will eventually have to leave. It is better to prepare now.
Keep a clear career path open.
You may be fortunate enough to be in an organization where there's a clear and attractive career path ahead of you. For many, this will not be the case. This may not be a problem if you're in a fast growth industry – if you're good at what you do, opportunities will most-likely appear with alarming regularity. However if you're in a slow growth industry or are one in decline, then this is a problem: There may be no onward path, and development may be blocked, however hard you work. This will lead to frustration, boredom and, in the long term, failure to achieve your potential.
This is where you need to review your options and take action to unblock your career, even if it means a job- or career-change. See our article on Career Planning to find out how to do this.
Develop resilience.
Because the future is uncertain, you will probably encounter setbacks no matter how much you prepare and plan. People who will be successful are those with the ability to bounce back and consider such setbacks as learning experiences.
Evaluate and affirm your strengths on a regular basis.
Develop realistic and achievable goals, monitor your progress and identify what is holding you back.
Build your flexibility and maintain your enthusiasm despite what is happening around you.
All of these techniques can be very useful as you begin to plan and prepare for your future. And they all have in common the elements of risk management and career planning. You need to become good at both to secure your future career.
Key Points:
While your job description may not be relevant in the future, you can ensure the skills you bring to the table are. With some forethought and planning, you can take control of your future career today. The key is not so much in how skilled you are at predicting what will happen, it is in how attuned you are to the early indications of change.
When you realize that change is constant and you are constantly planning so you stay ahead of the game, you will find yourself in a great position to recognize and capitalize on the opportunities that present themselves.
This article is supported by Dianna Podmoroff of the Mind Tools Career Excellence Club. To contact Dianna and comment on this article, simply email Customer.Helpdesk@mindtools.com
Thursday, September 06, 2007
What if your spouse thinks you should forget about Network Marketing?
I want to share a fantastic article I read tonight in Michael Oliver's newsletter.
Michael is the author of How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety or Losing Your Friends.
If you've been thinking of going into Network Marketing and your spouse doesn't exactly share your enthusiasm, this article's for you.
Have A Contract With Yourself To Be 1000% Responsible For You And Your Own Success
Here is a question of the type I get on a regular basis from people who struggle with many external influences in their lives.
My (spouse) thinks I should just get a real job and forget about Network Marketing. He is getting tired of me ordering different plans and really not finding one that works. There is something about it that really appeals to me and I am always looking to see what I can find. I know this will work and I’m just not ready to give up on it yet. I would appreciate any information you can give me. Hope to hear from you soon.- LW, St Elmo, IL
My response....
First. With regards to the different “plans” you talk about, ask yourself these questions...
What part or parts of the different plans you have been using and rejecting, are not working for you?
What parts of them are working.
Write your answers down in two columns... "What works for me" - "What doesn't work for me". If what isn't working outweighs what is, then search for a plan that has got more of what is working. Then STICK to it!
Second. Sticking to it requires discipline, a word which many define as too restrictive and the opposite to freedom. HOWEVER, like most conventional thinking – this is simply NOT true!
With discipline comes freedom.
For example - Nature disciplines itself and we are every much a part of nature as the trees that grow and even the seasons. Nature doesn’t decide to skip a season because something more interesting comes along. It might be late or early on occasion. The seasons might even vary as to temperatures etc.
But the seasons still turn up!
Heed the quote; “It was character that got us out of bed, commitment that moved us into action, and discipline that enabled us to follow through.”
Are YOU Working?
The critical questions to ask is yourself is... "Am I working?"
By that I mean....
Are you willing to invest the time in learning how to communicate with people?
Do you have a real desire to change your present circumstances?
Do you have the commitment to take action, day in day out, to achieve your desire by talking with people every day – seeing if you can help them get what they want so that you can ultimately get what you want?
As for your spouse telling you to get a job... the choice is yours. You can either settle for the so called security of a regular paycheck by working for someone else. Or you can establish your own security by taking your own path to financial, personal, mental and spiritual freedom.
In my book "How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety Or Losing Your Friends!" I include this comment…
"Find your own truth, by shedding the truths of others that prevent you from having the freedom and abundance that is your universal right."
Perhaps you could ask your spouse for help in this. I'm sure your spouse is just as interested as you are in wanting you to be successful and happy!
There is no right or wrong to whatever you do. The secret is to find what FEELS right for you and then ACT on it... taking 1000% responsibility for your own success allowing no one to get in the way.
Michael is the author of How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety or Losing Your Friends.
If you've been thinking of going into Network Marketing and your spouse doesn't exactly share your enthusiasm, this article's for you.
Have A Contract With Yourself To Be 1000% Responsible For You And Your Own Success
Here is a question of the type I get on a regular basis from people who struggle with many external influences in their lives.
My (spouse) thinks I should just get a real job and forget about Network Marketing. He is getting tired of me ordering different plans and really not finding one that works. There is something about it that really appeals to me and I am always looking to see what I can find. I know this will work and I’m just not ready to give up on it yet. I would appreciate any information you can give me. Hope to hear from you soon.- LW, St Elmo, IL
My response....
First. With regards to the different “plans” you talk about, ask yourself these questions...
What part or parts of the different plans you have been using and rejecting, are not working for you?
What parts of them are working.
Write your answers down in two columns... "What works for me" - "What doesn't work for me". If what isn't working outweighs what is, then search for a plan that has got more of what is working. Then STICK to it!
Second. Sticking to it requires discipline, a word which many define as too restrictive and the opposite to freedom. HOWEVER, like most conventional thinking – this is simply NOT true!
With discipline comes freedom.
For example - Nature disciplines itself and we are every much a part of nature as the trees that grow and even the seasons. Nature doesn’t decide to skip a season because something more interesting comes along. It might be late or early on occasion. The seasons might even vary as to temperatures etc.
But the seasons still turn up!
Heed the quote; “It was character that got us out of bed, commitment that moved us into action, and discipline that enabled us to follow through.”
Are YOU Working?
The critical questions to ask is yourself is... "Am I working?"
By that I mean....
Are you willing to invest the time in learning how to communicate with people?
Do you have a real desire to change your present circumstances?
Do you have the commitment to take action, day in day out, to achieve your desire by talking with people every day – seeing if you can help them get what they want so that you can ultimately get what you want?
As for your spouse telling you to get a job... the choice is yours. You can either settle for the so called security of a regular paycheck by working for someone else. Or you can establish your own security by taking your own path to financial, personal, mental and spiritual freedom.
In my book "How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety Or Losing Your Friends!" I include this comment…
"Find your own truth, by shedding the truths of others that prevent you from having the freedom and abundance that is your universal right."
Perhaps you could ask your spouse for help in this. I'm sure your spouse is just as interested as you are in wanting you to be successful and happy!
There is no right or wrong to whatever you do. The secret is to find what FEELS right for you and then ACT on it... taking 1000% responsibility for your own success allowing no one to get in the way.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
What The Mind Can Believe, It Can Achieve
Is it possible to become successful just by thinking about it?
Research has proven that the mind cannot tell the difference between a real occurrence and one that has been well-imagined. The moment you experience an event vividly in your imagination it is recorded as experience.
Mental Rehearsal
Picture this... Liu Chi Kung, a world-class pianist in the late 1950's, was imprisoned during the Cultural Revolution in China . After seven years without a piano he immediately resumed his concert tour. His fans said he played better than ever and wondered how this was possible. Kung said, 'I rehearsed every piece I had ever played, note by note, in my mind.'
Mental rehearsal, or the process of visualization, can give you a competitive edge. Olympic athletes have used it in training for years and it works not only in sports but for every goal you set.
Picture This
The next time you make a presentation, book an important appointment, or attempt a challenge outside your comfort zone, gain the edge. Practice mental rehearsal beforehand. You can think your way to success. You don't need any special tools, it doesn't cost anything, and you can begin right now.
Picture that!
From Coaching Compass, newsletter of CoachTrainingAlliance
Reflection:
I've been thinking long and hard about this one.
On an intellectual level, I 'know' that positive thinking brings positive results, that As A Man Thinketh, So Is He, The Law of Attraction etc etc.
But I've rarely endeavoured to put this principle in practice.
What I've continually struggled with is this: is there a moral or spiritual element to engaging in such a process?
Should there be a good cause, a noble purpose, before I apply positive thinking to something?
Do I even need to go there?
The more I think about it, the stronger a particular thought has presented itself to me: the principle itself, that Positive Thinking Brings Positive Results, is a universal law.
It applies to all things, all situations and all people.
Because it is a universal law, it will always work if applied correctly.
Because it is a universal law, my feelings about it are irrelevant.
Because it is a universal law, it is available and accessible to all.
The only thing that is holding me back from experiencing possible positive outcomes - is me.
History, anecdotal evidence and my own experience illustrate the dramatic outcomes or missed opportunities that result from exercise of the principle.
Think you can - and events, people and resources will come together to make it happen.
Think you can't - and you subconsciously push the positive outcome away.
On its own, the principle is morally and spiritually neutral.
But I can make it moral and spiritual by choosing to exercise it for a good cause or a noble purpose.
So because this principle is neutral and can be used for good or bad, I have a moral responsibility as a thinking, spiritually conscious person and a practising Christian, to apply the principle responsibly.
But the fundamental principle remains unchanged: ask, and you shall receive.
Research has proven that the mind cannot tell the difference between a real occurrence and one that has been well-imagined. The moment you experience an event vividly in your imagination it is recorded as experience.
Mental Rehearsal
Picture this... Liu Chi Kung, a world-class pianist in the late 1950's, was imprisoned during the Cultural Revolution in China . After seven years without a piano he immediately resumed his concert tour. His fans said he played better than ever and wondered how this was possible. Kung said, 'I rehearsed every piece I had ever played, note by note, in my mind.'
Mental rehearsal, or the process of visualization, can give you a competitive edge. Olympic athletes have used it in training for years and it works not only in sports but for every goal you set.
Picture This
The next time you make a presentation, book an important appointment, or attempt a challenge outside your comfort zone, gain the edge. Practice mental rehearsal beforehand. You can think your way to success. You don't need any special tools, it doesn't cost anything, and you can begin right now.
Picture that!
From Coaching Compass, newsletter of CoachTrainingAlliance
Reflection:
I've been thinking long and hard about this one.
On an intellectual level, I 'know' that positive thinking brings positive results, that As A Man Thinketh, So Is He, The Law of Attraction etc etc.
But I've rarely endeavoured to put this principle in practice.
What I've continually struggled with is this: is there a moral or spiritual element to engaging in such a process?
Should there be a good cause, a noble purpose, before I apply positive thinking to something?
Do I even need to go there?
The more I think about it, the stronger a particular thought has presented itself to me: the principle itself, that Positive Thinking Brings Positive Results, is a universal law.
It applies to all things, all situations and all people.
Because it is a universal law, it will always work if applied correctly.
Because it is a universal law, my feelings about it are irrelevant.
Because it is a universal law, it is available and accessible to all.
The only thing that is holding me back from experiencing possible positive outcomes - is me.
History, anecdotal evidence and my own experience illustrate the dramatic outcomes or missed opportunities that result from exercise of the principle.
Think you can - and events, people and resources will come together to make it happen.
Think you can't - and you subconsciously push the positive outcome away.
On its own, the principle is morally and spiritually neutral.
But I can make it moral and spiritual by choosing to exercise it for a good cause or a noble purpose.
So because this principle is neutral and can be used for good or bad, I have a moral responsibility as a thinking, spiritually conscious person and a practising Christian, to apply the principle responsibly.
But the fundamental principle remains unchanged: ask, and you shall receive.
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Why Do You Believe What You Believe?
I was teaching Bethany this morning what Jesus said about servanthood.
While flipping the NT to look for the passage where Jesus washed His disciples' feet (which I finally found in John 13), I was impressed with a sense of how radical and confronting Jesus must have been to the Jews, how He challenged everything they thought they knew about God, and how they tried hard to resist accepting what He said.
I laughed at the parts when the Jews repeatedly said to Jesus, "Tell us plainly if you are the Christ!" and Jesus in exasperation said (as He might have in Singlish), "Tell you already you don't believe, so what for you still ask?"
Isn't that like us too when we refuse to accept what is before us, because to do so would mean giving up cherished beliefs?
Had I been a traditional Jew in the time of Jesus, and had I been brought up to believe the Messiah was still to come, I too might have had difficulty accepting that this miracle maker going around healing the blind and lame and mingling with tax collectors and prostitutes was the Son of God that He claimed to be.
Likewise if someone were to come up to me today and declare himself the Messiah.
What makes someone willing to take another at their word, to the extent of accepting their authority, acknowledging their superior status and being willing to stand or fall with them?
To extrapolate further, how do people come to their respective faiths?
Because of the families and communities they were brought up in, or in spite of them?
While flipping the NT to look for the passage where Jesus washed His disciples' feet (which I finally found in John 13), I was impressed with a sense of how radical and confronting Jesus must have been to the Jews, how He challenged everything they thought they knew about God, and how they tried hard to resist accepting what He said.
I laughed at the parts when the Jews repeatedly said to Jesus, "Tell us plainly if you are the Christ!" and Jesus in exasperation said (as He might have in Singlish), "Tell you already you don't believe, so what for you still ask?"
Isn't that like us too when we refuse to accept what is before us, because to do so would mean giving up cherished beliefs?
Had I been a traditional Jew in the time of Jesus, and had I been brought up to believe the Messiah was still to come, I too might have had difficulty accepting that this miracle maker going around healing the blind and lame and mingling with tax collectors and prostitutes was the Son of God that He claimed to be.
Likewise if someone were to come up to me today and declare himself the Messiah.
What makes someone willing to take another at their word, to the extent of accepting their authority, acknowledging their superior status and being willing to stand or fall with them?
To extrapolate further, how do people come to their respective faiths?
Because of the families and communities they were brought up in, or in spite of them?
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Back To School by Will Craig
The kids are back in school. Are you?
We live in a knowledge-powered economy and if we're not continually upgrading our capabilities we become obsolete. The good news is the educational choices we make at 18 don't need to be hard and fast choices we're stuck with for a lifetime.
You can choose to look at lifelong learning as the homework assignment that never goes away. Or, you can choose to look at it as an essential strategy for living long and living well.
I'm not suggesting you must go to college to gain the necessary knowledge. What college did do for me was make me recognize that organized learning, whether in traditional schools or through condensed courses and teleclasses, would significantly shorten my learning curve.
"Don't let your schooling interfere with your education."- Mark Twain
Had I to do it all over again I might choose a succession of bite-sized learning opportunities in the specific areas of my interest (recognizing those change over time). Short-term, condensed educational programs have become more available and recognized as an efficient way to gain specific expertise in less time without spending your life's savings on a long program.
Learning does not take place in a box we call a classroom or in a hotel conference room. We learn more, we learn better, and we learn faster by doing and being actively involved. How are you upgrading your knowledge and abilities?
Will Craig is President of Coach Training Alliance and co-author of the #1 best-selling coaching self-study course, the Coach Training Accelerator.
We live in a knowledge-powered economy and if we're not continually upgrading our capabilities we become obsolete. The good news is the educational choices we make at 18 don't need to be hard and fast choices we're stuck with for a lifetime.
You can choose to look at lifelong learning as the homework assignment that never goes away. Or, you can choose to look at it as an essential strategy for living long and living well.
I'm not suggesting you must go to college to gain the necessary knowledge. What college did do for me was make me recognize that organized learning, whether in traditional schools or through condensed courses and teleclasses, would significantly shorten my learning curve.
"Don't let your schooling interfere with your education."- Mark Twain
Had I to do it all over again I might choose a succession of bite-sized learning opportunities in the specific areas of my interest (recognizing those change over time). Short-term, condensed educational programs have become more available and recognized as an efficient way to gain specific expertise in less time without spending your life's savings on a long program.
Learning does not take place in a box we call a classroom or in a hotel conference room. We learn more, we learn better, and we learn faster by doing and being actively involved. How are you upgrading your knowledge and abilities?
Will Craig is President of Coach Training Alliance and co-author of the #1 best-selling coaching self-study course, the Coach Training Accelerator.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Take Care of Yourself
Keeping the Balance
"Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths" (Etty Hillesum).
It isn't easy to juggle the demands of a career and personal life. For most people, it's an ongoing challenge to reduce stress and maintain harmony in key areas of their life. Here are some ideas to help you find the balance that's best for you (and a good suggestion for your clients):
§ Manage your time. Organise household tasks efficiently. Doing one or two loads of laundry every day rather than saving it all for your day off, and running errands in batches rather than going back and forth several times are good places to begin. A weekly familiar calendar of important dates and a daily list of to-dos will help you avoid deadline panic. If your employer offers a course in time management, ! sign up for it.
§ Rethink your cleaning standards. An unmade bed or sink of dirty dishes won't impact the quality of your life. Do what needs to be done and let the rest go. If you can afford it, pay someone else to clean your house.
§ Communicate clearly. Limit time-consuming misunderstandings by communicating clearly and listening carefully. Take notes if it helps.
§ Nurture yourself. Set aside time each day for an activity that you enjoy, such as walking, working out or listening to music.
§ Unwind after a hectic workday by reading, practicing yoga or taking a bubble bath. Sitting down and watching the news is NOT recommended for relaxation or unwinding as many studies advise the news creates an upward shift in anxiety and stress levels.
§ Get enough sleep. There's nothing as stressful and potentially dangerous as working when you're sleep-deprived. Not only is your productivity affected, but you can also make costly mistakes. You may then have to work even more hours to make up for those mistakes.
§ Bolster your support system. Give yourself the gift of a trusted friend or co-worker to talk with during times of stress and hardship. If you're part of a religious community, take advantage of the support your religious leader can provide. Ensure you have trusted friends and relatives who can assist you when you need to work overtime or travel on your job.
Balance doesn't mean doing everything. Examine your priorities and set boundaries. Be firm in what you can and cannot do. Only you can restore harmony to your lifestyle.
"Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths" (Etty Hillesum).
It isn't easy to juggle the demands of a career and personal life. For most people, it's an ongoing challenge to reduce stress and maintain harmony in key areas of their life. Here are some ideas to help you find the balance that's best for you (and a good suggestion for your clients):
§ Manage your time. Organise household tasks efficiently. Doing one or two loads of laundry every day rather than saving it all for your day off, and running errands in batches rather than going back and forth several times are good places to begin. A weekly familiar calendar of important dates and a daily list of to-dos will help you avoid deadline panic. If your employer offers a course in time management, ! sign up for it.
§ Rethink your cleaning standards. An unmade bed or sink of dirty dishes won't impact the quality of your life. Do what needs to be done and let the rest go. If you can afford it, pay someone else to clean your house.
§ Communicate clearly. Limit time-consuming misunderstandings by communicating clearly and listening carefully. Take notes if it helps.
§ Nurture yourself. Set aside time each day for an activity that you enjoy, such as walking, working out or listening to music.
§ Unwind after a hectic workday by reading, practicing yoga or taking a bubble bath. Sitting down and watching the news is NOT recommended for relaxation or unwinding as many studies advise the news creates an upward shift in anxiety and stress levels.
§ Get enough sleep. There's nothing as stressful and potentially dangerous as working when you're sleep-deprived. Not only is your productivity affected, but you can also make costly mistakes. You may then have to work even more hours to make up for those mistakes.
§ Bolster your support system. Give yourself the gift of a trusted friend or co-worker to talk with during times of stress and hardship. If you're part of a religious community, take advantage of the support your religious leader can provide. Ensure you have trusted friends and relatives who can assist you when you need to work overtime or travel on your job.
Balance doesn't mean doing everything. Examine your priorities and set boundaries. Be firm in what you can and cannot do. Only you can restore harmony to your lifestyle.
Friday, August 24, 2007
Music School For Equipping Church Musicians
From Sep 05 to Apr 06, I spent one day a week at Believer Music learning how to be a better worship musician.
Sure I can play the keyboard, but having a formal qualification is no guarantee that one is able to play sensitively during worship time.
After one semester with Believer Music, I signed up without hesitation for another. And another. I was actually looking forward to cell group meetings again, because I had something new to offer. I was excited about playing the keyboard again, because I was approaching the instrument with new skills, a new way of playing, a new mindset. I couldn't wait to share the fruit of my practice sessions with my cell group members and congregation.
The training was fantastic, and it helped to have the same instructor move on with me as I advanced through the levels. My instructor had the sort of competence that commanded instant respect, a passion for teaching, patience for people who found the keyboard a challenge (the class caters to complete beginners, people who have no formal music background), and an attitude of reverence for what we were trying to achieve: a closer walk with God through music.
I'm not alone in my opinion of Believer Music and what it can do for church musicians who aspire to a higher level of excellence. Here are testimonials from others who've passed through their doors.
Sure I can play the keyboard, but having a formal qualification is no guarantee that one is able to play sensitively during worship time.
After one semester with Believer Music, I signed up without hesitation for another. And another. I was actually looking forward to cell group meetings again, because I had something new to offer. I was excited about playing the keyboard again, because I was approaching the instrument with new skills, a new way of playing, a new mindset. I couldn't wait to share the fruit of my practice sessions with my cell group members and congregation.
The training was fantastic, and it helped to have the same instructor move on with me as I advanced through the levels. My instructor had the sort of competence that commanded instant respect, a passion for teaching, patience for people who found the keyboard a challenge (the class caters to complete beginners, people who have no formal music background), and an attitude of reverence for what we were trying to achieve: a closer walk with God through music.
I'm not alone in my opinion of Believer Music and what it can do for church musicians who aspire to a higher level of excellence. Here are testimonials from others who've passed through their doors.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Luck - Not A Matter of Chance
From mX News, 20 Aug 2007
Visiting UK psychologist Richard Wiseman has a scientific explanation for why some people are luckier.
It all comes down to a positive mindset.
Wiseman, author of The Luck Factor and professor at the Uni of Hertfordshire, studied 1000 people who rated themselves exceptionally lucky or unlucky over 8 years.
He found that for the most part, people were making their own luck by the way they were behaving.
Being lucky came down to four principles:
Visiting UK psychologist Richard Wiseman has a scientific explanation for why some people are luckier.
It all comes down to a positive mindset.
Wiseman, author of The Luck Factor and professor at the Uni of Hertfordshire, studied 1000 people who rated themselves exceptionally lucky or unlucky over 8 years.
He found that for the most part, people were making their own luck by the way they were behaving.
Being lucky came down to four principles:
- Lucky people create opportunities
- They listen to hunches
- They expect good fortune
- They cope with bad luck
Note:
None of this will be new to supporters of James Allen's As A Man Thinketh, So Is He school of thought. Ditto for fans of The Secret and other Law of Attraction philosophies. Even the New Testament speaks frequently of the importance of faith and self-belief.
Underneath all these teachings is a recognition of a universal law at work, one that rewards you according to what is foremost in your mind.
The Dawkins Delusion
Richard Dawkins is a New Atheist and author of The God Delusion, in which he describes God as "the most unpleasant character in all fiction: jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully".
He has given several interviews on YouTube.
In response, someone has come up with a humorous rejoinder, saying there is no such person as Richard Dawkins and that Dawkins himself is a delusion.
Go here for the "interview" with Dr. Terry Tommyrot.
He has given several interviews on YouTube.
In response, someone has come up with a humorous rejoinder, saying there is no such person as Richard Dawkins and that Dawkins himself is a delusion.
Go here for the "interview" with Dr. Terry Tommyrot.
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